Need advice urgently, pls help me

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GirlInLove

New member
Nov 27, 2009
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Dear all,

i'm a european girl that has a crush on a guy she works with.
He's domenican.
He told me a year ago that he likes me,
but as i came out of bad relationship i could not open my heart.
But we keep getting drawn to eachother and i like him a lot.
Now by coinsidence i found out that he has a wife and a kid.
So i told him that it could never work between us.
He told me he doesn't love his wife anymore but is being a good father for his kid.
I told him that was great, but that i also want to get married and have a kid one day. I'm 25.
And he told my why that would not be possible.
He claims that he wants to be with me,
but how do know he is true?
He never takes me home.
One day he sys he lives with a friend, now he is staying with her...
he says he loves me and wants to be with me,
and that i'm not like the other girls.
Doesn't that sound like a lot of bull**** to you guys?

pls help me out with any advise

i need it urgently before my heart gets broken again

krgds

GirlInLove
 
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Adrian Bye

Bronze
Jul 7, 2002
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there's not enough here to tell. but some facts:

a) dominican guys have a lot of game
b) dominican guys aren't very honest to women
c) if you have suspicions you could be right, but not necessarily. (80% right)
 
A

AnnaC

Gold
Jan 2, 2002
16,050
418
83
Sound like he needs a place to live and anyone that believes him gets the big prize, "HIM".
Wake up, plenty of good guys out that there won't sweep you off your feet with lies. More desperate a person is the bigger the lie and what ever works on you so he can get what he needs right now.

What's so great about this guy anyway?


Give us a little more,
how long has he been in your country?
How did he get there?
Is his wife Dominican?

Don't be another victim!!!!!
 
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GirlInLove

New member
Nov 27, 2009
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he came to europe for his wife
she is european too
hink they are here for 2 or 3 years
their kid is 1,5

don't know what makes him so great,
maybe i have idea of what kind of man he is,
but is it only how i hope he is.

don't think he is looking for some place to stay
he never asked me
he wanted to go to my place,
but i didn't let him
he's friends know about me
and he said thaht everyone at work can know

i don't know...
 
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catcherintherye

Silver
Mar 2, 2008
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And what nationality are you?

What is your native language? Do the two of you share a common language?

I am assuming for the time being that this a legitimate inquiry, but you obviously must realize this type of thread is notorious for bringing out the trolls and the sock puppets.

Is there some additional information you could provide that would help us better understand your situation and the level of your veracity?

Thanks ever so much for your trust and willingness to share. I know this must be extremely difficult for you.
 
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GirlInLove

New member
Nov 27, 2009
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i'm belgian
we talk english with each other

what do you mean by veracity?

Ask me what you need to know and i'll answer,
is difficult but i need help and am grateful for your replies

x
 
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catcherintherye

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Mar 2, 2008
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I am attempting to determine the basis of your relationship.

Is English his native language? Do you communicate well together? What do you talk about? Do you read the same books and/or newspapers? What interests do you share?

In other words, what is it about him that attracts you?
 
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GirlInLove

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Nov 27, 2009
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spanish is his native language
but we work for english company
so we communicate well
we went out for a drink and talked about life, family
how he spend his yought
why he came here
that he misses his family

i can talk to him about evrything
and he listens and gives his opinion

we read the same books but he often in spanish and me in english and then we can talk about them too

we can talk about our job

we have lunch and breaks together
 
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AnnaC

Gold
Jan 2, 2002
16,050
418
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Yes you can talk. Let me guess, you say, I read this book and he says, me too but in Spanish, you say something and OMG me too, he says. That's called mirroring. It's a technique to make one think you are their soul mate.

If you are planning to have kids in your future and he has said no then what do you have in common exactly?


Oh yes here we go; you say "maybe i have idea of what kind of man he is,
but is it only how i hope he is" which means you really don't know him and are building an image of what you would like him to be. Ask his wife, I'm sure she'll tell you exactly how he is :laugh:

I'll stop now because I know there's no point and you'll do whatever you want.
 
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GirlInLove

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Nov 27, 2009
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fyi anna,
he is not mirroring,
i'm not a retard
i saw him reading the book first then we talked about it
and by talking i am perfectly capable of knowing if someone read the book or the review

and we talk about more than books

but if that is the help you wantto give anna,
you are right,
pls stop
 
Tamborista

Tamborista

hasta la tambora
Apr 4, 2005
11,747
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GirlInLove said:
fyi anna,
he is not mirroring,
i'm not a retard
i saw him reading the book first then we talked about it
and by talking i am perfectly capable of knowing if someone read the book or the review

and we talk about more than books

but if that is the help you wantto give anna,
you are right,
pls stop
Click to expand...

You could have fooled us in this thread!

;)
 
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AnnaC

Gold
Jan 2, 2002
16,050
418
83
So what do you need advice on then? You asked us yourself if it all sounds like BS and it absolutely does to me.
Good luck and sorry if you haven't heard what you wanted.

But he sounds like a great guy you should totally be with him. ;)
 
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G

GirlInLove

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Nov 27, 2009
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P.S. he never said that it was not possible to ghet married and have kids,
when i said that i wanted that in future and that i thought it would not be possible with him he said 'why not? '

he says that he is young and has the right to have a happy life with a womanhe loves and can be a good father all in one
and does not have to be unhappy all his life because it didn't work out with the mom
 
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GirlInLove

New member
Nov 27, 2009
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catcherintherye said:
Exactly what advice are you looking for?
Click to expand...

i read the forum about how they all are cheaters
and i don't know nothing about domenican guys
how they act when they play or how they are when they are truthfull
and hoped for some advise
but i start to think that i must be blind and most of them are the same
so why should i be that lucky to have good one
 
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catcherintherye

Silver
Mar 2, 2008
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Sounds like you found yourself a keeper.

No need to waste any more time. Consummate the deal, and spend a happy life with your man.

This is obviously a match made in heaven.
 
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GirlInLove

New member
Nov 27, 2009
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thank you all for the advise

i know that big part of me is naieve because i'm in love
and my heart wants him to be truthfull
but i also know that ' a married father' is never good relationship material,
even if he wouldn't be domenican,is difficult in any country :)

after talking to you all i know that i have to be carefull
and that is what i was hoping to find here

so thank you from the bottom of my naive heart

kiss
 
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