Advice from ladies - how did you gently break it off?

ESOLteacher · May 4, 2005

Okay, sigh. This is no joke. Here is my dilemna, and although I am perfectly capable of working it out alone, I just thought I would ask for serious suggestions from kind women who have walked a mile in my shoes, and no comments are necessary from AZB and the like. (Tho he is very funny!)

Okay, um, let us just say that I have an atypical situation here. I went to the DR prepared to fend off tigres and animation guys (tho I did not visit an AI), and in focusing on that I was unprepared for a young sweet innocent and gentle guy. uhuh. Only after the fact did I learn how young and how innocent.

Are there any Accidental Cradle Robbers out there (female) who have found themselves gently explaining to their DR amigo why and how it will not work out long distance?

I know most readers will be tempted to barrage me with doubts about the sincerity of my "friend" and so forth and so on, but please trust me here - young christian son of evangelical christian mother - have met all family - speak Spanish better than they do - and so on, and so on.

So, my question, again, is directed at kind-hearted females who have successfully broken it off with a young, inexperienced, gentle soul. Could you please suggest how I might go about it?

To any other readers, please keep your doubts, jibes and negativity to a minimum.

Exhaling and preparing to hold up my garbage can lid as a shield. Thanks in advance to any kind replies. ESOL

ricktoronto · May 4, 2005

How about the truth? You are a little young and the distance is too far for us to have a meaningful relationship and I wish you the best but we will be apart starting.......now. Clean break, best wishes for the future with the right girl who you don't doubt he will find soon enough.

See? Us men can be thoughtful as well as serious if we are asked to ponder this type of issue (*).

(*) You could also say his penis is way too small.

ESOLteacher · May 4, 2005

Thanks Rick.

Thanks Rick - that was nice. and your joke was funny/comic relief.

Um, I think that ladies who have dated evangelical/christian dominican men may know of a twist that I can put on this to help him though it and help him stop fixing up his house for me to live in one day (not my idea!).

Thanks all.

p.s.
((Someone else asked, so I thought I would post it here that he is 22. Which is a LOT younger than I am.))

Ricardo900 · May 4, 2005

ricktoronto said:
How about the truth? You are a little young and the distance is too far for us to have a meaningful relationship and I wish you the best but we will be apart starting.......now. Clean break, best wishes for the future with the right girl who you don't doubt he will find soon enough.

See? Us men can be thoughtful as well as serious if we are asked to ponder this type of issue (*).

(*) You could also say his penis is way too small.

Now translate that into spanish and we got something
wait! I got an idea :classic:
How about a sticky on "how to dump your sankie or sankiette"

krissiebee · May 4, 2005

ESOLteacher said:
Thanks Rick - that was nice. and your joke was funny/comic relief.

Um, I think that ladies who have dated evangelical/christian dominican men may know of a twist that I can put on this to help him though it and help him stop fixing up his house for me to live in one day (not my idea!).

Thanks all.

p.s.
((Someone else asked, so I thought I would post it here that he is 22. Which is a LOT younger than I am.))

Um, why do you need to "help him through it"? He's 22! Evangelical or not, I'm sure he knows what a breakup is. And he will live through it. What "helps" in any breakup is the simple truth. I think ricktoronto's advice is great--"you're too young, I'm too far, it's not going to work, good luck to you." End of contact.

Will it suck for him? Yeah, probably. Will he get over it? Most definitely.

Kristina

MaineGirl · May 4, 2005

Christian, you say? Quote the Song of Solomon:

"Do not arouse or awaken love before the right time."

I could find the actual chapter/verse but not right this sec.

(Or you could find it in the "wisdom books" section of the old testament. After Paslms, Proverbs, and Ecclesiastes.)

xamaicano · May 4, 2005

krissiebee said:
Um, why do you need to "help him through it"? He's 22! Evangelical or not, I'm sure he knows what a breakup is. And he will live through it. What "helps" in any breakup is the simple truth. I think ricktoronto's advice is great--"you're too young, I'm too far, it's not going to work, good luck to you." End of contact.

Will it suck for him? Yeah, probably. Will he get over it? Most definitely.

Kristina

Exactly, a break up is a break up. He is Dominican, not Martian.

Music · May 4, 2005

I agree , just be honest and break up with him. Break ups always suck no matter how nice to try to break up with someone. He'll get over it we all have sometime or another no? It's part of life.

xamaicano said:
Exactly, a break up is a break up. He is Dominican, not Martian.

ESOLteacher · May 4, 2005

Ana you can close it now. Thanks!

Thanks. I got the information that I asked for. Take care everyone.

yvette · May 4, 2005

ESOLteacher said:
Um, I think that ladies who have dated evangelical/christian dominican men may know of a twist that I can put on this to help him though it and help him stop fixing up his house for me to live in one day (not my idea!).

Thanks all.

ESOLteacher,

You did not state if you are an evangelical/christian or not. If you are and you know that what you and he have done is not according to scripture, you can share with him I Corinthians 6:18,19. If you are not an evangelical/christian, you can tell him to read II Corinthians 6:14-18. You seem to care enough for him to want the best for him, I commend you for that.

Yvette

Chirimoya · May 4, 2005

Sankie in sheep's clothing

Reminds me of the time I was in a position to get sankified, many years ago on another Caribbean island. At the disco, all the tourist women were surrounded by the very sexy local version of sankies, except for me. Instead, I was cornered by the fresh-faced devout evangelical chappie - or at least that's what he claimed: I didn't stick around to find out whether it was just part of his pitch.

To the OP - you've been given good advice. Breaking off at long distance does have its advantages, in that you don't have to deal with much of the fallout.

ricktoronto · May 5, 2005

And it is probable his penis is way too small so if you don't want him to even want to come back call him "weenie weenie".(*)

(*) or "pequena pena"

mofi · May 5, 2005

22 Inexperienced???? Dr????- doubt it, but he's 22 he can take the truth

Dominican Babe · May 5, 2005

What a pathetic thread. For goodness sake, the guy is 22 not 12. Just tell him the truth and let him deal with it. It won't kill him.

shadInToronto · May 5, 2005

Teacher, Teacher, I know, I know

You could say something like this .... Little boy, you are a very smart student and are eager to move ahead in our class but, we aren't close to dealing with the subject of reproduction and 'the bird and the bees'. You just have to be patient until we're ready to deal with that advanced subject, meanwhile, you could practice on yourself.

There you've dealt with the issue in a professional manner. What do you think?

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