Republican National Convention Schedule

Daniel W.

New member
Jan 20, 2003
104
0
0
Here is the new convention schedule...


>6:00pm - Opening prayer
>
>6:15pm - Supplementary opening prayer
>
>6:30pm - Prayer in thanks of first two prayers
>
>6:45pm - New energy policy presented by Exxon
>
>7:00pm - Canonization of Reagan
>
>7:15pm - Additional prayers
>
>7:30pm - Opening remarks by Halliburton
>
>8:00pm - Prayer for the safety and well-being of Ken "Kenny-boy" Lay
>
>8:15pm - Additional remarks by Halliburton
>
>8:30pm - Stoning of the first homosexual
>
>8:45pm - New healthcare polices presented by HMO leader, Kaiser
>Permanente
>
>9:00pm - Invasion of Iran or North Korea (TBA)
>
>9:15pm - Hallib urton contributes 1.4 billion to Republican party
>
>9:30pm - Reagan elevated to savior, Holy Trinity now referred to as "the
>
>quads"
>
>9:45pm - Bush undergoes plastic surgery to look more like Reagan
>
>10:00pm - Cheney runs into Ron Reagan, Jr. Tells him to go **** himself
>
>10:15pm - Recall of troops from accidental invasion of South Korea
>(Bush:>"Damn, the SOUTH is our ally. My bad mistake.")
>
>10:30pm - Burning at the stake of 16 year-old Jenny Williams, who had an
>
>illegal abortion after being raped by her cousin
>
>10:45pm - Dancing around the golden calf
>
>11:00pm - Stoning of the partner of the first homosexual
>
>11:15pm - New forestry policy presented by Weyerhaeuser
>
>11:45pm - Thanking God for his wisdom in choosing Bush as president
>
>12:00pm - Closing prayers (lasting until 2:00am)
>
>2:00 a m - Hookers arrive for all delegates
 

deelt

Bronze
Mar 23, 2004
987
2
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Funny! I think there's only one error. Bush never ever admits he's wrong and has made a mistake. He just thought the South Korea was SOUTH of where he was, not that it was a separate country. You know people in the states don't know a lick about geography...