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Thread: It is with a heavy heart

  1. #1
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    Default It is with a heavy heart

    I must announce that my family's brief encounter with this beautiful island is at an end.

    After 2 years with my wife and kids living in Santo Domingo and me visiting every 2 months from the UK we have decided that we need to be together and as a result mi esposa y mis dos hijos are flying out tomorrow evening.

    Many things have accumulated to bring about this decision.

    I will try and outline the main reasons.

    1. An apartment we have been waiting to be completed and is now 2 years overdue (95% done) is now in the precarious position whereby the builder doesn't have the funds to complete and his lending bank is becoming impatient with his mounting debt and interest payments. Its not looking good for us, we have paid about 50% up front and really don't know how this will pan out.

    2. As a result of the above, my wife and kids have been living in another of our properties, a 4th apartment with no lift.

    3. My wife is in need of a 'womans operation' and combine this with point 2 and she is basically worn out physically.

    4. My wife has been looking after our 2 kids by herself, and as my daughter is now 13 years old and is a might difficult to say the least, my wife is also mentally exhausted.

    5. The basic fact that we dont live together for more than 2 weeks at a time as a family is something we were willing to live with provided we could see some light at the end of the tunnel.

    6. I am unable to sell our house in London, (credit crunch) so there's little in the way of tunnel light here.

    7. Our savings in Bank Certificates are one by one reaching their term and its a bit of a drop in income when as recently we had to re-new a CD which had a rate of 16% for a new rate of 6% - could have done a bit better than that admittedly but we didnt want to tie it up for more than a year.

    Financially I will admit we are in a fairly priviledged position, during the 2 years we have never had to touch any of our capital, we have other properties which provide rental income. But we just had to call it a day.

    The kids have made some lovely friends and we are taking them away from them, just like we did when we moved them from the UK 2 years ago. I feel awful in doing this to them again. Everyone says 'kids adapt' but its still going to affect them quite severely.

    They went to the Dominico Americano for the 1st year (school is run more like a money making concern than a school)

    The 2nd year they have been at APEC (only school I have ever known anywhere where I can honestly say all the kids seem to be happy and bullying doesn't exist - would recommend it strongly)

    We have made some fantastic friends and will visit as regularly as we can.

    It is still our long-term wish to retire in the DR but it will now be after the children have completed their education. That may include University.

    Obviously if it turns out that we are all un-happy here in London, then I will simply sell the house at whatever price I am offered and we'll all come back.

    But that is the 'key'. ALL come back - I would never live apart from my family again for all the money in the world.

    I have missed 2 years of the kids growing up - I haven't been there to help with their homework or assignments as the Americans say.

    Finally I must admit that I am writing this down as a form of release I think. Why else would someone put down their personal trials and tribulations on a message board? I will always peruse DR1.com because the DR will always remain my personal dream, and although I don't contribute much, I feel as if I know so many of the regular posters. So many of whom are so quick to come forward with warm words for people in need.

    So I will still be loggin on every day but I will be a liitle happier just to have my family with me. No longer will I be checking the Santo Domingo weather and saying a little 'thank-you' when the temperatures drop a little, knowing how much they suffer from the constant heat as indeed many of you do.

    My wife is a Dominicana and I would like to take this opportunity to pay tribute to her and to say that she is one of the kindest and most un-selfish people you could ever wish to meet. She always has a 'little old lady project' on the go. By that I mean she finds a little old lady who lives nearby and literally looks after her as if she were a daughter. She's done it twice in the past 2 years. She'll take them food, medicine, she'll cut their hair, wash them, whatever needs doing. I used to think she was crazy and couldn't understand it but she just makes them feel loved and wanted I guess. She'll not be leaving a 'project' behind as unfortunately neither of them are with us any longer.

    And before anyone thinks she may have been performing some kind of euthenasia programme both the old ladies died of natural causes well into their 90's. (ONLY JOKING)

    So I'll leave it at that for now. A new chapter in our lives begins. I'll let you know how we all get on.

    Thanks for listening (I think of it as listenening rather than reading) even though I've been somewhat long-winded.

    As Arnie would say if he was speaking on behalf of himself and his family...

    WE'LL BE BACK

    Paul

  2. #2
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    Buena suerte!!!!!

  3. #3
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    I'm so sorry it didn't work out as expected. You sound like a lovely family and I'm sorry we didn't get to meet. Best of luck in this next phase and good to hear you'll be staying in touch.

  4. #4
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    Default Thank-you

    Quote Originally Posted by Bronxboy View Post
    Buena suerte!!!!!
    Much appreciated

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chirimoya View Post
    I'm so sorry it didn't work out as expected. You sound like a lovely family and I'm sorry we didn't get to meet. Best of luck in this next phase and good to hear you'll be staying in touch.
    Chiramoya

    I know for a fact that you are a very special person, it is indeed a shame we never met. But who knows what the future might bring.

    God bless you for being the person you are.

    Hasta luego

  6. #6
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    Wish you all the luck back in England, and hope to meet you when you return here...

    The economic crisis is hitting everybody, one way or another...

  7. #7
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    Freemo (Paul)
    PM me when/if you feel like it & let me know where in the UK you are situated. Then next time I come across I'll bring an extra case filled with Presidente &/or Dominican coffee! !

    Sorry to hear of your leaving but wish you ALL GOOD FORTUNE. Hopefully yesterday's emergency budget will not affect you nastily & allow fairly regular trips home (Santo Domingo & the DR ARE HOME aren't they??????) ~ Grahame

  8. #8
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    Life is always changing, so change is a constant. Your situation may change and you may come back sooner than you think. However if you don't, worry not the DR will be here ready and waiting for you to embrace her once again. You have gained much more appreciation for you kids and wife, so you will be involved now full throttle catching up on the time you feel you have lost. Your children are Dominican and they can come back in the future and re-connect with Quisqeya in the future, we Dominicans do that we just can't stay away from this piece of land. Be well and may you be blessed.

  9. #9
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    Hi Paul,

    I remember your posts from a couple of years back when there was a lot of soul searching going on and we exchanged a few PM's. Having been in the position myself of having to call it quits and move back to the UK with my heart saying NO and my head saying YES ..... I know how hard it is. I admire you for being brave enough to realise where, collectively, your best interests are.
    My very best wishes to you all and Good Luck for the future.
    Keep in touch, you hear!
    Rio

    PS... When Grahame turns up with the Presidente, let me know, I'll be there!!!!

  10. #10
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    Good luck Freemo. It sounds to me you are doing the right thing.


    Buena Suerte.

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