Brother,
I got to meet you, man! When are you stopping by Cabarete? You are a fuc&^ing freak, brother! I love that. Listen, I'm a freak too. No offense. You're arguments are very tight in some areas, but too loose in areas regarding the island, the community, the culture, and the economy. On some points, you're right on the money. In other areas, not so much. It's not your fault. you haven't been here long enough; you don't have access to some of the movers and shakers of this country. I have access to some of them, but i avoid them like the plague. I can't go anywhere where i have to wear shoes or pants. I only wear shorts, and I'm usually barefoot--both at work and home. My closest cousin just became the Governor of a big province here on this island and i was invited to the parade and festivities, but was told i would have to dress up for it. No thanks. I don't wear pants, socks, shoes, or underwear.
Anyway, You obviously like to read a lot. I like that. I can get behind that. Your're obviously educated and you've obviously self-educated yourself a great deal. I can get behind that as well. But listen, brother, you're social skills--or what some people refer to as "people skills"--need refined; they need fined tuning a little. If they're not, you will fail and never be able to hold on to a girlfriend here very long. This country is all about family and community. If you can't get the support of the family and friends behind you, you're relationship will run into some major obstacles that will doom it.
Listen, you're smart, you're articulate, you're blatantly honest. These are all admirable, fantastic qualities. But you need to consider socializing more in order to secure the necessary attributes to win over the family, friends and most importantly the girl of your dreams! If you can't socialize and charm to a certain extent, brother, how are you going to win the sincere love, affection, and admiration from a good Dominican female? People are not stupid here, despite any educational handicaps we have, people here are very social and everything is built around family and friends and socializing. Everything! Remember, everyone here has access to neighbors, family, and TV. This is not some mountain community of Quakers or Amish that both refrain and avoid modernity and communication. On the contrary, everyone here has family abroad. Everyone. You have to be willing to socialize with your girlfriend's friends and family. There is no way around this if you want a good, honest, girlfriend and wife. If you don't do this, you're just going to end up with a glorified prostitute masquerading as a good, honest girlfriend. It happens everyday here. I sit at a bar and watch it happen every single day to a new group of naive tourists that arrive here daily by plane.
Listen, i'm not smart, but I work in a bar and restaurant on the beach, so unfortunately, i'm privy to some of interactions of foreigners and expats that try to secure a Dominican girlfriend here. Some of the people that come down here looking for a good, honest girlfriend to take home are misfits, outcasts, anti-social, and dysfunctional at best. They get into these volatile relationships with the girls here and then when things head south, they never take any responsibility for the relationship's failure. Instead, they place blame everywhere else except on themselves. Don't get me wrong, everyone does this to a certain extent. It's human nature. But the more anti-social you are, the more dysfunctional you tend to be. Some people tend to fall down and sink into their own world; they retire into their comfort zones. They lock themselves in their condos and apartments and avoid people like the plague. I see this all the time...some people are introverted to a fault.
If you want to secure a good, honest Dominican woman, you're going to have to be able to socialize with not only her family and friends, but also outside in the real world...in the community where Domincans like to congregate and be among their own culture and people.
Yes, you can take a Dominican out of the country, but you will never, ever take the country out of the Dominican.
Love Frank