Eve

"God, I have a problem."

"What's the problem, Eve?"

"I know that you created me and provided this
beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, as well as that hilarious comedic snake, but I'm just not happy."

"And why is that, Eve?"
"God, I am lonely, and I'm sick to death of apples."
"Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall create a man for you."
"Man? What is that, God?"

"A flawed creature, with many bad traits. He'll lie,
cheat and be vain; all in all, he'll give you a hard
time. But he'll be bigger, faster and will like to
hunt and kill things. I'll create him in such a way
that he will satisfy your physical needs. He will be
witless and will revel in childish things like
fighting and kicking a ball about. He won't be as
smart as you, so he will also need your advice to
think properly."

"Sounds great," says Eve, with ironically raised eyebrows,
"but what's the catch, God?"

"Well...you can have him on one condition."

"And what's that, God?"

"As I said, he'll be proud, arrogant and
self-admiring...so you'll let him believe that I made
him first. And it will have to be our little secret.
You know...woman to woman."