Updates on my relationship

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japa

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Jun 22, 2008
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So, I have returned, I posted a thread here not so long ago. (See the link on the bottom of this thread)

I didn't even bother to read the comments that I didn't already read. But I read the last comment and the guys said:"He didn't have 5 pesos for ice cream?"

Ok, maybe I wrote it all too confusing, or something....

OF COURSE he had 5 pesos for ice cream.
I don't see the reason, not to buy him ice-cream, just because he is Dominican.

"Oh, hun, I want ice cream, go and buy me some but if you want one you have to buy it yourself because you are Dominican, sorry, tough luck"
He bought me things as well, when I complained to be hungry, he went out to buy me something or looked for food in his house...

Anyways, I just wanted to update a little....

He is going to uni and has already gotten a job. That pays well considering that there is almost no work to find where he lives.
He has started to go more to the internet and send me more messages to my phone so I wont have to bare all the cost off calling/communicating.

He got the opportunity to go to Mexico and play baseball for money. (I know for sure it is true because my parents there confirmed it) But he denied it.

Cause you can never be sure on things like that and I want him to go to uni. I told him that if he wants to be with me, he has to work and go to uni (Way before he got the offer).
I was rather shocked about it cause I didn't know until I was told later about the offer and that he had denied it.

He is applying for a passport and soon I will send him an visitors visa invitation to my country. He will stay here for 3 months during his vacations. He wont have to pay the airline ticket, my parents will.
MY PARENTS ALSO PAID FOR MY BROTHERS GIRLFRIEND AIRLINE TICKETS WHEN SHE WAS VISITING HIM WHEN HE WAS STUDYING IN ANOTHER COUNTRY. My dad is a pilot and he gets special offers. So they are not paying for him cause he doesn't have the money. They are paying cause they would also do it if it was someone from my country or for example my brothers girlfriend. They would do it anyway even though he would be loaded with cash.

I am in no way going to send him money, I don't even know how to cause the western union thing or whatever.... we don't have that here. And I don't know if we have something similar.

I love the Dominican Republic, and I wouldn't mind living there. Not just because of him. I have thought about it over and over again.
When I finish school I am going to go there for another 1-2 years before I start working. I have a family there, I have the cutest little brothers. I have parents. I have the greatest friends in the whole wide world.

I feel so lucky that I have found another place in the world where I can say is my home.

Mi casa.

I admit, I might have acted a little naive and childish. But I understand your warnings. I have been trying to be more careful of what I do and say.

I have told him boundaries, given him rules. Stating clearly what I want and what I do not want in this relationship, what I am going to do and what I am not going to do. And what HE needs to do to help me be sure that he is not a player.
He got a little cranky because I told him that. Thinking that I didn't trust him 100%. But it's ok now. He understands. (Or at least I hope so :cheeky: )

Anyway, for the ones that are really confused.. here is my first thread http://www.dr1.com/forums/men-mars-women-venus/76591-my-relationship.html

(Maybe I wrote some errors and other things when I was angry/ in a hurry, sorry for that)

I will come in here again, just not a lot cause I have crazy job hours and I am starting my college next Tuesday. I will be on business/commercial track and I will have a lot of things to do. But once in a while I will give updates, for the ones that still believe that there are better guys that sanky pankys out there and want to know about others, to compare their relationship with.

Adios! ;)
 

Rocky

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I didn't even bother to read the comments that I didn't already read. But I read the last comment and the guys said:"He didn't have 5 pesos for ice cream?"
! ;)
Thank you for advising us that you didn't even bother reading all the responses, of which there were many, so that we don't waste any more time on you.
I've met people like you before, who love to hear themselves talk but never listen.
They are the most boring people on Earth.
 

laurajane

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May 23, 2005
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Firstly this isn't meant to be an attack, just an observation. In both posts i got the impression that you are trying to convince yourself and not us that he is not a sanky or using you in some way. Have you ever heard the phrase "she doth protest too much"?

I understand that you want reassurance from others or maybe just some advice, but i don't understand why you are basically going out of your way to tell us all he is not a sanky and you don't know about western union, he buys his own things and even went into detail to justify why your parents are paying for his ticket because they did the same for your brothers girlfriend and your dad is a pilot......In that case what exactly are you posting for?
 

Lapurr

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Jan 25, 2008
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hmmmmmm......

what's the update? sounds like the same old blah as last time??

Are your parents happily married? i'm in search of a pilot myself???;)
 

drloca

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Oct 26, 2004
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what's the update? sounds like the same old blah as last time??

Are your parents happily married? i'm in search of a pilot myself???;)

Verify the brothers relationship status...you could get your ticket paid if you get your foot in the door!;)
 

Eddy

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Jan 1, 2002
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Thank you for advising us that you didn't even bother reading all the responses, of which there were many, so that we don't waste any more time on you.
I've met people like you before, who love to hear themselves talk but never listen.
They are the most boring people on Earth.
Holy sh*t the 2nd post was as long and boring as the first. Parent's that pay for airplane flights for people they barely know etc. Now I'm worried about flying. This has got to be another one of THOSE threads.
 
So, I have returned, I posted a thread here not so long ago. (See the link on the bottom of this thread)

I didn't even bother to read the comments that I didn't already read. But I read the last comment and the guys said:"He didn't have 5 pesos for ice cream?"You read all the posts and now are trying to convince yourself otherwise.

Ok, maybe I wrote it all too confusing, or something....

OF COURSE he had 5 pesos for ice cream.
I don't see the reason, not to buy him ice-cream, just because he is Dominican.

"Oh, hun, I want ice cream, go and buy me some but if you want one you have to buy it yourself because you are Dominican, sorry, tough luck"
He bought me things as well, when I complained to be hungry, he went out to buy me something or looked for food in his house...What did he buy you a mango or a chimi??? Definately not marisco or lobster ;)

Anyways, I just wanted to update a little....

He is going to uni and has already gotten a job.Animacion That pays well considering that there is almost no work to find where he lives.And considering he is almost definately unskilled and uneducated!!!!
He has started to go more to the internet and send me more messages to my phone so I wont have to bare all the cost off calling/communicating.Yes, Because some other young lady has taught him to use the internet and sends him money to use it!!!

He got the opportunity to go to Mexico and play baseball for money. (I know for sure it is true because my parents there confirmed it) But he denied it.Turned it all down for the possibility of being with you??? You are pretty convinced you are a hot commodity arent you!!!! Get real he would have left in a heart beat!!!

Cause you can never be sure on things like that and I want him to go to uni. I told him that if he wants to be with me, he has to work and go to uni (Way before he got the offer).
I was rather shocked about it cause I didn't know until I was told later about the offer and that he had denied it.

He is applying for a passport and soon I will send him an visitors visa invitation to my country. He will stay here for 3 months during his vacations. He wont have to pay the airline ticket, my parents will.Your parents are as naive as you are!!! He will never go back home and will find another sucker to latch onto when you come to your senses!!!
MY PARENTS ALSO PAID FOR MY BROTHERS GIRLFRIEND AIRLINE TICKETS WHEN SHE WAS VISITING HIM WHEN HE WAS STUDYING IN ANOTHER COUNTRY.Your parents are delusional people!!! My dad is a pilot and he gets special offers. So they are not paying for him cause he doesn't have the money. They are paying cause they would also do it if it was someone from my country or for example my brothers girlfriend. They would do it anyway even though he would be loaded with cash.If he were loaded with cash he wouldnt be with you, thats a cold hard fact !!!

I am in no way going to send him money, I don't even know how to cause the western union thing or whatever.... we don't have that here. And I don't know if we have something similar.Do you live at the north pole or antartica??? Please lets be realistic

I love the Dominican Republic, and I wouldn't mind living there. Not just because of him. I have thought about it over and over again.
When I finish school I am going to go there for another 1-2 years before I start working. I have a family there, I have the cutest little brothers. I have parents. I have the greatest friends in the whole wide world.?????????????????

I feel so lucky that I have found another place in the world where I can say is my home.

Mi casa.

I admit, I might have acted a little naive and childish. But I understand your warnings. I have been trying to be more careful of what I do and say.No way you are acting like a responsible adult just like your parents ;)

I have told him boundaries, given him rules. Stating clearly what I want and what I do not want in this relationship, what I am going to do and what I am not going to do. And what HE needs to do to help me be sure that he is not a player.
He got a little cranky because I told him that. Thinking that I didn't trust him 100%. But it's ok now. He understands. (Or at least I hope so )He has to be careful who hes with and thats what makes him cranky

Anyway, for the ones that are really confused.. here is my first thread My relationship

(Maybe I wrote some errors and other things when I was angry/ in a hurry, sorry for that)

I will come in here again, just not a lot cause I have crazy job hours and I am starting my college next Tuesday. I will be on business/commercial track and I will have a lot of things to do. But once in a while I will give updates, for the ones that still believe that there are better guys that sanky pankys out there and want to know about others, to compare their relationship with.
 

Princesa777

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Apr 13, 2008
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Why is (almost) everybody here so incredibly negative. Yes I know there are a lot of bad guys in the DR and yes I know that those bad guys in particular are attracted to tourists (or is it the other way around???)

But lets be fair, it's not ALL bad, even if he's not a millionaire and he doesnt have a university degree (yet) it doesnt NECESSARILY mean he's bad. Yes an animacion worker is a no-go area (well for relationships anyway) but there is a lot in between an animacion worker and millionaire...

I also dont really understand what you are trying to do, just make people feel horrible or actually help/warn people? If you are really trying to help/warn, then let me tell you, the way that you are doing it, is NOT working! It might help in those cases involving a bad Sanky that is acting just way too obvious, but in most cases, you people are just way (WAAAAAAAAAAAAAY) to general and people just shut down; ahh, they say this to everybody, why listen? It is a lot more effective to give some constructive critism, tell them what to look (out) for and also note the positive points.
Then people are willing to listen and maybe start to see the warning points more and more...


For example from the post from badpiece33 (without making any conclusion myself if this guy is a sanky or not)
He is going to uni and has already gotten a job.Animacion That pays well considering that there is almost no work to find where he lives.And considering he is almost definately unskilled and uneducated!!!!

Hello???? The guy is going to university?? what do you expect from him? To be skilled educated and have an executive job already??? When I was still going to university I couldnt find the best jobs either... But I see 2 good points here, he is 1 working, and 2 going to university. Now this doesnt mean he is NOT a sanky, but you also cant hold it against him.

To Japa I just wanted to say that I liked reading you story (I think im the only one??) and the best advice that I can give you, is to not do anything that you wouldnt do with/to/for a european guy.

If you dont buy an ice cream for your european boyfriend, dont buy it for your dominican boyfriend either, if you wouldnt change schools for your EU bf, dont change schools for your DR boyfriend, if you wont pay the medical bill for your EU bf...etc.

And another piece of advice, just because he might not be a sanky, doesnt mean he is faithfull to you only (another big problem in DR). BUT just because he is Dominican doesnt mean he is cheating on you either. Just be carefull and keep your eyes open...
 

Lapurr

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Jan 25, 2008
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Why is (almost) everybody here so incredibly negative. Yes I know there are a lot of bad guys in the DR and yes I know that those bad guys in particular are attracted to tourists (or is it the otherway around???)

Princesa,

I hate to be be negative, I always try to look on the bright side...but Japa is all about Japa, i'm not sure what to believe, Before she said her parents were totally against this whole situation but now they are willing to pay for the ticket, how does one change their mind just like that?

She called her family racist at one time, For someone to come on here and take jabs at their family and want us to approve of what she has been doing, just leaves a bad taste in my mouth, On the other hand, some women that date and court DR men are smart, ask the right questions, take things slow, are cautious,have beautiful families and happy homes...There has to be love! ...and i'm sure many relationships have succeeded and will.
 

Princesa777

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Apr 13, 2008
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Princesa,

I hate to be be negative, I always try to look on the bright side...but Japa is all about Japa, i'm not sure what to believe, Before she said her parents were totally against this whole situation but now they are willing to pay for the ticket, how does one change their mind just like that?

She called her family racist at one time, For someone to come on here and take jabs at their family and want us to approve of what she has been doing, just leaves a bad taste in my mouth, On the other hand, some women that date and court DR men are smart, ask the right questions, take things slow, are cautious,have beautiful families and happy homes...There has to be love! ...and i'm sure many relationships have succeeded and will.

Well about Japa, I just read this post and the other one i just scanned quickly. But my comment was not just about the reactions in this post, but more in general.

I agree with the second part of your post, that some women are smart, ask the right questions etc. And this should be encouraged, the women that are not so smart...they should be stimulated in taking the right and appropriate action. It's no use in telling them just to brake up with the guy and saying he's a sanky (honestly, who is ever gonna believe that the guy that you love is a sanky, just because some anonymous guy/girl on a forum says so??) but by giving her the tools and knowledge to find the truth out for herself.
 

Tamborista

hasta la tambora
Apr 4, 2005
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Don't you mean 'baited' breath lol

Actually both Shakespeare and Mark Twain spelled it "bated"!

"Shakespeare is the first writer known to use it, in The Merchant of Venice, in which Shylock says to Antonio: ?Shall I bend low and, in a bondman?s key, / With bated breath and whisp?ring humbleness, / Say this ...?. Nearly three centuries later, Mark Twain employed it in Tom Sawyer: ?Every eye fixed itself upon him; with parted lips and bated breath the audience hung upon his words, taking no note of time, rapt in the ghastly fascinations of the tale?."
World Wide Words: Bated breath
 

Lapurr

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Jan 25, 2008
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i nood i wuz wright -this shakespear dude nos his stuff

don't you mean "noze"?:ermm: ok that's me tryin to be funny!!

Back to Princesa...I see what you are saying, The insult came when she said "she didnt bother reading all our posts" well, she may have missed out on something important!!

Just seems like getting through to her is a difficult task!! thats all!
 

Rocky

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I'm surprised at you all who are replying to the OP.
When someone has the gall to come on here and say she didn't bother to read all our replies to her last thread, at best, if anyone feels the need to reply, you could tell her and "F U 2 !!!"
Or something equally rude.
She doesn't deserve the time of day from us.
 

Bronxboy

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Jul 11, 2007
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I'm surprised at you all who are replying to the OP.
When someone has the gall to come on here and say she didn't bother to read all our replies to her last thread, at best, if anyone feels the need to reply, you could tell her and "F U 2 !!!"
Or something equally rude.
She doesn't deserve the time of day from us.

So let not give her the satifaction and close this thread!!!!!
 
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