Custody Issues

I don't know of any cases because I don't know of anyone in your situation who allowed the Dominican spouse to take the child to the DR. It was not permitted in the several cases that I know of.

My advice is to trust your instincts. If you think there is a chance ex will not return on schedule, do not permit the child to leave Canada. It does not make any difference whether I or someone else knows of cases where a child was not brought back from the DR, we know this happens from articles about cases in other countries, such as Brazil and Japan.

You have one battle on your hands now, do you want another to extradite the child back to Canada?

The question you should be asking Fabio Guzman, the lawyer who responds to questions of law, is what is the process for getting a child back if a parent involved in a custody case takes the child to another country and refuses to return on schedule.

AlterEgo said:

I'm not an attorney - but my advice is UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES should you allow your ex to bring the child to DR "on vacation" or "to visit family". It may be the last time you see the child, once in DR it will be very difficult - if not impossible - to get the child back to Canada.

AE

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This is GREAT advice..............

twillight said:

Tthe laywers involved for the child is recommending for him the ex to take our child to DR every where for 2weeks.

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A recommendation is not a court order.

If I were you, I would continue to say that until you are given an iron-clad guarantee that the boy will be returned to the US at the end of 2 weeks that he must stay in the US. The father can spend two weeks with him at places of his choosing, but they must be in the US.

The Hague convention applies, but like others, I'm not a lawyer and invoking Hague rights requires lawyers and legal maneuvers. Against all advice (family, friends, and lawyers) I allowed my child to travel from the US with his Dominican father during our divorce. I feel for you, and know how confusing these things are. In the end, there's much conflicting advice, and no-one can predict what will happen. Please fell free to pm or e-mail me, I'd be happy to share more details in private. While I'm in the US, it seems that our situations may have been very similar and I know and appreciate how insecure it feels right now. Where custody is concerned I'm assuming that Canada is similar to the US, excuse my ignorance if I'm wrong. Stay strong and be well.

Ken2 said:

A recommendation is not a court order.

If I were you, I would continue to say that until you are given an iron-clad guarantee that the boy will be returned to the US at the end of 2 weeks that he must stay in the US. The father can spend two weeks with him at places of his choosing, but they must be in the US.

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Further Ken, if the Lawyer concerned is working on CANADIAN laws, these will be totally different as to how DOMINICAN lawyers/judges work.

Does the child have Canadian &/or Dominican citizenship?
Where was the child born?
DOES the child even have a Passport (& if so for which country)?

If there is a dissagreement with custody AT THIS STAGE, just how much more proof can the OP need to see that there will be a serious problem if the child is brought down to the DR? :ermm: IF the Ex really wants to take the child to the DR to meet the family, why not use getting the custody order sorted out first as the bargaining tool? No resolution in the Courts as to custody ...... NO trip with child to the DR!

I am all for the child having the oportunity to meet with it's extended family in the DR BUT ONLY WHEN FULL LEGAL STATUS has been agreed by the parents IN CANADA so that the Canadian Legal authorities can demand the child's return to Canada! ~ Grahame.

La Rubia said:

The Hague convention applies, but like others, I'm not a lawyer and invoking Hague rights requires lawyers and legal maneuvers. Against all advice (family, friends, and lawyers) I allowed my child to travel from the US with his Dominican father during our divorce. I feel for you, and know how confusing these things are. In the end, there's much conflicting advice, and no-one can predict what will happen. Please fell free to pm or e-mail me, I'd be happy to share more details in private. While I'm in the US, it seems that our situations may have been very similar and I know and appreciate how insecure it feels right now. Where custody is concerned I'm assuming that Canada is similar to the US, excuse my ignorance if I'm wrong. Stay strong and be well.

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Yes, Hague convention applies. But Brazil is a signatory and who can forget what happened there and how long and at how much cost to get boy back to the US.

I'm in full agreement with BushBaby.

Meantime, twilight, I recommend that you start another thread in this same section, Legal, and explain that you are Canadian and your ex husband is Dominican and that the two of you are involved in a battle over custody of your child. Say that you are being pressured to allow the father take the child to the DR for a 2-week visit and for this reason you want to know how difficult it would be to get the child sent back to Canada if the father decided to stay in the DR with the child.

Start a new thread, but just with the question. This thread doesn't really have any question for the lawyer. Don't write the question in this thread, start a new one.

Ken2 said:

....Start a new thread, but just with the question. This thread doesn't really have any question for the lawyer. Don't write the question in this thread, start a new one.

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There are currently two different threads. I really don't think she needs a third. Maybe the MODS can merge the two.

If case you missed it, this is post #1 of this thread.

twillight said:

I am Canadian, ex is Dominican. We all live in Canada.
I wanted to know if there are any stories of DR men or women bringing their child to DR for vacations and not returning? or using blackmail for money?

The Custody battle is on here in Canada (its been a long process and still ongoing), and he wants to bring our child to DR to visit his family. I fear many things if this was allowed. Does anyone have any stories of this similar issue?

Thanks for you help.

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The second thread is here:
http://www.dr1.com/forums/living/101945-shared-custody.html#post845417

La Rubia said:

The Hague convention applies, but like others, I'm not a lawyer and invoking Hague rights requires lawyers and legal maneuvers. Against all advice (family, friends, and lawyers) I allowed my child to travel from the US with his Dominican father during our divorce. I feel for you, and know how confusing these things are. In the end, there's much conflicting advice, and no-one can predict what will happen. Please fell free to pm or e-mail me, I'd be happy to share more details in private. While I'm in the US, it seems that our situations may have been very similar and I know and appreciate how insecure it feels right now. Where custody is concerned I'm assuming that Canada is similar to the US, excuse my ignorance if I'm wrong. Stay strong and be well.

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I like this post alot.

I can only offer what i believe is good advice from my own experience and from what i learned from others in the same situation.

Just like Rubia says above, you will get conflicting advice. I for one have been able to travel with my kids to DR during my divorce. However, my ex and i NEVER allowed our disagreements to get in the way of what was best for the children. I never got in his way to see them or to spend time with them - outside of my own house or supervision and this worked out well for us. Six years later, we have a great parenting relationship. Long time in the making, but well worth it.

Of course, if you feel your son will be in danger, this is another story, but you know better.I suggest that you follow your heart, but dont let your personal feelings against your ex get in the way of your childs relationship with him.

This is the beginning of a life-long situation you will need to come to terms with. He will forever be your son's father and he will stay Dominican.

At the end of the day, dont lose sight of the most important fact: if he wants to spend time with his son, please dont take that away from the child. Not many of us can say we grew up with our fathers in our lives. This is why i continue to make every effort i can to keep my communication lines open with my ex.

I will also offer the best divorce advice i received from a friend: You shouldnt try to micromanage the father's relationship with his son. it is futile.

All the best...

Talldrink said:

This is the beginning of a life-long situation you will need to come to terms with. He will forever be your son's father and he will stay Dominican.

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Truer words couldn't be spoken. Thanks for that!

Talldrink said:

I like this post alot.

I can only offer what i believe is good advice from my own experience and from what i learned from others in the same situation.

Just like Rubia says above, you will get conflicting advice. I for one have been able to travel with my kids to DR during my divorce. However, my ex and i NEVER allowed our disagreements to get in the way of what was best for the children. I never got in his way to see them or to spend time with them - outside of my own house or supervision and this worked out well for us. Six years later, we have a great parenting relationship. Long time in the making, but well worth it.

Of course, if you feel your son will be in danger, this is another story, but you know better.I suggest that you follow your heart, but dont let your personal feelings against your ex get in the way of your childs relationship with him.

This is the beginning of a life-long situation you will need to come to terms with. He will forever be your son's father and he will stay Dominican.

At the end of the day, dont lose sight of the most important fact: if he wants to spend time with his son, please dont take that away from the child. Not many of us can say we grew up with our fathers in our lives. This is why i continue to make every effort i can to keep my communication lines open with my ex.

I will also offer the best divorce advice i received from a friend: You shouldnt try to micromanage the father's relationship with his son. it is futile.

All the best...

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Talldrink's advice is very good. Despite your ex's actions against you and his failure to keep up on child support, he will always be the father of your child and it's better for everyone if you can at least work out an amicable situation for the sake of your son. Even if you don't feel comfortable allowing your child to travel with his father to the Dominican Repbulic at this time (which is understandable), it would be nice in the future for both your ex and your son for your son to have a relationship with his extended family and to see the country where his father was born and raised. I can only imagine how hard the situation is right now but perhaps once all the custody and child support issues are sorted out and everyone's emotions are not as fragile, things might work out for the best that will make everyone happy. Just remember that bitterness can really taint a child and I'm sure that you want your relationship with your child to be the best it possibly can so try and keep your issues with your ex and the best intersts of your child seperate (although hard to do things will work out better this way).

The following are some links to some very similar situations that have gone through the Canadian courts and involved Dominican nationals:

Almonte v. Shukin, [2003] B.C.J. No. 1713
Spini v. Spini, [1994] N.B.J. No. 567
Wasylenko v. Wasylenko, [2008] S.J. No. 14
Wasylenko v. Wasylenko, SFLN/2008-096

If you look on the website CANLII.ORG you can do a search to find the caselaw.

Best of luck with your situation.