Funny for the Census

Hillbilly

Moderator
Jan 1, 2002
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Making The Most Of Your Teen Pregnancy


Hey, girls! Pregnancy is a great
way to keep your boyfriend and get
lots of attention, but it's also a
big responsibility. Here are some
tips to get you through those nine
months.

* Plan ahead! You don't want your expectancy date to coincide with prom or homecoming.

* Drink lots of water. This will flush the alcohol and drugs right
out of your system before it reaches your baby.

* Be prepared! Make sure you purchase the latest styles of cool,
fashionable Nike athletic shoes for your baby ahead of time.

* Make sure all your teachers know you are pregnant, so they will have reduced expectations for you, allowing you to skate through junior high.

* Take care of little details early. Make sure you get your driver's
license in case you have to take yourself to the hospital when you go into labor.

* If someone expresses disapproval that
you are having a baby at such an early
age, get "in their face" with lots of
sassy "attitude." A key phrase to
remember: "Nobody gonna tell me how
to raise my baby."

* Remember to eat often (every three to
four hours) when you're pregnant--
even if you'd rather spend your money
on CDs and clothes rather than candy
bars and chips.

* Smoking while pregnant can result in lower birth weight for your newborn, making it smaller and easier to pass through the birth canal.

* Be the envy of your friends
by thinking up the coolest
baby name ever. Viripulus
Equinox or Shaniatwaine are some great examples.
'--'


HB:)