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Thread: Newfie Joke

  1. #1
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    Default Newfie Joke

    The Penis Study

    Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the head of
    a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two years and cost
    over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason the head of a man's
    penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the man with more pleasure
    during sex.
    After the results were published, the French declared that the British were
    wrong and decided to conduct their own study of the same subject. After
    three years of research and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded
    that the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman
    with more sexual pleasure.
    When the results of the French study were released, Newfoundland decided to
    conduct its own study. So, after nearly three weeks of intensive research
    and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's study was complete. They came to the
    conclusion that the reason the head of a man's penis is
    larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand from flying off and hitting him
    in the forehead.

  2. #2
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    Talking Now "THAT" is funny!!!!!!!and I should know!

    Best one I have seen yet!CRISCO

  3. #3
    LiVe ThE LiFe YoU iMaGiNeD
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    Good one Sli I'm glad to see that joke on here!!!! Hee, hee...
    Best Canadian joke on here yet!

  4. #4
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    Default Bravo!



    I really LOLAROTFLMAO!!!!

    HB..

  5. #5
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    Default Addendum to Newfie joke...blonde Newfie???

    The Blonde and the Condoms

    Bambi, a stunning blonde, was worried about the
    HIV crisis. She walked into a drugstore and
    purchased a pack of condoms.

    "That will be $1.08, please," said the clerk.

    "What's the 8 cents for?" asked the blonde.
    "It says one dollar right here on the packaging."

    "Tax," replied the clerk.

    "Gee", Bambi said, "I thought you just rolled
    them on and they stayed there. Where do you
    tack them?"

    HB

  6. #6
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    Cool I have a good idea where to tack them...


  7. #7
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    Default

    Ok while we're on the subject,
    There's an Italian, French, Newfie men disgussing what pleases their women.
    The Italian says, I put chocolate on my woman's body then I licked it off...."IT DRIVES HER CRAZY"
    The French man says I put feather on her body then blow on them softly......."IT DRIVES HER CRAZY"
    The Newfie says, after I make love to my woman I wipe my dick on the curtains..."IT DRIVES HER CRAZY"

  8. #8
    "an unexamined life is not worth living"
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    Talking lol

    Ana, I laughed so hard that the ice tea I was drinking went up my nose.

  9. #9
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    Default

    CLASSES FOR MEN AT COMMUNITY ADULT LEARNING CENTER *SIGN UP BY June 25TH

    NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR
    CONTENTS, EACH COURSE WILL ACCEPT A MAXIMUM OF 8 PARTICIPANTS.

    TOPIC 1- HOW TO FILL UP THE ICE CUBE TRAYS. STEP BY STEP,
    WITH SLIDE PRESENTATION.

    TOPIC 2 - THE TOILET PAPER ROLL: DO THEY GROW ON HOLDERS?
    ROUND TABLE DISCUSSION.

    TOPIC 3 - IS IT POSSIBLE TO URINATE USING THE TECHNIQUE OF
    LIFTING THE SEAT AND AVOIDING THE FLOOR/WALLS AND NEARBY BATHTUB? GROUP PRACTICE.

    TOPIC 4 - FUNDAMENTAL DIFFERENCES BETWEEN THE LAUNDRY
    BASKET AND THE FLOOR. PICTURES AND EXPLANATORY GRAPHICS.

    TOPIC 5 - AFTER DINNER DISHES AND SILVERWARE: CAN THEY
    LEVITATE AND FLY INTO THE KITCHEN SINK? EXAMPLES ON VIDEO.

    TOPIC 6 - LOSS OF IDENTITY: LOSING THE REMOTE TO YOUR
    SIGNIFICANT OTHER. HELPLINE SUPPORT AND SUPPORT GROUPS.

    TOPIC 7 - LEARNING HOW TO FIND THINGS, STARTING WITH
    LOOKING IN THE RIGHT PLACE INSTEAD OF TURNING THE HOUSE UPSIDE DOWN WHILE SCREAMING. OPEN FORUM.

    TOPIC 8 - HEALTH WATCH: BRINGING HER FLOWERS IS NOT HARMFUL TO YOUR HEALTH. GRAPHICS AND AUDIO TAPE.

    TOPIC 9 - REAL MEN ASK FOR DIRECTIONS WHEN LOST. REAL LIFE
    TESTIMONIALS.

    TOPIC 10 - IS IT GENETICALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO SIT QUIETLY AS
    SHE PARALLEL PARKS? DRIVING SIMULATION.

    TOPIC 11 - LEARNING TO LIVE: BASIC DIFFERENCES BETWEEN
    MOTHER AND WIFE. ONLINE CLASS AND ROLE PLAYING.

    TOPIC 12 - HOW TO BE THE IDEAL SHOPPING COMPANION.
    RELAXATION EXERCISES, MEDITATION AND BREATHING TECHNIQUES.

    TOPIC 13 - HOW TO FIGHT CEREBRAL ATROPHY: REMEMBERING
    BIRTHDAYS, ANNIVERSARIES, OTHER IMPORTANT DATES AND CALLING WHEN YOU'RE GOING TO BE LATE. CEREBRAL SHOCK THERAPY SESSIONS AND FULL LOBOTOMIES OFFERED.

    UPON COMPLETION OF THE COURSE, DIPLOMAS WILL BE PRESENTED TO SURVIVORS.

  10. #10
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    Sli,

    Good thing we newfie's do not take offence to these jokes! Santos Dios, who would have thought that I would have seen a thread posted Newfie Joke on this board. Just back from 2 weeks in Punta Cana, so I did not have a chance to read the threads, but could not resist responding to this one.

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