Do people think that because they're in front of a screen and behind a nickname they can accuse people, judge them? Whatever happened to good manners? Is asking a simple question regarding a precise topic is labeled to be a crime. It was nice interacting with some of you, reading all of you, even getting upset. But never would I have taken the freedom to start questioning the core of the persons, because after all I have no idea who they are and neither should they assume otherwise. Life is tough enough, so please a nice, even constructive criticism is good, accusations, leave them in you den, living room or wherever you computer is.
- Thread starter LaLouve
- Start date
What is it with people?
I agree, sometimes we must reflect back on our comments, judgements etc.
Many of us are expats or strangers in a somewhat different world of which possesses many challenges. I think help and support of one another whether it be personal, business, networking or just genuine information are our best assets we can give on this board.
I've had the same experience when I stuck my neck out posting a notorious is he a sanky type question... as my first post... and had my share of bashing accusations etc...but fortunately I have a thick skin and the ability to read between the lines. I was able to filter out the advice from the needless commentaries and was able to make some very much appreciated assistance through this site. Just don't get discouraged and take things with a grain of salt. 
I've had the same experience when I stuck my neck out posting a notorious is he a sanky type question... as my first post... and had my share of bashing accusations etc...but fortunately I have a thick skin and the ability to read between the lines. I was able to filter out the advice from the needless commentaries and was able to make some very much appreciated assistance through this site. Just don't get discouraged and take things with a grain of salt.
Nice post and yes, that is the only way to survive not only on this message board but any message board.
Hi All,
Thanks for responding Shiraz72 and Expat73. I jumped on my horses too fast and I apologize to the people who wrote to me by pm. I guess, we vacationers do not have the same perception of the reality even if I come from a very special place and I am an expat myself. Apologies.
Thanks for responding Shiraz72 and Expat73. I jumped on my horses too fast and I apologize to the people who wrote to me by pm. I guess, we vacationers do not have the same perception of the reality even if I come from a very special place and I am an expat myself. Apologies.
I agree as I have been a member of this forum longer now and have read many of the posts about that topic... however as a newbie...it's hard to hear that kind of stuff...luckily for me, my guy turned out to be legit...and others took me under their wing and gave me some sage advice...I'm grateful to bushbaby for that
I've had plenty of hard knocks in life and that's how I grew my thick skin...and I'm glad that I've learned from it...withoug becoming too jaded to be able to appreciate the positive experiences still out there to be had ....
Forgive the sometimes grumpy, curmudgeonly advice dispensed on DR1 on the topic of resort workers and sankies-but you must understand sometimes newbies post without reading first, without utilizing or accessing the wealth of information available to them on this site.
I've never understood how someone travels without doing a bit of research, especially when they are heading into uncharted waters like the DR.
And these resort stories-to this day it boggles my mind how anyone can be so naive as to think these animation workers or any other hotel staff can possibly be sincere.
But naive they are-that is why we are here to help. Some people may not appreciate the tone of the replies, as it ruins their fantasy of true love in an exotic, far-off land but at the end of the day the truth is the truth.
Some people let the rock star treatment they receive at these resorts get to their heads-my advice to them is if you want to be treated like a rock star, pick up a guitar and start practicing. Otherwise, be realistic, enjoy the attention for the insincere contrivance that it is and leave it behind you when you get on the plane.
I've never understood how someone travels without doing a bit of research, especially when they are heading into uncharted waters like the DR.
And these resort stories-to this day it boggles my mind how anyone can be so naive as to think these animation workers or any other hotel staff can possibly be sincere.
But naive they are-that is why we are here to help. Some people may not appreciate the tone of the replies, as it ruins their fantasy of true love in an exotic, far-off land but at the end of the day the truth is the truth.
Some people let the rock star treatment they receive at these resorts get to their heads-my advice to them is if you want to be treated like a rock star, pick up a guitar and start practicing. Otherwise, be realistic, enjoy the attention for the insincere contrivance that it is and leave it behind you when you get on the plane.
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Then perhaps the statements that say, "ask our friendly community for help!" should be modified to say, "be prepared for personal questions and bullying if you don't answer them, rude and sarcastic responses from people who don't want to help you, and moral judgments leading to character assassination."
I mean, really, why so much hostility? If everyone is enjoying this superior quality of life, why aren't they a little more relaxed and less vicious? Of course, when the posters are actually offended (because they have been treated rudely), they are quickly told they shouldn't live in this country because they don't have the right attitude.
Just another way for the poster to say, I don't know what the hell I'm posting,
If you are unable to post it in plain simple ENGLISH, don't put the blame on the reader for not "reading between the lines"........ Say what you mean!
I can just see the courts accepting that lame dumb a$$ excuse.
"But your honor, READ BETWEEN THE LINES" !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Perhaps I have a bad computer screen, I see only empty space between the lines here, perhaps that a true reflection of the poster's state of mind that says "read between the lines".
It's equivalent to using the word "perhaps" in every statement you make.
If you're wrong, you are still right because you said "perhaps".
If you do not understand this post, perhaps, try "Reading between the lines".......
(This post is dedicated to ALL those that do not have the ability to post what they really mean to say.)
Don
Reality Wake Up
Many an innocent poster asks a simple question and sometimes expects a certain answer.
If such answer is not given or plain facts do not support the OP's intentions or hopes things are taken 'personally' and then 'the messenger' is 'not nice, not respectful or not friendly'.
Guess, waking up into reality is not for everybody...
donP
Many an innocent poster asks a simple question and sometimes expects a certain answer.
If such answer is not given or plain facts do not support the OP's intentions or hopes things are taken 'personally' and then 'the messenger' is 'not nice, not respectful or not friendly'.
Guess, waking up into reality is not for everybody...
donP
The fact of the matter is that many of the members on DR1 are either married to, or in a serious relationship with, Dominicans. Some of us have been very lucky to find what some call a DDD [definitely different Dominican]. My own story could have turned out very, very different, because it began like so many of the tales here - I was introduced to him at a hotel where he worked [in a casino, still does in US] by one of the girls I went to DR with [she had been there before and was dating one of his friends. They didn't use the word sanky in 1975, but they were there even then]. When I got on the plane that day, I didn't even know where DR exactly was, I just wanted to escape NYC & lie in the sun.
Yes, I met a very serious and wonderful guy that day, but I was the exception. My friends were ALL sankified, caught up in the delight of being pursued by so many guys. Two of them moved there for a couple of years - when they were broke they came back to NY. One is happily married on Long Island, the other [never married] retired to Santo Domingo about 10-12 years ago.
So, sometimes, our motherly and fatherly instincts take over when we see someone we think is vulnerable posting about their new love in DR. Maybe we're jaded from seeing as much as we have. Maybe we overdo the advice, but we do it the way a parent tries to warn a child it's dangerous to play in the street. The sad truth is that for every story that turns out like mine [or like some others here on this forum] there are 1000 broken hearts and wallets. The even sadder truth is that like children who think their parents know nothing and have to learn things the hard way, the posters get their backs up when they don't like what they hear. It's human nature I guess.
We KNOW there are good, even great, Dominicans out there. We also know that most of those don't interact with foreigners. That's a fact. It's also a fact that there ARE exceptions, but they are few and far between.
AE
Yes, I met a very serious and wonderful guy that day, but I was the exception. My friends were ALL sankified, caught up in the delight of being pursued by so many guys. Two of them moved there for a couple of years - when they were broke they came back to NY. One is happily married on Long Island, the other [never married] retired to Santo Domingo about 10-12 years ago.
So, sometimes, our motherly and fatherly instincts take over when we see someone we think is vulnerable posting about their new love in DR. Maybe we're jaded from seeing as much as we have. Maybe we overdo the advice, but we do it the way a parent tries to warn a child it's dangerous to play in the street. The sad truth is that for every story that turns out like mine [or like some others here on this forum] there are 1000 broken hearts and wallets. The even sadder truth is that like children who think their parents know nothing and have to learn things the hard way, the posters get their backs up when they don't like what they hear. It's human nature I guess.
We KNOW there are good, even great, Dominicans out there. We also know that most of those don't interact with foreigners. That's a fact. It's also a fact that there ARE exceptions, but they are few and far between.
AE
I have watched and read for over 2 years and finally posted on this forum. The reason - the infighting, the nasty responses, the bullying and the attitude.
If you think it is only in the sanky / hotel worker type forums you are mistaken. In almost every thread it degenerates into juvenile behavior. While it may drive numbers and readership it also drives some people away.
My opinion only.
If you think it is only in the sanky / hotel worker type forums you are mistaken. In almost every thread it degenerates into juvenile behavior. While it may drive numbers and readership it also drives some people away.
My opinion only.
Oh that! :cheeky:
In my 1500 years ( seems that long
) on DR1 what I have noticed between men and women posters is this. Someone asks a question any question not just about men they met and there will always be jokers against us trying to liven things up and then there is useful information. The difference is that men will by pass the silliness and go to the informative answers but women might have 15 good posts to choose from but will head butt with the couple of people they think were being rude and take it personally and then the fun starts.Just bypass what you think is crap and really listen to what is important. Pick out the info you can really use and store the rest somewhere because as rude as some people might sound they are most likely right in the end especially the one that live in the DR and have seen things happen a thousand times before.
I was here 5 years before I was given the delete button
but I don't remember anyone being rude to me. Someone called me a housewife but that's about it and trust me things where 100 times worse back then. Not going to tell you what I've been called since getting a delete button though :laugh:
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I agree. I never read that forum (except for entertainment when I was home with a broken bone for a few months and out of movies) and I see the nasty responses all the time.
Good Morning All,
I beg to differ, I asked a question about activities for snowbirds in Samana as my husband and I were talking to my in-laws about an alternative to their vacationing in Spain. Of, course my father in law asked me if the country was safe especially after the tragedy that happened on the North Coast. I replied that the crime rate was not high something like this since I am too lazy to go check
Nothing about sanky pankies, please do not highjack the thread
I beg to differ, I asked a question about activities for snowbirds in Samana as my husband and I were talking to my in-laws about an alternative to their vacationing in Spain. Of, course my father in law asked me if the country was safe especially after the tragedy that happened on the North Coast. I replied that the crime rate was not high something like this since I am too lazy to go check
Nothing about sanky pankies, please do not highjack the thread
So did something happen on the thread you started, LaLouve, which upset you? I've looked at your thread on NE forum and I can't see anything offensive there, but of course it might have been removed.