Custody of wife's nephew

A

AndrewDR

New member
Mar 30, 2011
15
0
0
Hello DR1 Legal readers,

Not sure if anyone can help me with this but thought I would give it a shot.

History: A am an American married to a Dominican gal. We have been together almost 6 years and have a 18 month old son. We currently live in Oregon, USA. She is in the DR for the holidays.

One of my wife's female cousins has a son with a Dominican born US citizen (Lives in NY). As far as i know he has never sent money to help take care of him. The kid is now 16. When he was about 14 she let his father bring him to the US and enroll him in school. Less than 2 years later, the father brings the kid back to the DR on a "vacation" (in April 2012) and leaves him there taking the kids passport, green card and all other docs back with him to the US. He again, has not sent a dime since leaving him in the DR and refuses to give back his documents.

The kid claims the dad was abusive physically and verbally. The father lives with another woman but is collecting benefits for being a single father. I think he just brought him there to get him a social security number to claim him as a dependent on taxes and get social services for being a single parent. I know this kid and he always was happy and had stuff to say. I called him every couple months when he lived in NY with his dad and he was completely different. He hardly spoke and sounded sad. My wife found out later that his dad was there listening to the phone calls making sure he didnt say anything that would cause problems.

Goal/Questions: I would like to have the kid come live with me in Oregon without the fathers knowledge. How do we go about getting his docs back, or getting new ones? Can the mother of the kid give some sort of legal custody to my wife without the fathers knowledge? Would that custody be valid in the US? If not, Can she file for child support against the father?

I do not think that I would try to charge his father of being abusive or cheating the government. I just want to get him here and ill take care of him until he turns 18. Then let the son decide what he wants to do.

I am more than happy to answer any further questions you may have in the effort to better this situation.

Sincerely,

Andrew
 
D

donluis99

Bronze
Jul 12, 2004
721
16
0
Considering the kids age and the father is not a custorial parent, report it to the police as stolen and whom stole it, he either return or be prosucuted or the very least with the police report you can apply for new docs.

g'luck
 
J

jafo

New member
Dec 16, 2006
110
2
0
If the child wishes to return to the US .
And its a big IF.
If he is a permanent resident all he has to do is get a Police report and go to the consulate , say documents were stolen, or lost.

As far as the Father. One can never tell.

But the boy is 16 now . Has missed almost a full year of school.

Will he be capable of competing High School ?

You will need documentation from his previous school.

While i am sure you have noble intentions. The boy is going to need more care than till he is just 18.

What happens then , there not an over abundance of jobs out there , for young men with little or no education .

I truly wish you the best of luck.

But don't be surprised if a year from now , you say to yourself.
No good deed goes unpunished.
 
U

USEmbassy

New member
Oct 31, 2012
2
0
0
Hello Andrew,<O:p</O:p
<O:p
Minor applicants who are 16 or 17 can apply for an adult passport on their own. The interviewing consular officer may request the consent of one parent. In this case, we would suggest that the mother attend the interview with her son. The old passport would be considered lost and would be canceled.

<O:pThe mother could pursue custody and child support in the U.S. (in the state where the father lives) by hiring a U.S. based lawyer. The lawyer could also advise you on the possibility of becoming the child’s guardian. Without being his legal guardian, it would be hard for you to register him for school or seek medical care, for example.

We hope this response is helpful. Please visit our website for further information. In particular, the section on Adult In-person passport renewal (age 16 and older) provides instructions on how to proceed.

<O:p[URL]http://santodomingo.usembassy.gov/passports_dr-e.html
[/URL]
Sincerely,
<O:pPublic Liaison Officer<O:p
U.S. Embassy in Santo Domingo<O:p
 
Last edited:
A

AndrewDR

New member
Mar 30, 2011
15
0
0
Thank you very much for all of your responses and insight. After looking into this a little more I actually think the child should be a US citizen being he is under 18 and his father is a naturalized citizen. He should automatically get it. Meaning all he needs to do is get a new passport and a ticket to come home. Much easier than getting the new green card.

As to taking care of the child, I am not concerned about that. Either way, the father is financially liable for his care for 10 years. I am almost certain he had to sign a 10 year contract with the US government to support the child when he was allowed into the US. Even when he turns 18, his father will still be on the hook.


USEmbassy: What would they need to bring to find out if in fact his US Citizenship was granted? I am not sure if he ever had a US Passport so I will check both frist time and renewal. I will contact a child support lawyer today and update on progress.

Thanks agian,

Andrew
 
Last edited:
L

La Rubia

Bronze
Jan 1, 2010
1,336
28
0
AndrewDR said:
He again, has not sent a dime since leaving him in the DR and refuses to give back his documents. If there isn't a court order, he doesn't have to give them back. Persue replacement as suggested by others. Legally, he also doesn't have to provide support unless there was a court order. (morally, of course, another thing.)

The father lives with another woman but is collecting benefits for being a single father. I think he just brought him there to get him a social security number to claim him as a dependent on taxes and get social services for being a single parent. This is plain wrong, and should be reported.

Goal/Questions: I would like to have the kid come live with me in Oregon without the fathers knowledge. How do we go about getting his docs back, or getting new ones? Can the mother of the kid give some sort of legal custody to my wife without the fathers knowledge? Would that custody be valid in the US? If not, Can she file for child support against the father? Mother can give away her rights, can't give away Dad's. As unfair as the situation is, it's never a good idea to try to break the law in order to correct what has happened. Also, on the support, don't mix the issues. You are saying, if she can't get custody should she sue for support. They are separate in the eyes of most state courts in the US (ie you can't legally stop a father from seeing the child if he's behind on child support, and you can't stop paying child support because you can't see the child.) She should have sued for support when he dropped him off, which is when it seems he stopped providing for him. And even if the Dad isn't seeing him, he doesn't have to give up his rights to custody. If this came to court, dad would surely claim mother prevented him from seeing the child.

I do not think that I would try to charge his father of being abusive or cheating the government. The abuse angle is likely not possible, unless documentation in the form of pictures was taken. Verbal abuse in itself is not really prosecutable. Cheating the government, hell yes, I'd try a couple of letters at least.I just want to get him here and ill take care of him until he turns 18. Then let the son decide what he wants to do.As an American citizen, child will soon be able to make that decision on his own. Given that paperwork takes time, best thing you may be able to do for him right now is pay for him to be in a good school and/or tutoring to make up for lost time, and English classes. He'll be better prepared for life in the US when he gets there, because he'll get there sooner than you think.

Andrew
Click to expand...

It's always sad to see children caught in the middle. Seems that 16 is close enough that he'll be able to fix it himself, faster than you can on his behalf.

Best of luck to you and your family.
 
L

La Rubia

Bronze
Jan 1, 2010
1,336
28
0
AndrewDR said:
As to taking care of the child, I am not concerned about that. Either way, the father is financially liable for his care for 10 years. I am almost certain he had to sign a 10 year contract with the US government to support the child when he was allowed into the US. Even when he turns 18, his father will still be on the hook.
Click to expand...

Is this the case, and is it ever enforced?
 
A

AndrewDR

New member
Mar 30, 2011
15
0
0
I am pretty damn sure this is the case, and I dont know if it is enforced but im sure it would be. When anyone brings someone to the US that is not at the time a US Citizen, as a petitioner, they have to provide proof of income and a 10 year contract that says they will be financially responsible for the person for 10 years. This is non-revokable. It goes to the extent to say that the government can seize your assets to pay for their care if you do not do it willingly.
 
P

pollogringo

Gold
Dec 26, 2011
8,071
0
0
AndrewDR said:
I am pretty damn sure this is the case, and I dont know if it is enforced but im sure it would be. When anyone brings someone to the US that is not at the time a US Citizen, as a petitioner, they have to provide proof of income and a 10 year contract that says they will be financially responsible for the person for 10 years. This is non-revokable. It goes to the extent to say that the government can seize your assets to pay for their care if you do not do it willingly.
Click to expand...

And if there are no assets to seize? No wages to garnish?
 
A

AndrewDR

New member
Mar 30, 2011
15
0
0
he has flown back and forth between the US and DR 3 times since April... He has to be getting it from somewhere.
 
bronzeallspice

bronzeallspice

Live everyday like it's your last
Mar 26, 2012
11,009
2
38
There must have been a reason as to why the father just put his son on an airplane
and took the kid back to the DR.This kid just came to live with his father at age 14?
It's not easy raising teenagers and maybe there was friction between the two.The
father putting down the rules and the son wanting to do his own thing,sound familiar?

I suggest you speak with the father,if you can, and find out the reason why he sent
his son back to live with his mother.Otherwise,you will find yourself in a situation
you will regret later on.
 
bronzeallspice

bronzeallspice

Live everyday like it's your last
Mar 26, 2012
11,009
2
38
Derfish said:
OP has all ready stated that he was an abusive father. Ther really are such things. I've known a few over the decades. I'd believe her on that instead of assuming the kid is bad.
Click to expand...

If he was abusive,why did the mother send him to live with the father?

There's two sides to every story.
 
bronzeallspice

bronzeallspice

Live everyday like it's your last
Mar 26, 2012
11,009
2
38
pollogringo said:
She didn't know he was abusive until after the fact?
Click to expand...

Really?? and all because of what the kid told her? I still say the OP needs to speak with the
father.Sometimes when a parent disciplines a child it is looked on as abuse.
 
bronzeallspice

bronzeallspice

Live everyday like it's your last
Mar 26, 2012
11,009
2
38
pollogringo said:
Absolutely. But ask the father? Will he admit to being abusive?
Click to expand...

But the mother will have an idea as to what the cause of the abuse allegations is all about.

But that is for the OP to determine.

I wonder why the mother decided to give the father custody of the son at age 14?
Could it be, she herself was having problems with him?
 
Last edited:
P

pollogringo

Gold
Dec 26, 2011
8,071
0
0
bronzeallspice said:
But the mother will have an idea as to what the cause of the abuse allegations is all about.

But that is for the OP to determine.
Click to expand...

My ex and I have had to consult to check the veracity of our son's stories. But he's never lied to me about her nor lied to her about me. My nephews being raised by their Dominican father complain that he's unreasonable, strict and they "hate" him. LOL. But they've never accused him of abuse and he's never abandoned them. I tend to believe children when they claim abuse. The father's character is already in question due to his history of non-support and the confiscation of his son's documents. They were not his to keep. And then there's the fact that he dropped the kid like a hot potato. A real man doesn't do that.
 
bronzeallspice

bronzeallspice

Live everyday like it's your last
Mar 26, 2012
11,009
2
38
pollogringo said:
My ex and I have had to consult to check the veracity of our son's stories. But he's never lied to me about her nor lied to her about me. My nephews being raised by their Dominican father complain that he's unreasonable, strict and they "hate" him. LOL. But they've never accused him of abuse and he's never abandoned them. I tend to believe children when they claim abuse. The father's character is already in question due to his history of non-support and the confiscation of his son's documents. They were not his to keep. And then there's the fact that he dropped the kid like a hot potato. A real man doesn't do that.
Click to expand...

Exactly the reason why I said for the OP to speak with the father,because I find it hard to believe
that after two years,he just dropped him like a hot potato.

Anything could've happened.Maybe they physically fought?
 
P

pollogringo

Gold
Dec 26, 2011
8,071
0
0
bronzeallspice said:
Exactly the reason why I said for the OP to speak with the father,because I find it hard to believe
that after two years,he just dropped him like a hot potato.
Click to expand...

How many Dominican sperm donors do you know? Abandonment of progeny is not unheard of in the culture.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom