He wants to pay for everything

notion

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Oct 2, 2005
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Hi!
I recently met a guy from the Dominican Republic on a cruise ship. Allegedly he fell in love with me. I told him that there's no future for us because I don't have the money to come and see him and that time is also an issue.
He wants me to come back over christmas and is offering to pay for the cruise (at least ?1000 only for a cabin and food, drinks and tips would go extra). He says he would get me a cabin close to staff quarters and that he would invite me as his girlfriend which means that we could behave like a couple not like personell and guest.
I wonder whether he's a sankie though because of all this falling in love head over heels stuff.
I could imagine falling in love with him but I haven't yet, time was just too short. And reading about all this sankie-stuff now makes me doubt everything he said. Then again - he can't be after my money. I haven't got any and he knows that... Confusing!
Does he sound like a sankie to you?
 

gringagirly

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Mar 7, 2005
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sankette??

notion said:
Hi!
I recently met a guy from the Dominican Republic on a cruise ship. Allegedly he fell in love with me. I told him that there's no future for us because I don't have the money to come and see him and that time is also an issue.
He wants me to come back over christmas and is offering to pay for the cruise (at least ?1000 only for a cabin and food, drinks and tips would go extra). He says he would get me a cabin close to staff quarters and that he would invite me as his girlfriend which means that we could behave like a couple not like personell and guest.
I wonder whether he's a sankie though because of all this falling in love head over heels stuff.
I could imagine falling in love with him but I haven't yet, time was just too short. And reading about all this sankie-stuff now makes me doubt everything he said. Then again - he can't be after my money. I haven't got any and he knows that... Confusing!
Does he sound like a sankie to you?

You know, there are sankette's too!!
 

Ken

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Jan 1, 2002
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notion said:
I could imagine falling in love with him but I haven't yet, time was just too short. And reading about all this sankie-stuff now makes me doubt everything he said. Then again - he can't be after my money. I haven't got any and he knows that... Confusing!
Does he sound like a sankie to you?

No, but you sound like a sock puppet.
 

Nelly

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Jan 1, 2002
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Take him up on his "offer" and see if he really delivers. Tell him to send you the cash. hehe I have my doubts it will happen.
 

mountainfrog

On Vacation!
Dec 8, 2003
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www.domrep-info.com
A Frog's Notion

Dear "notion",
There is nothing wrong with accepting his invitation.
It may, however, not turn out to be as told. Staff on cruise ships are not allowed to demonstrate openly a liaison with a passenger.... Given that he is Dominican working in the tourist trade also adds to my doubts that his intentions are honest.
Beware, your nationality might be high on his priority list and
your getting him a visa could well make up for his investment in you.

M' frog

P.S.:
Thank you for registering with www..........de
 
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carina

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Mar 13, 2005
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True Mountainfrog...

Many of these guys consider,

1) In the long run you have more money than they have, even if you are not rich. Most of these guys aim to "get" tourists, they know they are not moviestars. They also know whatever money you have, it is more than them. If not now, then at a later stage in life.

2) Their goals are longterm, they want a visa/citizenship.
 

miguel

I didn't last long...
Jul 2, 2003
5,261
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Test him!

notion said:
Hi!
I recently met a guy from the Dominican Republic on a cruise ship. Allegedly he fell in love with me. I told him that there's no future for us because I don't have the money to come and see him and that time is also an issue.
He wants me to come back over christmas and is offering to pay for the cruise (at least §1000 only for a cabin and food, drinks and tips would go extra). He says he would get me a cabin close to staff quarters and that he would invite me as his girlfriend which means that we could behave like a couple not like personell and guest.
I wonder whether he's a sankie though because of all this falling in love head over heels stuff.
I could imagine falling in love with him but I haven't yet, time was just too short. And reading about all this sankie-stuff now makes me doubt everything he said. Then again - he can't be after my money. I haven't got any and he knows that... Confusing!
Does he sound like a sankie to you?
Since I am getting sick and tired of advising people on whether someone is a sankie/sankiette or not (well not really but it gets tiresome) all I will tell you is: TEST HIM!.

Tell him that if he wants you there, to pay for EVERTHING, including the drinks and tips. Tell him to send you the money ahead of time. See him run as if his axx was on fire.

Now, for YOU, let me ask you something and judge for yourself if he is sankie or not:

1- Why doesn't your head tells you that if he did this with you, that he is doing it with other girls that he meets?.

2- Nothing against you but: what's so special about you that this man would go "bonkers" over you and not any other girl on the cruise?. I you have that effect on men EVERYWHERE you go, then believe him and just consider that he works on a cruise an there's no doubts in my mind that he does the same to whomever he sees as an "easy target".

Let me tell you a little story and then you can make your own conclusions:

I know someone in Cancun, Mexico that once told me, while I was vacationing there: "Miguel, you are a very handsome man (yea dick, whatever) but I can get much more girls that you would ever dream of getting. On a slow weekend, I can score with about 10 different girls. I am on a eternal honeymoon!!!". When I asked him how was that possible being that he was a fat, short and ugly duckling (I swear I told him that, kiddingly but I meant it). He response was: I WORK ON A CRUISE SHIP and as long as there are desperate tourists who would believe anything that we tell them, there will always be jobs and women to be had for us ugly ducklings. Some of these morons do not understand that we are paid to show them a good time and make them feel happy. It does not matter how bad they look, we are supposed to say anything in order to make them feel like a million dollars!!!.

Now, do your own math.

Btw, why would you even consider going into a relationship with someone that works on a cruise ship knowing full well that you will not be able to see him often?. Why do you want to put yourself in a position where you will be wondering if he is with others (I say others because as SOME resort workers' sankies/sankiette, SOME swing both ways)?.

Save yourself some headaches and money down the line and leave everything as is and don't forget that to be in "lust" is not the same as being in love. Find someone in your own backyard.

Don't forget that a STD does not discriminate and you would be going to bed not only with him, but also with EVERY SINGLE PERSON that he went to bed with prior to you!. Think with your head and not your heart.

Good luck and I hope that you are not someone that we will tell: "WE TOLD YOU SO!!!!!".
 

AnnaC

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Jan 2, 2002
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Words are very nice and don't cost a thing but actions are much better.
 

notion

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Oct 2, 2005
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Hi all!
Yeah, you might be right in what you're saying. Maybe he's a sankie.
Thanks for taking the time to give me some advice.

Of course I have taken many of the things you said into consideration even before I knew about sankies.

The "why me" factor. Although I cannot complain about a lack of admirers I think you always have to ask yourself that question nevermind which country they're from. The world is full of liars who are only after one thing.
The contageous diseases problem. Also a thing that you really have to take into consideration all over the world these days.

The long distance relationship. I don't really mind that for a while as long as there's trust... Anyway allegedly he is not gonna sign a new contract after this one.

Uhm, I will see what happens.
Anna is right: Actions do speak louder than words! So if he is being sincere he's gonna have to prove that and really work for it.
I can be very stubborn if I put my mind to it! :D

Well thanks a lot again. I'll do my best to remain level-headed! ;)
notion
 

Nelly

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Jan 1, 2002
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The disease part shouldn't be a big concern if you always practice safe sex, which I think (and hope) that most people do in this day and age.
 

mofi

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Feb 9, 2005
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carina said:
True Mountainfrog...

Many of these guys consider,

1) In the long run you have more money than they have, even if you are not rich. Most of these guys aim to "get" tourists, they know they are not moviestars. They also know whatever money you have, it is more than them. If not now, then at a later stage in life.

2) Their goals are longterm, they want a visa/citizenship.
#1 is interesting- I know for a fact that i have less money then anyone working on a crusieship. I have two friends working on cruiseships one does entertainement/animation and makes about 1800 american a month the other is a dancer and makes 2000 american amonth, if you have no place to spend it because you are always on the ship then you've got some money stockpiled some where.
 

mofi

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Feb 9, 2005
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miguel said:
I know someone in Cancun, Mexico that once told me, while I was vacationing there: "Miguel, you are a very handsome man (yea dick, whatever) but I can get much more girls that you would ever dream of getting. On a slow weekend, I can score with about 10 different girls. I am on a eternal honeymoon!!!". When I asked him how was that possible being that he was a fat, short and ugly duckling (I swear I told him that, kiddingly but I meant it). He response was: I WORK ON A CRUISE SHIP and as long as there are desperate tourists who would believe anything that we tell them, there will always be jobs and women to be had for us ugly ducklings. Some of these morons do not understand that we are paid to show them a good time and make them feel happy. It does not matter how bad they look, we are supposed to say anything in order to make them feel like a million dollars!!!.

QUOTE]
Are you sure I didn't tell you that??? haha but its the truth, like i've said before if you heard what they said behind your back once you were not in the picture it would make you sick.
 

notion

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Oct 2, 2005
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mofi said:
#1 is interesting- I know for a fact that i have less money then anyone working on a crusieship. I have two friends working on cruiseships one does entertainement/animation and makes about 1800 american a month the other is a dancer and makes 2000 american amonth, if you have no place to spend it because you are always on the ship then you've got some money stockpiled some where.

Yeah, that's what he keeps on telling me. "I earn quite a lot here and I'm always on the ship, also I have no wife and kids, therefore I have saved a lot of money. No te preocupes." :rolleyes:

@Nelly
That's exactly what I mean. It's always an issue these days. There are worse things than falling pregnant. I've never gone to bed with anyone w/out a previous check-up and I'm not going to.
 

notion

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Oct 2, 2005
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Of course it could be true, of course it could be a lie, just like everything could be a lie or even quite the opposite.
That's the annoying thing about it - people can tell you whatever they like and you may never find out whether they are/were being sincere or not.
I remain shocked however that a whole nation can be judged in this way... I never thought anything like this possible.
 

trina

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Jan 3, 2002
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notion said:
I remain shocked however that a whole nation can be judged in this way... I never thought anything like this possible.


Believe it. Of course, most of the people on this board only know trash they've met at resorts, they will never come in contact with good Dominican people, the kind that would give you the shirt off their back. AND NO, NOT ALL RESORT WORKERS ARE TRASH. SOME are hard-working, good people like you and I that don't have the education, facilities, or contacts to find anything better. They work hard to support their family and have no interest in conning tourists. We are talking about sankies here, because you posted in this section.
 

carina

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Mar 13, 2005
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notion said:
Of course it could be true, of course it could be a lie, just like everything could be a lie or even quite the opposite.
That's the annoying thing about it - people can tell you whatever they like and you may never find out whether they are/were being sincere or not.
I remain shocked however that a whole nation can be judged in this way... I never thought anything like this possible.

A whole nation being judged? Where?
You have posted in the Sankie section, there is no debate about the nation or the Dominican people in general here. We´re talking sankies.
Come on.:cross-eye
 

notion

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Oct 2, 2005
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ok, I'm sorry, I apologize.

But: do you know any other nation where you within 2 mins of googling come across a term specifically coined for the high number of con artists there is? I found it really scary when that happend.

To be honest - reading in these forums you do get the impression that there are only sankies in the DR, especially in the tourism branch, with hardly any exception to the rule. And I do have the feeling that many people who post here and in other forums are judgemental.

I'm still undecided what kind of person I have met. He says he's a teacher but decided to travel on a cruise ship because his salary is better there, he can save some money and it gives him the chance to travel before he settles down. Plausible? Maybe.
 

carina

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Mar 13, 2005
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notion said:
ok, I'm sorry, I apologize.

But: do you know any other nation where you within 2 mins of googling come across a term specifically coined for the high number of con artists there is? I found it really scary when that happend.

To be honest - reading in these forums you do get the impression that there are only sankies in the DR, especially in the tourism branch, with hardly any exception to the rule. And I do have the feeling that many people who post here and in other forums are judgemental.

I'm still undecided what kind of person I have met. He says he's a teacher but decided to travel on a cruise ship because his salary is better there, he can save some money and it gives him the chance to travel before he settles down. Plausible? Maybe.

Most resort workers are sankies, that´s how it is. Especially in the entertainment areas.
Usually uneducated, poor, but good looking and with a talent of some kind - No I don´t mean pretend to be in love - but singing, dancing etc.

That though, does not make every single one of them sankies, and it is not a matter of judging the people here on the island.

Only you know the guy you met, and only you can see the signs of who he is.
But do remember, these guys are good, really good at the game.