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  1. #1
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    Default Soliciting opinions on a audacious request I've just received

    Recently I've received the request to become padrino at the wedding of a once-removed cousin of my wife (he is the son of a daughter of my mother-in-law)..

    Here are the circumstances:

    1. I've known him for 5 years and he's never asked me for anything
    2. The family lives closeby and we see each other every trip I'm down there
    3. He was a hotel worker, generally a nice person and is currently out of a job
    4. There will be no alcohol at the wedding (a strictly evangelico affair)
    5. It will be limited to about 100-150 persons

    My thoughts on this:

    From my European perspective he is not what I call close family and I'm inclined to say no (as a matter of principle) and will prob give the reason that prior business commitments will prevent my attendance at the chosen date.

    Questions to the board;

    1. What outlay would I be looking at?
    2. What would you do and why?
    3. How would you break the news?

  2. #2
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    IMHO.
    Please go.
    This is a great honour.
    You will honour your invitors and make them proud.
    Your commitments will be what you want them to be, from nothing up. Presents for the ladies would be nice but not obligatory.
    Don't give excuses and be present. Even if you are the only 'Gringo', this is an extremely important occasion and they will honour you as family.
    I don't understand the last question.
    Break the news to whom?

    If you honestly cannot go and would feel too uncomfortable, please talk to your host,

    I would definitely go, you will have a fantastic time and it will be in your memory forever!!
    An experience of a lifetime! Go be there for them!!


    Please.

  3. #3
    Moderator - North Coast Forum
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    do not go. say you are busy, have other commitments or you do not participate in religious affairs.
    he is out of work and wants the wedding for 150 people? you must be joking me. i can see where it is going - directly to "please help me a bit".
    fyi padrino pays for drinks, normally. there may not be alcohol but you'll still have to fork out cash for sodas and juices. and count yourself lucky if it ends there.
    also, i have beed to many dominican weddings. all were so darn boring i nearly broke my jaw yawning.

  4. #4
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    I have to agree with DV8 on this one. My sense is you are being asked to be Padrino because you have the deepest pockets.

    Acceptance of this comes with obligations. And I also agree that someone out of work wanting a wedding for 100 - 150 is outrageous.

    However, I have been to some FUN weddings here..........

  5. #5
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    I might be wrong but I was told that the padrino pays for the whole wedding.

    Mike

  6. #6
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    Thumbs up No!!!

    Everybody asks expats for money. Its the normal course of events in the DR. I learned how to say I am sorry but I do not have the money.
    After a little practice its easy and just rolls right off the tongue. Who can argue with a claim of poverty? Personally I would go and have a good time.

  7. #7
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    Don't go he is an Evangelico!! My family is full of them, nice people but are they are sooooooooo boring .

  8. #8
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    Wreaksum is spot on. I'm Dominican.

  9. #9
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    Set aside maybe €1000? Tell that that money is a gift (Or what ever sum you can come up with) and that is all you can afford now with the new baby and all. A campo wedding of an unemployed guy? Pretty nice wedding gift, let them spend it however they want to...
    the padrino usually buys the cake I have heard...

    You are not supposed to take on the whole shinding...

    HB

  10. #10
    Moderator - North Coast Forum
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    dudes, he DOES NOT WANT to go and you tell him not only to force himself to it but also to actually give something? you must be joking.
    i think life is full of things we "should be doing" as it is. why add to it? screw altrusim, time for some egoism. don't wanna go? don't go. leave partying to charlie sheen.

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