Posted new thread in error

[Helen]

I've been thinking...

Someone else posted something to this affect...all the sankies want to do is scam the foreigners' money, get a visa to their country, leave them high & dry & then return to the DR with money to help the family!

Reading between those lines started me thinking...if someone from a first world nation - educated (at least more so than the average dominican), is an adult, able to think for themselves, etc...etc...is gullible and naive enough to be taken in by another, who's never had the priviledges of all that's available in that "first world nation" then so be it! Maybe, that dominican will return to the DR with some money & first world savy to stop the next generation of his family from doing what he did to get ahead!

I agree with Trina that generalizations about anything (be it nationalities, sexual preferences, etc) doesn't have any positive impacts. Let's not visit the sins of fathers onto the sons. I've known of fathers who were wife beaters and their sons not! I've known of fathers who were cheaters and their sons not! It certainly doesn't help the odds of the sons coming out ahead in life but, I guess, them's the breaks!

 

[Helen]

For Debs...

Helen!!! Great to see you on the board!!! You're right about the babies being beautiful, especially your little guy.

We'll all have to get together again soon and catch up. Have you gone on your vacation yet? Give me a call!

Thanks Debs. I think the mixed babies are just beautiful. Look at Criss's girl and Trina's boy...sigh! Too bad my genes are so strong that my boy only looks like my side of the family. The only thing he inherited from his dad is the wavy hair! Guess who lost the bet on whether Alejandro is going to stay fair or turn darker??? lol
Not returning to the DR for my vacation any time soon. Taking the baby to the Far East for an extended trip instead. Leaving in May & will be away for a month or so. Will call soon.

 

[Dominican Babe]

Dominican men cheat ,and beat,on their wives! They abandon their children

Not all Dominican men. You can't make such a sweeping statement as that and get away with it. Men all over the world cheat, beat their wives and abandon their kids. Hell, in some countries bigamy is part of life - how's that for cheating on your wife?

 

[Criss Colon]

"TRINA",I will if you will! .....................You go first!

and you can say it and be right!!!!!!!!!!!!!!CRIS

Sorry PIB,I didn't realize that you don't watch "Canal27",or read a newspaper! If you had you might have seen the large number of women who have been beaten or killed by their husband here in the Dominican Republic!
"Generalizations" are the life blood of all the posts,and posters, on DR1! If I see lots of examples in the "media",and from personal experience, of dominican men who have lots of babies with lots of different mothers and don't support any of them, I say that Dominican men are not responsible fathers!A "Generalization" to be sure! You respond that your father is a responsible man,"Trina" says her husband is "wonderful"! She knows 30 "Happy Couples" in Canada,and the husband doesn't "beat",or "cheat"!
Few women are proud that they are beaten by their husbands,so they keep it a secret,same goes for "cheating"!

My "Generalizations" are "better" than yours!Been to a "Barrio Caliente" lately? I doubt it! Hundreds of thousands of examples of "Mine",very few of "Yours"!

My "generalizations" are backed up by large numbers,"your",are just personal points of view,laced with a huge dose of "Wishful Thinking"!

If "your" generalizations about Dominican Polititians being "corrupt" have validity,so do "my" generalizations about the sexual and cultural activities of the Dominican People!!!!

I am a "student" of Human Behavior,but a defender of no behavior! CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC

 

[trina]

The facts

I've been busy, searching the net on facts against violence against women. Wherever it happens, whenever it happens, it is a totally cowardly act commited by the lowest forms of life. Whether or not abusers are a product of their past, they need to one day grow up and make a change in their lives. That being said, this is what I found on the US:

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MURDER . Every day four women die in this country as a result of domestic violence, the euphemism for murders and assaults by husbands and boyfriends. That's approximately 1,400 women a year, according to the FBI. The number of women who have been murdered by their intimate partners is greater than the number of soldiers killed in the Vietnam War.
BATTERING . Although only 572,000 reports of assault by intimates are officially reported to federal officials each year, the most conservative estimates indicate two to four million women of all races and classes are battered each year. At least 170,000 of those violent incidents are serious enough to require hospitalization, emergency room care or a doctor's attention.

SEXUAL ASSAULT . Every year approximately 132,000 women report that they have been victims of rape or attempted rape, and more than half of them knew their attackers. It's estimated that two to six times that many women are raped, but do not report it. Every year 1.2 million women are forcibly raped by their current or former male partners, some more than once.

THE TARGETS . Women are 10 times more likely than men to be victimized by an intimate. Young women, women who are separated, divorced or single, low-income women and African-American women are disproportionately victims of assault and rape. Domestic violence rates are five times higher among families below poverty levels, and severe spouse abuse is twice as likely to be committed by unemployed men as by those working full time. Violent attacks on lesbians and gay men have become two to three times more common than they were prior to 1988.

IMPACT ON CHILDREN . Violent juvenile offenders are four times more likely to have grown up in homes where they saw violence. Children who have witnessed violence at home are also five times more likely to commit or suffer violence when they become adults.

AND IN CANADA:
Half of Canadian women (51%) have been victims of at least one act of physical or sexual violence since the age of 16.

Of all victims of crimes against the person in 2000*, females made up the vast majority of victims of sexual assaults (86%), criminal harassment (78%) and kidnapping/hostage-taking or abduction (67%).

Of all female victims of violent crimes in 2000*, 47% were victims of common assault, 9% of sexual assault, 9% of assault with a weapon causing bodily arm, 7% of robbery and 6% of criminal harassment.

Women are much more likely to be victimized by someone they know than by a stranger. In 2000*, 77% of all female victims were victimized by someone they know (37% by a close friend or an acquaintance, 29% by a current or past partner, 11% by other family members - including parents) while 19% were victimized by a stranger.

I counldn't actually find DR-specific stats, maybe someone can help me out there, but I think we'll find it's stats won't be much different than in the DR.

Sorry, Criss, but you are nowhere near right yet. I may agree with you on the majority of your posts, but you're never going to convince me that every Dominican man is a horrible person. You're not even close there. You say that infedelity is a chain passed along from father to son, and that Dominican men are doomed because of this. Well HELLO, wasn't that you bragging about your conquests on another thread at the same time? What are you showing your sons? How are you any better than the Dominican cheats?

 

[AnnaC]

Ok I'm not taking side here I just wanted to say that a few days ago it was reported right here on the DR1 news that in Santiago there are 400 to 500 calls Monthly to report abuse to women. I didn't say it, the news did.
Wanted to add that there are men that beat women all over the world not just the DR.
Trina you found a treasure. Hang on to him. He was also raised in a good family.To anyone else if you have found a good guy hang on they are not easy to find.

 

[Pib]

As of yesterday 29 women have been murdered by their spouses in the Dominican Republic in the last 3 months. (From Diario Libre)

4 mil 534 cases of spousal abuse have been denounced to the policed. 99% of the victims were women. (From Isis Intl.)

 

[Criss Colon]

Trina,Trina,Trina If you want to make it "personal" at least be accurate!

I must really be touching a nerve in you about the violent and cheating behavior on the part of millions of dominican men!

1.If it makes you "feel" better,I engage in extra-marital intercourse several times a week!I have an apartment,it takes about 1 hour,and my wife "Knows",but doesn't want to hear about it!My children are not "in the loop" of what their parents sex lives are all about.Maybe your situation is different?

2.I have never in my life used violence,physical force,intimidation or the threat of same against any woman.I have beat the "Living Shit" out of about 5 men however!

3.I have never,ever stated that;"All Dominican men cheat,or beat their wives"! I have and will say that it is "common" here,and "overlooked" by ALL concerned!!!

I'll try one last time,"I am not talking about "YOU",or "YOUR"husband! ,or the 30 couples that you know in Canada! OK?

I am talking about all the cleaning ladies that show up on Monday mornings here with black eyes!!!!!
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:knockedou

 

[trina]

Unbelievable, Anna, I agree, it happens way too much, in any sense.

So if you consider these calls as reports, that would average out (using the 500 number) to 16.7 every day. In the US, there were 572,000 reports (we all know reported cases, in both countries, are far lower than actual incidents), which averages out to 1,567 every day. Adjust that to population, and what do you get? A very comparable figure, I'd say. In other words, it happens in the DR as much as it happens in the good old US of A.

Criss, I am not taking it as a personal attack or as a reference to my husband, but yes you did say that all Dominican men cheat on their wives and cannot be trusted. My husband is a Dominican man. I am just asking that you don't put them all in one basket.

I don't really care about your extra-marital affairs, that's yours and your wife's problem. However, how can you condemn another man for doing the exact same thing that you do?

 

[Pib]

I have to return to doing whatever thing my employer pays me to do, but I will try later and find out more statistics on this subject. I doubt that there are more actual incidents of spousal abuse, I have a hunch that it is only the cases that are brought to light that are increasing. This can have a positive impact as authorities are pressed to do more and society is made more aware of the problem. On the other hand it may desensitize (sp?) people and it could cause them to start ignoring the problem.

Maybe someone with more time and brains will chime in and help me here.

 

[Criss Colon]

"Open em up Trina"! Your eyes,and your mind!

It is not a "contest" about which counrty has fewer "Wife "Beaters/Cheaters"! This (DR1) is a forum about the DR!
Where your "comparison" really falls on it's face,is when you compare the "reporting" of domestic abuse in the US and the DR and come up with a "Very comparable figure",you really must stop smoking whatever it is you are "smoking"! Not a chance!! and we all know it!

Why don't we all agree that any incidence of "Spousal" abuse(Wives beating husbands is a real secret!) child abuse,and/or elder abuse sucks and should be brought into the open,and never allowed to go un-noticed!

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[trina]

ummmmmmmmmmm...I'd say you're the one smoking some funny stuff, Criss. 1567 reported cases daily in the US, compared to 16.7 reported cases daily in the DomRep? That's about a 100:1 ratio....considering the US has a current population of 290,411,329 and the DR has a current population of 8,389,231, it is reported MORE OFTEN in the US than in the DR.

Sorry, but you are the one that has been dogging the Dominican man so much. Yes, many are bad...many leave their wives, many beat their wives...but it happens ALL OVER, not just in the DR. I am the one trying to open up your mind. We can both concede that abuse happens way too often, there, and all over the world. As well as infidelity, and deadbeat dads. I'd tend to agree with you on deadbeat dads, I think it's much more prevalent in the DR, but that, unfortunately, goes along with any impovershed country.

 

[Criss Colon]

Trina,everyone on the Planet condems others for doing the same things they do!!!

Few people are "up-front" about it!

"Look at her,she must put her make-up on with a shovel!""Tammi Fay Backer"

"Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultry"Every Priest,clergyman and Cleric in the last 2000 years


"That bitch gets married more often than she changes her underware!" Elizabeth Taylor

"If she had as many pricks sticking out of her as she has had stuck into her,she would look like a Porcupine!"Linda Lovelace

"Bill Clinton has "shamed the office of the President Of The United States!" All Former Presidents(Except Jimmy Carter)

Hipocracy is in little danger of disappearing soon!


Trina,the reporting of crime in gereral,and wife and child abuse in particular, in the Dominican Republic just does not happen on a regular basis! Many Dominican men,AND women consider beating your wife,and slapping around your kids to be "NORMAL"! No need to tell anyone! You are part of the PROBLEM! Denial doesn't make it go away,it makes it OK! CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCc

 

[trina]

Oh, okay that makes it all better...

I think we'll have to agree to disagree on this whole subject...I've already wasted way too much company time! lol

 

[AnnaC]

Today's news in english

Focus on violence against women
With celebrations set to honor Woman?s Day on March 8, El Caribe and the Listin Diario carry reports today on intra-family violence and the pathos caused by the needless deaths of so many women. So far, police statistics show that conjugal violence has claimed the lives of 29 Dominican women so far this year.
El Caribe newspaper headlines that 500 children have been orphaned over the past three years. ?There are times when no one shows up to take care of those children, and others when there is an aunt or grandparents whose living conditions are worse than those of the parents,? Mercedes Lora, spokeswoman for the Ministry of Women told the newspaper. The effects of this will be felt in the future. ?Children will repeat as adults what they learned in their childhood,? warns Altagracia Valdez, of the Women Training program of the Ministry of Women.
?Policies to counteract violence have improved and there is a national concern for the well-being of women,? Elisa Sanchez Pujols, in charge of the Department for Children and Teenagers of the Attorney General?s Office told El Caribe. She highlighted the ratification of Laws 24-97 and 14-94 that provide legal frameworks for the protection of women and children.
The Listin Diario carries a five-page report on the dramatic story of what happens in the homes that are hit by family violence. According to the Listin, four of every five women killed leave as many as three children less than 10 years old. The Ministry of Women estimates that just last year, 200 children were orphaned by such violence. According to the Ministry, 65 percent of the women killed were between the ages of 16 and 35 years old, and in several of these cases the children actually witnessed the murder of their mother, the suicide of their father or step-father, or were themselves attacked and somehow escaped death.

 

[Ken]

Thanks for posting the news reports, Anna. I should think everyone could agree that there is a very serious wife-abuse problem in the DR. And this is probably just the tip of the iceberg, since there are likely many women here who don't dare report abuse for fear their only source of income will be cut off.

Is the problem limited to the DR, of course not. Is it worse here than elsewhere, who knows. And as far as this board is concerned, who cares, since the focus of the board is supposed to be the Dominican Republic.

 

[trina]

I was wondering how long it would take for that voice of condescension to arrive!

 

[Criss Colon]

Trina,better get home to that faithful husband of yours!

I think you are a little frustrated today.That is KEN you just sucker punched! What the hell did he do? This thread is "Done" stick a fork in it!!! CRIS

 

[trina]

Wow, did I sound that harsh? I didn't mean to.

I am sorry if I hurt your feelings, Criss...you're right, this is done, it's not going to help either of us to argue about it anymore than we've done on this thread, or every other time we butt heads on this issue.

 

[AnnaC]

Ok all agree it's done nuff said? great. One last word from me.
There's good people and not so good people in all of the world.
Thread closed let's move on to sex. I mean love.