A blonde had just totaled her car in a horrific accident.
Miraculously, she managed to pry herself from the wreckage
without a scratch and was applying fresh lipstick when the
state trooper arrived. "My God!" the trooper gasped. "Your
car looks like an accordion that was stomped on by an
elephant. "Are you OK ma'am?" "Why, yes, officer, I'm just
fine" the blonde chirped. "Well, how in the world did this
happen?" the officer asked as he surveyed the wrecked car.
"Officer, it was the strangest thing!" the blonde began. "I
was driving along this road when from out of nowhere this tree
pops up in front of me. So I swerved to the right, and there
was another tree! I swerved to the left and there was another
tree! I swerved to the right and there was another tree! I
swerved to the left and there was..."Uh, ma'am, 'the officer
said, cutting her off, "There isn't a tree on this road for 30
miles. That was your air freshener swinging back and forth."
A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so
she goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment
unexpectedly and when she opens the door, she finds him
in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blonde is really
angry. She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as
she does so, she is overcome with grief. She takes the
gun and puts it to her own head. The boyfriend yells, "No,
honey, don't do it." The blonde replies, "Shut up, you're
next!"
A blonde has been out of work for two years and is desperate for money. She decides on a kidnap & ransom scheme to raise some quick cash. So she goes to the park and hangs around the playground looking for the best-dressed kid. Then, she gets the kid to come over to the bench where she's sitting and she pins a note to him. The note says "To the mother of this little boy. I'll need fifty thousand dollars ransom if you want to see him unharmed again. Put the money in a bag on the park bench next to the playground by tomorrow at five o' clock." She signs the note "A desperate blonde." Then she sends the kid back onto the playground.
Next day, about five o'clock, the blonde returns and, sure enough, there's a bag with $50,000 on the bench with a note pinned to it. The note says "Here's the money you demanded. Now, I've got just three things to say to you. One, I hope that you did nothing to upset my little boy. Two, I hope this money will keep you from doing this again to another innocent child. And three, I can't believe a blonde would do this to another blonde."
Miraculously, she managed to pry herself from the wreckage
without a scratch and was applying fresh lipstick when the
state trooper arrived. "My God!" the trooper gasped. "Your
car looks like an accordion that was stomped on by an
elephant. "Are you OK ma'am?" "Why, yes, officer, I'm just
fine" the blonde chirped. "Well, how in the world did this
happen?" the officer asked as he surveyed the wrecked car.
"Officer, it was the strangest thing!" the blonde began. "I
was driving along this road when from out of nowhere this tree
pops up in front of me. So I swerved to the right, and there
was another tree! I swerved to the left and there was another
tree! I swerved to the right and there was another tree! I
swerved to the left and there was..."Uh, ma'am, 'the officer
said, cutting her off, "There isn't a tree on this road for 30
miles. That was your air freshener swinging back and forth."
A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so
she goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment
unexpectedly and when she opens the door, she finds him
in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blonde is really
angry. She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as
she does so, she is overcome with grief. She takes the
gun and puts it to her own head. The boyfriend yells, "No,
honey, don't do it." The blonde replies, "Shut up, you're
next!"
A blonde has been out of work for two years and is desperate for money. She decides on a kidnap & ransom scheme to raise some quick cash. So she goes to the park and hangs around the playground looking for the best-dressed kid. Then, she gets the kid to come over to the bench where she's sitting and she pins a note to him. The note says "To the mother of this little boy. I'll need fifty thousand dollars ransom if you want to see him unharmed again. Put the money in a bag on the park bench next to the playground by tomorrow at five o' clock." She signs the note "A desperate blonde." Then she sends the kid back onto the playground.
Next day, about five o'clock, the blonde returns and, sure enough, there's a bag with $50,000 on the bench with a note pinned to it. The note says "Here's the money you demanded. Now, I've got just three things to say to you. One, I hope that you did nothing to upset my little boy. Two, I hope this money will keep you from doing this again to another innocent child. And three, I can't believe a blonde would do this to another blonde."
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