Meeting latino/latina friends

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amiguita

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Aug 21, 2009
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What is the best way to make true friends who are spanish? I've met a bunch of latino guys but it seems like they are really friendly and want to get to know me, but always have ulterior motives and would rather i be their sucia than their novia...which i'm not really into (i can't waste all my cooking, caring, novia skills...lol). I want real female friends who want to go out dancing, shopping, resturants, etc. I want a real boyfriend who wants a real relationship. Will i always be a gringa? Tell me the truth...would u let a gringa into your life as a true friend or as a girlfriend?

Sometimes I feel so discouraged :bunny:
 
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AnnaC

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Jan 2, 2002
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Well my dear if this thread is to continue the subject has to be that you want to meet Dominicans in your area. It has to be a DR related subject
 
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amiguita

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Aug 21, 2009
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Ok thanks Anna, i was talking about Hispanic friends in general but u can make it Dominican. I live in Rhode Island....yup i know there are tons of dominicanos here we have our own Dominican neighborhood Calle Broad. I went to a dominican festival 2 weeks ago and it was fun but i kind of felt like an outsider....i want to make real friends how do i do it??? i want to be an equal and erase the differences....how do i get rid of my gringa-ness?
 
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AnnaC

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Jan 2, 2002
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Maybe that is the problem you are having. You can't change what you are and when you make friends you can't pretend to be something that you are not or be like them which you never will be. Be yourself and you might attract people that like your qualities. People come together because they have common interest in something and then discover they actually like each other. Don't try so hard.
 
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amiguita

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Aug 21, 2009
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Ahhhh....ok but i really like the cultures of spanish speaking countries, as well as other cultures. i am myself, because liking other cultures and being drawn to the differences is who i am. i have taught myself spanish (well, sortof), and i talk in spanish all the time. i ask every spanish guy/girl i encounter to speak with me...but i just can't seem to make real friends and it's discouraging.
 
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mountainannie

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Dec 11, 2003
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There is a Dominican expression that there is no possibility of friendship between a man and a woman. So that they have a ways to go here in the relationship department so I would suggest that you completely avoid looking for friends among the males and concentrate on finding women friends. If you are in Providence, try doing volunteer work translating perhaps at the hospital or helping out at some after school program with tutoring the kids and make your way into the family structure... Latins are focused on their families and that will be the best way to get to know them.
 
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las2137

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Sep 1, 2008
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Anna's advice is the best you will get on this subject.

My practical advice is to go to a site like MeetUp.com and find a group of people in your area that have similar interests in Latin culture, language, whatever.
 
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amiguita

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Aug 21, 2009
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AHHH ok so i am actually in a spanish group from meetup.com. The group is helpful in learning to speak spanish, but so far i haven't made any real friends there that are my age (which was deleted???) that i actually hang out with outside of the group. And all the guys in that group are interested in learning spanish to get with spanish girls....so yeah seriously a true friendship between a male and a female is pretty much impossible, i agree with that. I'm not in providence but close, i used to work at Rhode Island Hospital....still no real latina friends...Grr
 
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Berzin

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Nov 17, 2004
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badpiece33 said:
Stop trying so hard to find friends who are a certain type, Just be yourself and keep meeting people and in due time you will find some good friends who may or may not be latin, but thats life honey.
Click to expand...

Good point.

I think the OP is fetishizing latin culture to an unhealthy degree. It sounds as though she wants to recreate herself as a latina for whatever reason, which seems very odd.

For example...

amiguita said:
Will i always be a gringa? Tell me the truth...would u let a gringa into your life as a true friend or as a girlfriend?

Sometimes I feel so discouraged :bunny:
Click to expand...

amiguita said:
I went to a dominican festival 2 weeks ago and it was fun but i kind of felt like an outsider....i want to make real friends how do i do it??? i want to be an equal and erase the differences....how do i get rid of my gringa-ness?
Click to expand...


You can't get rid of your so-called "gringa-ness". It's a part of who you are, and you will never be anything else. Love yourself first for who you are. You'd be surprised what type of people you attract with a bit of self-confidence.
 
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RGVgal

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May 26, 2008
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a great place to meet and really get know latinas is a Dominican Hair Salon. Is there one in your area that you can start patronizing? After a couple of visits, you will know all the ladies and their entire life story.
 
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amiguita

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Aug 21, 2009
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Hi everybody, thanks for the advice and candid opinions, I'm not trying to obsess or fetish or anything. I just want to be part of a culture that I admire and is more social than my own. Sorry if I sound creepy I'm not like that at all! I'm not trying to be after anybody
 
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Adrian Bye

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Jul 7, 2002
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Its pretty funny to see so many people who live in the US/Canada and like to spend a lot of time in the DR tell someone they are wrong for wanting to hang out with latinos!

amiguita: if you think latin women are hot, and want to learn from them, then don't care what anyone thinks - go hang out with them! I think the suggestion about hanging out in the salon is a good one - but even better, why not get a job in a dominican salon?

tip: a lot of dominicans recently moved to the US have a hard time understanding US culture and how to integrate properly. help them with that, and they'll help you understand dominican ways.
 
badpiece33

badpiece33

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Jun 24, 2002
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San Felipe de Puerto Plata, Dominican Republic
amiguita said:
Hi everybody, thanks for the advice and candid opinions, I'm not trying to obsess or fetish or anything. I just want to be part of a culture that I admire and is more social than my own. Sorry if I sound creepy I'm not like that at all! I'm not trying to be after anybody
Click to expand...

Stop trying so hard you are creepy even on this board you come across as creepy, slow down and just try to find a friend not a latino/latina friend first!!!!
 
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