chinese proverbs

Escott

Gold
Jan 14, 2002
7,716
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www.escottinsosua.blogspot.com
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Virginity like bubble, one prick, all gone.
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Man who run in front of car get tired.
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Man who run behind car get exhausted.
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Foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife
upright organ.
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Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going
to Bangkok.
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Man with one chopstick go hungry.
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Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernails.
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Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.
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Baseball is wrong: man with four balls cannot walk.
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War does not determine who is right, war determine who is
left.
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Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cat house.
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Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.
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It take many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it.
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Man who drive like hell, bound to get there.
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Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.
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Man who live in glass house should change clothes in
basement.
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Man who fish in other man's well often catch crabs.
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Man who fart in church sit in own pew.
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Crowded elevator smell different to midget.
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Criss Colon

Platinum
Jan 2, 2002
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Remember the old "Book & Author" (dare I say "JOKES"?)

"The Yellow River",by I.P.Freely
"Open Kimono"by Semore Hare
"Under The Granstand"by I.C. Butts
"Antlers In The Treetops"by Who Goosed the Moose
"Spots On The Great Wall" by Who Flung Poo

Those are the "Best of the Worst"!Criss Colon
 

chicker

New member
Jan 1, 2002
301
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"Race to the Outhouse" by Willie Maykit
illustrations by Betty Dohnt

"Fidelity in Marriage" by Noah Fairs


hmmmm, I know there's more


Duck who fly upside down bound to quack up.
 

Eddy

Silver
Jan 1, 2002
3,668
219
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"The Golden Stream" by I.P. Yellow
"The ruptured chinaman" by Wonghung-Lo
I'll do better next time. Promise
 

Criss Colon

Platinum
Jan 2, 2002
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Did you hear about?????????????

Did You Hear about???????
The two gay boxers?They went into the locker room and "Exchanged Blows"!!!!
The Happy Roman?..... Gladheateher"!!!!
The prostitute who sat on the Judges lap?...He gave her an "Honorable Discharge"!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The gay "Nazi",he "Ateoff" Hitler!!!!!
The prostitute with a colostomy?... She made a little money"On the side"!!!!!!
The American Politician(Bill Clinton I Bet!)He went around kissing babies,....Before they were born"!!!!!

"Somebody Paaaleeez Stop ME!!!!!!!!
Cris Colon,digging deep into my "Funny Bone"!


;) :confused:
 

Eddy

Silver
Jan 1, 2002
3,668
219
0
What's the difference between an epileptic oyster chucker and a prostitute with diareea?
The oyster chucker chucks between fits.

What's the difference between a carnival side show and a burlesque show?
The carnival side show is a cunning array of stunts.

Stop me someone.
 

Criss Colon

Platinum
Jan 2, 2002
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Whats the difference between Mashed Potatoes & Pea Soup??

Most people can "Mash Potatoes"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Did you hear about the Dehydrated Frenchman?..."PeeAir"

Why was the ground white at the "Little Bighorn"?...."Those phucking Indians just kept "Coming & Coming"!!!!!!!!

What is Grey,and comes in quarts???...Elephants!!!!

What is Black,and comes in White "Boxes"?...........SANKIS!!!!
Dominican Republic "Related" humor!!!!

"Take my wife,"PLEASE"!
I just flew in from Boston,.....and are my arms tired!!!!!

"Thank You very much,My names Cris,and you've been great"!!!
"Don't go away,Eddy,Mike,and The JazzMan are coming right up"!!!:cool:
 

Jon S.

Bronze
Jan 25, 2003
1,040
6
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Re: Whats the difference between Mashed Potatoes & Pea Soup??

Criss Colon said:


What is Black,and comes in White "Boxes"?...........SANKIS!!!!
Dominican Republic "Related" humor!!!!


Ha somebody stop him!!!! Ain't the truth a bitch..........
 

Negro Lindo

New member
Dec 26, 2002
246
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:0P

The Sankis one was pretty funny!


What's the difference between a lesbian and a trisquit?

One is a snack cracker



the other is a crack snacker.......
 

Criss Colon

Platinum
Jan 2, 2002
21,843
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Did you hear about the incestuous bear?

She layed her "PAW" on the table!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What do you call a man who makes dresses for pregnant women????................................a "Mother Frocker"!!!!!!!

What do you call bag boy at the soft drink store?..a "Coke Sacker"

What do you get when you cross a Mexican,with a "Gay" Eskimo???.....A "Snow Blower" that doesn't work"!!!!

What do you get when you cross a Puerto Rican,with a Dominican???....A Car Thief,that can't drive

and for all my Canadian Friends!the "one" I never leave out!!!
What is the difference between a Canadian,and a canoe???Sooner or later,a canoe "Tips"!!!!!!

What is the difference between an Italian Grandmother and a whale?.....50 pounds and a moustache!!!

What is the difference between a lesbian and an elephant?50 pounds and a pair of...."Burgenstock Sandals"!

Lets see now is there any group I need to still offend?.."Oh yes"!

How do you make a Jewish girl stop phucking?.......Marry Her!!!!



;) :cool: CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCc
 

chicker

New member
Jan 1, 2002
301
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What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
You can't hear an enzyme.

What's the definition of an italian virgin?
An ugly second grader.

What's another defintion of an italian virgin?
Any girl who can outrun her father.

In Greece, how do the separate the men from the boys?
With a crowbar.

What did the norwegian say after falling down the stairs?
I vunder vut all dat noise vuz about?

Jewish American Princess (JAP) riddles:

What's a JAP's favorite thing to make for dinner?
Reservations.

What's a JAP's faorite wine?
"I wanna go to Miamiiiii"

What's a JAP's idea of acceptable foreplay?
Two hours of begging.

OK, what does Irish foreplay sound like?
"Now, brace y'self, Kelly"


Thank you, thank you, remember there are three shows Saturday and four on Sunday. Dinner is not included. Thank you.
 

Criss Colon

Platinum
Jan 2, 2002
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How about a big DR1 round of applause for "MIKE" ladies & Germs?

Talking about Greece,what is the motto of the Greek Army??.."Never leave your buddy's BEHIND"!!!!!

Hormones you say???.Do you know how to Make a hormone?????...Don't pay her!!!!!

Jewish American Princess (JAP)you say?...What do you get when you cross a "JAP" with an Apple?...A Computer that wont "Go Down"!!!!

"Foreplay you say?

Australian Foreplay,...."Sheela I'm Home"!

British foreplay,...."You awake hun?"

Greek Foreplay,.."Roll over!"
 

mobrouser

Bronze
Jan 1, 2002
2,345
101
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Re: Did you hear about the incestuous bear?

Criss Colon said:
...and for all my Canadian Friends!the "one" I never leave out!!!....

hey criss, it's always better to have an assortment of jokes.

maybe you could alternate the "one" with the other big hit:

"why do Canadians always do it doggy style? so they can both watch the hockey game."

mob :classic:
(great game last night, ya gotta love overtime.)