Computer Term Dictionary

maxschnell

Bronze
Jun 16, 2005
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586: The average IQ needed to understand a PC.

State-of-the-art: Any computer you can't afford.

Obsolete: Any computer you own.

Microsecond: The time it takes for your state-of-the-art computer to become obsolete.

G5: Apple's new Macs that make you say, "Gee, it's five times faster than the computer I bought for the same price a microsecond ago."

Syntax Error: Walking into a computer store and saying, "Hi, I want to buy a computer and money is no object."

Hard Drive: The sales technique employed by computer salesmen, especially after a Syntax Error.

GUI (pronounced "gooey"): What your computer becomes after spilling your coke on it.

Keyboard: The standard way to generate computer errors.

Mouse: An advanced input device to make computer errors easier to generate.

Floppy: The state of your wallet after purchasing a computer.

Portable Computer: A device invented to force businessmen to work at home, on vacation, and on business trips.

Disk Crash: A typical computer response to any critical deadline.

System Update: A quick method of trashing ALL of your software.
 

maxschnell

Bronze
Jun 16, 2005
1,252
0
0
Scuzzy

"SCSI" (pronounced "scuzzy"} for Small Computer Systems Interface-- What you run into when you try to hook up that expensive but incompatible piece of peripheral equipment you bought for your computer.