Getting a Divorce

rh8371

New member
Nov 5, 2008
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I am currently contemplating getting a divorce from my dominican wife of four years because of her insane jealousy and Latina temper. We married in the DR but she now lives in the US with her son and my daugther. Am I able to file for divorce in the US or does it have to be in the DR where we got married. My biggest concern is joint custody of my daugther and I am afraid if we file for divorce in the DR I don't know how these things work.

what would be my chances if I were to seek full custody of my daugther?
 

AnnaC

Gold
Jan 2, 2002
16,050
418
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You do not need to get a divorce in the DR. Might be best to get one in the US since you all live there and you know how things work.

Good luck
 

Chuck T

Banned
Nov 30, 2010
723
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I am currently contemplating getting a divorce from my dominican wife of four years because of her insane jealousy and Latina temper. We married in the DR but she now lives in the US with her son and my daugther. Am I able to file for divorce in the US or does it have to be in the DR where we got married. My biggest concern is joint custody of my daugther and I am afraid if we file for divorce in the DR I don't know how these things work.

I still can't figure out why people get married, I did it once and that was enough. Why complicate what may be a great relationship with legalaties anyway ? I am serious.

what would be my chances if I were to seek full custody of my daugther?

I still can't figure out why people get married, I did it once and that was enough. Why complicate what may be a great relationship with legalaties anyway ? I am serious.
 

Criss Colon

Platinum
Jan 2, 2002
21,843
191
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yahoomail.com
I Married My First Wife In Thailand,Divorced Ger In The DR!

I married my Dominican wife here in the DR,But............

I plan to take her to Islamabad for the "DIVORCE"!!!!!!:dead::dead::dead::dead::dead::dead::cry::cry::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh:

CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC
 

RacerX

Banned
Nov 22, 2009
3,390
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I am currently contemplating getting a divorce from my dominican wife of four years because of her insane jealousy and Latina temper. We married in the DR but she now lives in the US with her son and my daugther. Am I able to file for divorce in the US or does it have to be in the DR where we got married. My biggest concern is joint custody of my daugther and I am afraid if we file for divorce in the DR I don't know how these things work.

what would be my chances if I were to seek full custody of my daugther?

You would still have that issue in the US in addition to, property allocation and division of assets AND child support arrangements established by the Family Court. You re better flying back to the DR and doing it. Use that Guzman guy, most others are frauds and waste your time and money. Any negative judgment you would get in the DR would still be in Pesos and not dollars so you will always come out on top.
 

greydread

Platinum
Jan 3, 2007
17,477
488
83
I am currently contemplating getting a divorce from my dominican wife of four years because of her insane jealousy and Latina temper. We married in the DR but she now lives in the US with her son and my daugther. Am I able to file for divorce in the US or does it have to be in the DR where we got married. My biggest concern is joint custody of my daugther and I am afraid if we file for divorce in the DR I don't know how these things work.

what would be my chances if I were to seek full custody of my daugther?

I'm assuming that the marriage was how she got into the Country in the first place which means that you signed on as her sponsor. Even if you got a Dominican divorce you are subject to Family Court decision in the US, regardless for as long as she lives in the US.

You bought the whole ticket, my Man and you are now liable for her and the child's welfare. In short, you are f#cked. If you have the desire to marry a Woman from another Country again make sure not to bring her back to your Country under any circumstances. She owns you and your happiness is the last thing the Courts will be concerned with. This is a lesson which you will not soon forget.

You can't unspill a glass of red wine on an alpaca carpet.
 

EverythingJeff

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Oct 31, 2010
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You can't unspill a glass of red wine on an alpaca carpet.

alpaca.jpg

"Tina you fat lard, come get some dinner!" Napoleon Dynamite
 

GinzaGringo

Member
Sep 29, 2010
382
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Divorce is actually a matter of state law, not US federal or Dominican federal law (whatever that is). So, whichever state you and she live in will have jurisdiction over the matter. If you two live in different states, you may be able to file in the state of your choosing. As far as physical custody of the children is concerned, that too will be a matter of state law. Again, the family laws of whichever state has jurisdiction over the divorce will be used to determine whether you can gain full physical custody. With that said, joint physical custody is the modern trend in family laws of most states, so unless she is a legitimately horrible person, you will likely have to share custody. The test is almost always "best interests of the children." That is very general, very solid, advice. But you need to consult an experienced family attorney in your home state and be prepared to spend a few thousand dollars in legal fees. I am sorry for your troubles and wish you the best of luck.
 

greydread

Platinum
Jan 3, 2007
17,477
488
83
Divorce is actually a matter of state law, not US federal or Dominican federal law (whatever that is). So, whichever state you and she live in will have jurisdiction over the matter. If you two live in different states, you may be able to file in the state of your choosing. As far as physical custody of the children is concerned, that too will be a matter of state law. Again, the family laws of whichever state has jurisdiction over the divorce will be used to determine whether you can gain full physical custody. With that said, joint physical custody is the modern trend in family laws of most states, so unless she is a legitimately horrible person, you will likely have to share custody. The test is almost always "best interests of the children." That is very general, very solid, advice. But you need to consult an experienced family attorney in your home state and be prepared to spend a few thousand dollars in legal fees. I am sorry for your troubles and wish you the best of luck.

Correct.... well, partially correct.

Divorce is granted by each State or Territory of the US as you stated...BUT...the Family Court jurisdictions are authorized by COUNTY/ CITY. For instance, I got married in Arlington County VA and filed their but I got divorced in the City of Alexandria VA for the purpose of expediting the process.

There is a cottage industry for divorces in many jurisdictions with short term residency requirements and very favorable property division/ child support formulas.

True story:

A friend whose ex moved to Texas (I swear) with her new Hubby decided that the child support award which was judged in Colorado, where they'd divorced could be renegotiated now that he'd moved to Maryland.....so...she took a trip to MD for 30 days where she visited an old friend. At the end of the 30 days she filed (as a new State resident) for a child support adjustment in Montgomery County Court and was awarded an amount roughly double the CO judgement. She then returned to TX with her winning lottery ticket and awaited her Monthly Baby Lotto check which was garnished from ex Hubby's pay until the child was 18 years old which is age of emancipation by law in MD......

Wait!

....Shortly after the State of MD got out of this guys pocket he found himself the owner of another judgement for child support (with arrears), this time from Family Court of the District of Columbia. She had spent another 30 day vacation there and since the age of emancipation is 21 for the purpose of establishing child support he was given a bill for the backdated child support from the child's 18th and payment forward to the 21st birthday.

Did I mention that during that time the Child was in College and that he was footing the entire bill with no help coming from the Mother? The Court would not accept this as evidence of support. Welcome to America's Courts!

Insult to injury...The Mother later sent him pictures of his Daughter's Step Dad walking her down the aisle at her wedding.

Like I said. If she knows what she's doing or if she gets advice from the Man-Hater's Legal Network, he is fu#ked unless he fights for custody and is awarded it. It's worth any amount of legal fee both emotionally and monetarily. Pay now or pay later.
 

GinzaGringo

Member
Sep 29, 2010
382
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Correct.... well, partially correct.

Divorce is granted by each State or Territory of the US as you stated...BUT...the Family Court jurisdictions are authorized by COUNTY/ CITY. For instance, I got married in Arlington County VA and filed their but I got divorced in the City of Alexandria VA for the purpose of expediting the process.

Wow wow wow, Grey, hold on. I am a lawyer licensed in two states and I can assure you the county laws have NO authority when it comes to divorce law. None. Do not be confused by the title of the courts. It is true, most states organize their courts by county but trust me, they all apply STATE law. It is also true that in many states you acquire a marriage license from a municipality or county government. But do not be confused by that. The municipal and county entities are applying STATE law. The family laws of each state are applied uniformly, across the state, although they are administered in a county courthouse.

This is the federal structure of the US government and legal system.

I am not doubting your anecdote, Grey, strange things happen. But what I am saying is, if your friend wants only one support judgment against him, he can easily have that. Your friend’s case is EASILY straightened out and the outcome is not in doubt, at all. His case is an “open and shut” case if there ever was one.

Separate support judgments from separate different states may occur in cases where there is more than one child involved, fathered in different states by different mothers, or something along those lines. But having double support orders, in that penalizing fashion… well, that may just be unconstitutional.

In any case, your friend’s case is odd and certainly not the norm.
 

greydread

Platinum
Jan 3, 2007
17,477
488
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Wow wow wow, Grey, hold on. I am a lawyer licensed in two states and I can assure you the county laws have NO authority when it comes to divorce law. None. Do not be confused by the title of the courts. It is true, most states organize their courts by county but trust me, they all apply STATE law. It is also true that in many states you acquire a marriage license from a municipality or county government. But do not be confused by that. The municipal and county entities are applying STATE law. The family laws of each state are applied uniformly, across the state, although they are administered in a county courthouse.

This is the federal structure of the US government and legal system.

I am not doubting your anecdote, Grey, strange things happen. But what I am saying is, if your friend wants only one support judgment against him, he can easily have that. Your friend?s case is EASILY straightened out and the outcome is not in doubt, at all. His case is an ?open and shut? case if there ever was one.

Separate support judgments from separate different states may occur in cases where there is more than one child involved, fathered in different states by different mothers, or something along those lines. But having double support orders, in that penalizing fashion? well, that may just be unconstitutional.

In any case, your friend?s case is odd and certainly not the norm.

There was never a misunderstanding about the States/ Territories being the sanctioning authority in cases of divorce/ family law and the regional courts having pretty much the same relationship as regional DMV centers. The different is that there is a whole lot of lattitude given these regional courts when it comes to the development and application of the formulas which determine child support and as you know this also varies wildly from State to State.

In the case I referred to there was a single Child involved and this is not the only case I have heard of where establishing residency in a State (or County to County for that matter) with higher child support requirements has happened, as a matter of fact it is quite commonplace. Child Support Enforcement is not a function of the State Government any farther than setting guidelines for the County/ City CSE agencies and they perform this function in compliance with Federal guidelines. Orders for CS payments come from the COUNTY, not the State. Subpoenas are served by COUNTY SHERIFF, not State Police and violators are imprisoned in County Jail, not the State pen. All the letterhead on all the official correspondence contains the COUNTY SEAL.

Your "lawyer" status does not alter the facts of CSE regardless how many States you are licensed to practice in. I don't mean any offense here but I have lived with the facts of life in this area of the law for over 35 years on both sides of the CSE fence and I've got the scars to prove it. I know too many others who have been in the same boat on both sides of this fence (single Mothers and Fathers) as well. Family law is not cut and dried and the guidelines from one level of oversight to another are vague enough to expect anything in court. There's a guy on one end of the street in a single jurisdiction who owns a $45,000 Cadillac Escalade paying $200/ mo. in support for one Child and a guy at the opposite end of the block who makes $45,000 A YEAR paying $1,500 for one Child.

If you are practicing the law then you already know that there's no equity in the application of the law. How much money we pay has little to do with the outcome of a case. Good lawyers are like good dentists. When you find one pay whatever it takes to keep them because "open and shut" cases lead to big surprises.
 

barker1964

Silver
Apr 1, 2009
3,413
2
38
Grey I agree with you I was paying 2800.00 a month in child support for 4 children and a friend of mine was paying 1600.00 for one and we both worked at the same job made the same money. Also the income of the mother (in my home state) does come into play. But I will tell you never get a woman pregnant in Florida they will bleed you dry.
 

GinzaGringo

Member
Sep 29, 2010
382
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Grey, you are correct law ENFORCEMENT (i.e. policing) happens on many different levels, including the federal level. However, the law that these cops are enforcing is state law. That is quite simply irrefutable.

When it comes to litigation and trials, you are correct, judges have discretion. They are, after all, human. Some are wife favorable, some are husband favorable. It all depends. Judges are not robots mechanistically applying an algorithm. There are as many different scenarios in family law as there are families. Every family is unique and for this reason I would argue judicial discretion is a must.

And this discretion is not unique to family law. Prisons and jails are loaded with guys who ended up on the wrong side of a judge’s discretion.

Of course, some laws are bad. But if you want to fix that bad law you need to talk to your STATE legislator… not a county sheriff or commissioner.
 

greydread

Platinum
Jan 3, 2007
17,477
488
83
The old saying "Justice is blind" is perfectly analogized as the Judge, Prosecutor and Defense (Master of the Court, Plaintiff and Defendant) are represented by the blind Men of the old Indian story....

One day a wise and mighty rajah was sitting at his window contemplating the vastness of his view, when his son came to him. "Father, what is the truth of things?" the young boy asked his father.
"A wonderful question!" the rajah said with delight, for he was well pleased that his son searching. "I will try to guide you to your answer."

He commanded his royal elephant to be brought forth. Outside the palace the father and son mounted the elephant and proceeded to the market place.

"Bring me three blind men", the rajah commanded. Three blind men were brought forth.

"Allow the blind men to examine the elephant", the rajah commanded.

Now the blind men had never known of an elephant and were excited to feel one for the first time in all their poor lives. One found his way to the elephant's tusk, another at its leg and the last at its tail.

When the three had finished the Rajah asked the blind men, "Describe the elephant to my son, that he might learn."

"Oh noble Rajah, it is like a spear", said the blind man who examined only the tusk.

"Oh noble Rajah, he is quite wrong, it is like a tree", said the blind man who examined only the leg.

"Most noble Rajah, they are both wrong, the elephant is like a rope" said the blind man who only examined the tail.

At this the three blind men began to bicker amongst themselves, each telling the others why he alone was right.

"Do you see it, my son?" the rajah said holding his son, while pointing at the three blind men. "The elephant is like the truth of all things and we are like the blind men."

OP,

Avoid Court at any cost. Find an arbitrator, an in-law, a preacher or somebody in a position to reflect common sense and rationality and broker a deal through an attorney. Take that deal to court and walk away knowing you did the best you could.
 

La Rubia

Bronze
Jan 1, 2010
1,336
28
0
You would still have that issue in the US in addition to, property allocation and division of assets AND child support arrangements established by the Family Court. You re better flying back to the DR and doing it. Use that Guzman guy, most others are frauds and waste your time and money. Any negative judgment you would get in the DR would still be in Pesos and not dollars so you will always come out on top.

Except, he's asking about custody, not how to get a cheap divorce, or how to reduce child support payments.

In terms of custody, the DR would be less favorable to the father--most likely would favor the mother.

If the documents are done in the DR and are in Spanish (or English translations from a foreign court) they might be problematic if you need to go back to court, or have to try for enforcement. (Example, she decides not go give you access--if she's the jealous type a possibility.) Also, if they are done in the DR, she could try to use it against you if she did something stupid like going to the DR to stay with the child without your permission. (If she works and has a decent income, may not come up, but if her only source of income comes from you, it may be tempting to go back to the DR to live.)

While stories and situations vary, as others have stated full custody to either parent doesn't happen without strong reasons, you'd most likely get joint custody. But do it in whatever state you live in.
 

La Rubia

Bronze
Jan 1, 2010
1,336
28
0
Avoid Court at any cost. Find an arbitrator, an in-law, a preacher or somebody in a position to reflect common sense and rationality and broker a deal through an attorney. Take that deal to court and walk away knowing you did the best you could.

Mediation is definitely recommended (required in some states) --but go to a "professional"--someone certified for that purpose. Court, then, will be a breeze. As for the in-laws and the preacher, well if you think it'd help. . . . .