divorce

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Isabellalynn

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Feb 8, 2012
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I am Canadian, living in Ontario. My soon to be ex-husband is living in dominican and was born there, he has not been to Canada. My daughter (he is the father) is 6 months old, born in Canada.
Found out he has another child who is 3 years old we have been married for 4 years!
I want to file for divorce in Ontario and with full custody and no visitation (as I am not going to be bringing her to see him). when she is old enough i will explain the facts of his cheating and she can decide what she wants to do.
I don't know if I have to go there to get divorced, or if I can do it here, I worry he won't sign anything. He is easy to locate as he is a musician in pto plata and people know him.
I want to do it here and not spend a lot of money! help
 
bob saunders

bob saunders

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Phone legal aid or consult with a family law practitioner in Ontario. I'm pretty sure you can do your divorce in Canada.
 
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Isabellalynn

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Feb 8, 2012
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I did not to do the divorce there, I did not want to bring my daughter there. Thanks everyone for your advice. I just did not want to have to pay for a lawyer in Canada and one in Dominican. Glad to know I don't have to go back there.
I know have a second question. The whore he had a baby with, while married to me, has been harassing me by email. She is not so smart, doing this in writing, but she told me she has my passport number (which has been expired since 2009) she copied it from our marriage certificate (he had it framed and hanging up, why I don't know, since he cheated) and she tells me keep this in mind I know everything about you. I really don't care but being in possession of Passport number and threatening me in writing is stupid. I will be giving this information to my divorce lawyer and he can do what he needs to with it. My ex-husband knows she has done this but he claims he does not talk to her and hates her, however, his words have no meaning to me, as he is a proven liar! Now should I contact any authorities down there as she basically has stolen my identity (she does not know it is expired)
 
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william webster

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Jan 16, 2009
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Get a grip .... the passport has expired, its no longer a passport. Forget that problem.

Seems that the general advice so far is to do your legal work in Canada. Fine.

You are A parent and as such have the authority to make certain decisions unitl your child comes of age.
Afetr that, you can no longer control - influence, perhaps - the child's decisions.

Sad story? Yes. First person to go thru this ? No

The best way thru is straight thru the middle.

Take care.... good luck and use your head.
You'll calm down at some point.

I have had a divorce.... a calm one, I'm happy to say.
They don't need to be confrontational.

WW.... future minister, divorce lawyer, general handholder
 
bob saunders

bob saunders

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Isabellalynn said:
I did not to do the divorce there, I did not want to bring my daughter there. Thanks everyone for your advice. I just did not want to have to pay for a lawyer in Canada and one in Dominican. Glad to know I don't have to go back there.
I know have a second question. The whore he had a baby with, while married to me, has been harassing me by email. She is not so smart, doing this in writing, but she told me she has my passport number (which has been expired since 2009) she copied it from our marriage certificate (he had it framed and hanging up, why I don't know, since he cheated) and she tells me keep this in mind I know everything about you. I really don't care but being in possession of Passport number and threatening me in writing is stupid. I will be giving this information to my divorce lawyer and he can do what he needs to with it. My ex-husband knows she has done this but he claims he does not talk to her and hates her, however, his words have no meaning to me, as he is a proven liar! Now should I contact any authorities down there as she basically has stolen my identity (she does not know it is expired)
Click to expand...

She just pulling on your chain. Change your e-mail and do not contact either of them. Ignore them and they'll go away. She can't do anything with your passport number.
 
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La Rubia

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Jan 1, 2010
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Isabellalynn said:
Now should I contact any authorities down there as she basically has stolen my identity (she does not know it is expired)
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No-one to contact, no-one will help you, except to take your money. I would be very protective of my own children's documentation, though, as there is always potential for fraud there. Very unlikely that anything can be done with your passport number, but probably reporting it stolen/lost might be advisable in case anything unusual happens.

She's getting what she wants from you--you are reacting to what she's doing, so it's working. Stop reacting, she'll go away. It's a tough pill to swallow, and I don't say it to be mean--but you may be the other woman, actually. She was with him most likely before you. You were part of their plan, and now you're not playing like you were supposed to. So she's going to be trying more things, as her chance and income have gone away.

I know you are hurting, but would also encourage you to be "neutral" on the cheating issue with your child. Painting a poor picture of her dad will not help her, and she has a right to know him on her terms. While he wronged you, he may have something to offer he--maybe not, but by convincing her he doesn't may cheat her out of an important part of knowing him she may need.

I don't know what it's like in Canada, but in the US when a minor child with a foreign parent turns 18, they can begin the process of bringing the parent to the US. If she's gotten doses of what he's like from him, she'll be less likely to seek that out to find out what he's like. So, I'd advise keeping the channels open, in a way that is protective of her, but also allows her to know who he is and what he's like.

Be strong, and keep asking the important questions.
 
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Isabellalynn

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Feb 8, 2012
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I never gave him money. I Never paid for anything for him before or now. I paid for my wedding dress he paid for the wedding. He calls me everyday, I don't answer. He texts me too, he wants me to move to Sto Domingo with him. I have been told by several unbias sources they are not together. His sister hates this girl, I trust his sister for many reasons, she is not a liar.
I don't want to be his wife I don't want anything from him. I just want him to leave me alone. I want his mistress to leave me alone (I never respond to her, I blocked her electronically) I did question why he married me when she was 9 months pregnant with his child, his response he did not love her and did not want the baby. I don't believe him!
 
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zoomzx11

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Jan 21, 2006
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Divorce him in Canada. Dominicans have a hard time getting off the island. He will not appear and you will have your way. As far as the cheating its the norm. Dont worry about one day getting a surprise visit. The Dominican men who cheat and have children in this fashion will not be interested in seeing their child. Just move on and forget him. Thats certainly what he is doing. Ignore any threats or harassment from his girlfriend. She cannot do anything and will just try and extort money from you. Change your email. This is an expensive lesson but you are not alone. Nearly identical stories abound here. Just go back and read em. Dont blame yourself, he did it to you and will do the same to other women. Its a pattern. Good luck.
 
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La Mariposa

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Jun 4, 2004
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zoomzx11 said:
Divorce him in Canada. Dominicans have a hard time getting off the island. He will not appear and you will have your way. As far as the cheating its the norm. Dont worry about one day getting a surprise visit. The Dominican men who cheat and have children in this fashion will not be interested in seeing their child. Just move on and forget him. Thats certainly what he is doing. Ignore any threats or harassment from his girlfriend. She cannot do anything and will just try and extort money from you. Change your email. This is an expensive lesson but you are not alone. Nearly identical stories abound here. Just go back and read em. Dont blame yourself, he did it to you and will do the same to other women. Its a pattern. Good luck.
Click to expand...

And maybe the ex to be husband and his girlfriiend, read common law wife, are together in the threats , harassment.
 
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AnnaC

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Isabellalynn said:
extracto de acta de matrimonio --- is this divorce or for something else?
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not sure what you are asking but "extracto de acta de matrimonio" is the "marriage certicifate" in short form and yes you will more then likely need that to get a divorce.
 
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Isabellalynn

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Feb 8, 2012
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i don't know if they are together. I have heard from many people they live in separate cities now. A friend of mine who lives in New YOrk now, her sister lives in Puerto Plata, she tells here everything she sees and then she tells me. I know she hates my soon to be ex, so she says they are not together, I trust that. There was never money involved from me, never gave him anything before during or now. With regards to her I heard when she got pregnant she asked for money from him to keep it a secret but then I heard they were living together. I would never have married him, if I knew about his pregnant girlfriend (which he claims was not). I am glad there was no money involved. I would never want to be with a man, sorry boy if he asked me for money! It is funny I never thought people could lie so much without caring. My soon to be ex wants to be together but that is not possible for me. He has sent money via Western Union for a airplane ticket but I never picked up the money I don't want it or him!
PS you guys are great, you are making my life easier. I am doing the divorce here I just did not know if they issued divorce certificates like the marriage certificates there. No way am I risking anything going there again with my daughter
 
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AnnaC

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He sent you money for a plane ticket? How much money did he send? Cash it, say thanks and use it toward a lawyer in Canada to get that divorce and forget about what they are doing or where they are living or if they are together.

Sorry if I sound harsh.
 
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Isabellalynn

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Feb 8, 2012
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Yes he sent me money, $600 cdn. He keeps telling me how sorry he is about cheating on me with this girl. However I feel there is more than this one girl, it is just he got caught because he has a baby with her, how many others were there? It does not really matter to me I cannot dwell on it, or else I will go crazy! (Like I am not crazy now LOL).
I just want him to leave me alone. I don't know why he wants me there, he says he loves me but, that is not love, you can't be with other women and tell me you love me, nonono!
And no it did not sound harsh!
 
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KenoshaChris

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Geez, divorce him in Canada and stop all of the drama. Explain to your daughter sometime in the future. I've only been an attorney for like 30 years. How simple is that answer?
 
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