Really ****ty DR day!

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potus

Active member
Dec 27, 2015
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Really ****ty DR day!

I hope all else are doing better.......My wife disclosed to me yesterday that she will be leaving our household with the Kids (7/10/17 (17 year old was adopted by us at the age of 7)) soon. My mother in law disclosed to me that my wife signed a new lease on a new house today. Coming home today I see a lot of things of the house missing already.
I spoke to our attorney and she said that the wife is acting in accordance with the law.........she also commentted that she can not understand that the wife made such a dicision without making an agreement first.
I have never been violent or abusive towards any family member of mine.
I covered 100% of all costs of living during all the years......happily so.
Attorney said there is nothing I can do unless I take legal steps and then seek assistance from a judge who will mostlikely rule with her anyway since I am a male foreigner.
Appointment time can take 3 to 4 month during which she can withhold visitation rights.
Sorry, just venting here and maybe provide some info of use.......
 

AnnaC

Gold
Jan 2, 2002
16,050
418
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I'm really sorry to hear this. It's tough especially whe you are in a foreign country. Did you get a pre-nup?
 

dv8

Gold
Sep 27, 2006
31,266
363
0
sorry to hear that. hold on and stay strong. definitely go a legal route with her to establish alimony and visiting rights. good luck!
 

zoomzx11

Gold
Jan 21, 2006
8,367
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113
You are in a temporary terrible space. It's checkmate but it will pass so long as you do not do anything foolish. Your wife has a lawyer, is acting legally and there is nothing you can do but acquiesce. Now figure out the best deal possible between you two ,and be nice. You may well look back at this as a positive thing in the long run. Mrs. wonderful best thing that ever happened, light you up, is around the corner. You get up and go. Just my thoughts. Good luck.
 

keepcoming

Moderator - Living & General Stuff
May 25, 2011
4,734
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So sorry to hear your going through this. Do the right thing by the your children (they are what matter most) and the rest will work out. Sometimes it is better not to dwell on why even though I know it is hard. Speak with a attorney most definitely. Keep positive!!! Good Luck.
 

Ecoman1949

Born to Ride.
Oct 17, 2015
2,806
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Sorry to hear about your current situation. I had to deal with this years ago, although in my case no children were involved. If they want to go, they will go. Took me a while to come to terms with that and you will eventually. 

My questions for other posters. Do pre-nuptial agreements actually exist in the DR, and do they hold up in court? More to the point would any DR woman sign one? I'd be interested in hearing from a poster that had one that worked during a separation or divorce in the DR.
 

Chirimoya

Well-known member
Dec 9, 2002
17,850
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There is "separación de bienes" where both partners' assets remain their separate property and neither has a right to the other's if they should divorce.
 

dv8

Gold
Sep 27, 2006
31,266
363
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we have separacion de bienes but i don't know how does it stand in court since we are still married :)
 

ExDR

Member
Jul 31, 2014
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hey Potus, sorry to hear what's going on with you. I went through a bitter divorce and I am just now getting to the point where I don't hate her anymore. It's 50-50 on the property. so you should discuss what she takes and what you keep. No use fighting it, it's happening. Save your money. Seeing the kids should not be a problem going forward since you were not a bad guy. The feeling will go away, I promise and you will go on wit your life. Just curious, is she older than 40? B/C that is when menopause starts and it can make them do crazy things. I had to educate myself about it or would have had a second divorce. Good luck to you.
 

jd_mine

Active member
Sep 24, 2003
166
101
43
t's 50-50 on the property. so you should discuss what she takes and what you keep. No use fighting it, it's happening.



Is it also 50/50 on the debt? My wife has a hard time understanding this concept.
 

cbmitch9

Bronze
Nov 3, 2010
845
8
18
Really ****ty DR day!

I hope all else are doing better.......My wife disclosed to me yesterday that she will be leaving our household with the Kids (7/10/17 (17 year old was adopted by us at the age of 7)) soon. My mother in law disclosed to me that my wife signed a new lease on a new house today. Coming home today I see a lot of things of the house missing already.
I spoke to our attorney and she said that the wife is acting in accordance with the law.........she also commentted that she can not understand that the wife made such a dicision without making an agreement first.
I have never been violent or abusive towards any family member of mine.
I covered 100% of all costs of living during all the years......happily so.
Attorney said there is nothing I can do unless I take legal steps and then seek assistance from a judge who will mostlikely rule with her anyway since I am a male foreigner.
Appointment time can take 3 to 4 month during which she can withhold visitation rights.
Sorry, just venting here and maybe provide some info of use.......

Sorry to hear about your situation. It may sound cliche right now but, things will get better.
 

Ecoman1949

Born to Ride.
Oct 17, 2015
2,806
1,309
113
hey Potus, sorry to hear what's going on with you. I went through a bitter divorce and I am just now getting to the point where I don't hate her anymore. It's 50-50 on the property. so you should discuss what she takes and what you keep. No use fighting it, it's happening. Save your money. Seeing the kids should not be a problem going forward since you were not a bad guy. The feeling will go away, I promise and you will go on wit your life. Just curious, is she older than 40? B/C that is when menopause starts and it can make them do crazy things. I had to educate myself about it or would have had a second divorce. Good luck to you.

"Getting to the point where I don't hate her anymore". I like that. Took 13 years for my ex wife and I to become friends. Now I laugh about it. Tell friends I lost 150 lbs. when I divorced. 120 of that was her. Friends ask if I miss my exwife. I say no but I miss my dog. Probably going to hell for that but I laugh anyway. 
 

Matilda

RIP Lindsay
Sep 13, 2006
5,485
338
63
Just curious, is she older than 40? B/C that is when menopause starts and it can make them do crazy things.

Firstly Potus very sorry about what you are going through, but as other posters have said there is always light at the end of the tunnel.

And to ExDR - you made me howl with laughter. So the menopause can make "them" do crazy things. Too darn right. I left my ex husband when I was 43 I think. Sod all to do with the menopause, simply "I couldn't stand his sh*t any more"! And time to live my life for me.

Matilda
 

irishpaddy

Bronze
Sep 3, 2013
1,166
460
83
"Getting to the point where I don't hate her anymore". I like that. Took 13 years for my ex wife and I to become friends. Now I laugh about it. Tell friends I lost 150 lbs. when I divorced. 120 of that was her. Friends ask if I miss my exwife. I say no but I miss my dog. Probably going to hell for that but I laugh anyway. 

a dog is always loyal and happy to see you ...not a wife
 

mofongoloco

Silver
Feb 7, 2013
3,002
9
38
Good luck. Don't do ANYTHING stupid. Don't deny the kids anything they need. Don't ever impune her integrity or question where and how she spends the money you provide for the support of your children. Be careful.  Good luck.  Most importantly, try your best to nit let this affect your children.  Acknowledge that is does, but do yoUr best.  
 
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