Dominican Funerals????

Ms.Melody21

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Jul 5, 2011
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I am new to the country and my "it's complicated" boyfriend's grandmother just passed away last week. I couldn't make it to the burial but his mother says I must go to the 9th day thing(for lack of a better word). I have no idea what to wear. What is custom for this type of thing? His sister says black and/or white.. I feel all my clothes are too flashy though. Does it matter??? I hear it is more like a celebration at this point anyway.. Any and all help will be greatly appreciated
 
Apr 13, 2011
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Have his mother or sister help you pick the most appropriate black outfit (added benefit is that they will most likely appreciate that you want their input on proper selection). Conservative but comfortable would be my recommendation. You are with the grandson, so you will be seen as part of the more immediate family. And, if it is out at a campo, then have comfortable shoes that you do not mind getting muddy if it rains. Since it is the 9th Day, then it probably will eventually turn into more of a celebration as the day goes on. People will be sharing a lot of stories and playing dominoes.
 

Hillbilly

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Jan 1, 2002
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Get yourself a white linen dress or a white cotton dress. Alternately, a black dress, as plain as possible. Little or no jewelry.
It is an important function.

HB
 

Matilda

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Sep 13, 2006
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You can also wear a skirt or trousers. In my experience there is more white than black but both are fine. Eat before you go so you will have something in your stomach to soak up the rum.

Matilda
 

bob saunders

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Jan 1, 2002
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Right from DR1: Dresses in subdued colors such as black, white, navy blue, grey, or cream will be worn by most women. A black skirt and white shirt with a pearl necklace is also suitable.
 

SKing

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Nov 22, 2007
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Make it casual though. When my son's great-grandfather died I wore what I would wear here to church- dress and heels- and was completely overdressed. Had to go back to the aunts house and change beforehand. Maybe it was the level of $$$ but the men wore jeans or slacks with dress shirts and a lot of the women had on jeans also with nice sandals and blouses but there were no heels and VERY few dresses

SHALENA
 

Ms.Melody21

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Jul 5, 2011
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Make it casual though. When my son's great-grandfather died I wore what I would wear here to church- dress and heels- and was completely overdressed. Had to go back to the aunts house and change beforehand. Maybe it was the level of $$$ but the men wore jeans or slacks with dress shirts and a lot of the women had on jeans also with nice sandals and blouses but there were no heels and VERY few dresses

SHALENA

thanx that is what i am worried about
 

ExtremeR

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Mar 22, 2006
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Right from DR1: Dresses in subdued colors such as black, white, navy blue, grey, or cream will be worn by most women. A black skirt and white shirt with a pearl necklace is also suitable.

That's more for the immediate family, not for the grandson's girlfriend, that's extremely conservative and maybe make way for some gossiping (ella era familia de la difunta? esta vestida como si fuera la hija). Business casual is good, black pants and white shirt, little to no jewelry and not a pronounced make up.
 

dv8

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Sep 27, 2006
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it all depends on a social level. or rather money. poorer people tend to wear whatever nicer clothes they have, they may also be coming from work or going there so they will wear what is best for that. i have seen women in leopard print tops and yellow jeans and no one bat an eyelid.
richer folks wear black and white but nothing too elegant.
my advice is dark (or white) trousers and white (or black) top. stick to those two colours and you cannot be wrong. flat shoes - there will be lots of standing.
also, prepare for the doom of boredom, church services are never fun here and you are expected to go with the flow: knee, stand, sit when everyone else does it.
boring, boring, BORED!
 

Hillbilly

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Nueve D?as is not just church...beyond a Mass...most of it is at the house of the deceased. And it is social. Good, really good advice here..

HB
 

mrchris74

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Mar 14, 2006
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I agree with dv8. Hopefully the OP knows her "its complicated BF" well enough to know what socio-economic level his family is on. Imagine the best outfit any of his sisters or primas could possibly wear and don't wear anything that would embarrass or out-do them: clothing, jewelry, shoes, whatever.

From experience I can say the rest of it is easy, just go with the flow. They won't expect you to know their traditions. It was similar to an Irish wake to me.