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Thread: MQ aint no blonde!~

  1. #1
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    Default MQ aint no blonde!~

    OVERWEIGHT BLONDE

    A blonde is overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet.
    "I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and repeat
    this procedure for two weeks.
    The next time I see you, you'll have lost at least five pounds.

    When the blonde returns, she's lost nearly 20 pounds.

    "Why, that's amazing!" the doctor says. "Did you
    follow my instructions?"

    The blonde nods. "I'll tell you, though, I thought

    I was going to drop dead by the third day. "From hunger, you mean?"
    asked the doctor.

    "No, from all that skipping."
    ______________________
    RIVER WALK

    There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a
    river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank.

    "Yoo-hoo" she shouts, "how can I get to the other side?"

    The second blonde looks up the river then down the
    river then shouts back, "You are on the other side."
    _____________________

    KNITTING

    A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway.
    Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde
    behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his
    flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned
    on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULLOVER! "NO," the blonde yelled back,
    "IT'S A SCARF!"
    ________________
    BLONDE ON THE SUN

    A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day.
    The Russian said, "We were the first in space!" The American said, "We
    were the first on the moon!" The Blonde said, "So what, we're going to
    be the first on the sun!"

    The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their
    heads.

    "You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the
    Russian.

    To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're
    going at night!"

    _______________
    SPEEDING TICKET

    A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely
    if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would
    get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then
    today you expect me to show it to you!"
    ___________

  2. #2
    Miami Nice!
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    Jazzy...how come all the joke dedications?

    These were pretty funny, I must say...especially the first one!

  3. #3
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    I am trying to give you that sense of humor you lacked in that other thread when I said you were a drunk.

  4. #4
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    Default MQ doesnt need to be blond

    With her sweet smile and looks, blonde is not a necesity, she can come see me anytime.
    MQ regards from the Wud!

  5. #5
    Miami Nice!
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    Hey, Wud...thanks!!!

    I needed that...it's been kind of like a "blue" Friday...and it doesn't look like it's gonna get any better...
    Tonight I'm babysitting my nephew while my sister goes to have dinner with her in-laws...
    Tomorrow 6-10 a.m. on the air, from 1-3 I have a special appearance at a mall, and then ar 4 a friend's wedding...
    On Sunday, another special appearance at another mall 1-3...

    I NEED A LIFE!!! Could someone start a "Musicqueen move to the DR Fund" or something like that?

    I'll appreciate all the help! Thanks!

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