Back in NYC and Missing DR

KJS73

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Feb 25, 2011
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I spent the last several months in DR (primarily in Santo Domingo). Last week I returned to NYC and I fell into a depression. I'm finally coming out of it but I'm wondering if I should take the leap and live in DR. In June I begin the CELTA course (specializes in teaching English to adults). My future is wide open.

When I was in DR I felt I was really growing. Learning a new language and a new culture was exhilarating for me. I feel like I will grow more living in DR as opposed to continue doing what I'm used to in NYC. The thought of learning Spanish fluently really appeals to me. Here in NYC I feel kind of empty. Everyone seems so consumed with their careers and have little time to connect. I did that myself for many years and I'm tired.

I was wondering if anyone here experienced depression after returning home from DR. Some of my friends say that being away for several months has just caused me to be in culture shock and that it will pass. They say living in DR will be depressing. But they don't know what I experienced. I felt so alive even with all the problems in DR. Yes the poverty literally made me tear up at times, but that's reality. I don't want to live in a Starbucks bubble.
 

RonS

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Oct 18, 2004
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I remember feeling the same way when I returned home to the US from the DR for a long time after my first visit. I still get depressed on my way from SD to the airport on my way back to Philly. I also thought about taking the leap. But, I am glad I did not. As a more wise poster than me on the forum put it, living in the DR is very different than visiting/vacationing there. I don't think it's cultural shock. The DR is a lovely place and the people are wonderful. I think it's normal what you're experiencing. But, don't put your house up for sale just yet.
 

KJS73

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Feb 25, 2011
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Thanks Ron. Yeah I was thinking of just trying it out for a year. I wouldn't move all my stuff there. I'd like to try working in DR as an English teacher. I think most schools require a year. But yeah it's something I need to seriously think about.
 

Jetblue Flight 811

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Oct 17, 2010
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After my first trip Sept 2010 i was literally sobbing against the window of seat 23F on jetblue flight 812 and several trips later it still doesnt seem to get any easier......so yea i know how you feel......but i wouldnt want to live there and besides, Absence makes the heart grow fonder.....see you in Sept lol
 

JMB773

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Nov 4, 2011
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After my first trip Sept 2010 i was literally sobbing against the window of seat 23F on jetblue flight 812 and several trips later it still doesnt seem to get any easier......so yea i know how you feel......but i wouldnt want to live there and besides, Absence makes the heart grow fonder.....see you in Sept lol

WOW!!! That is the ONLY seat I will take 23F when I book my flight I make sure that one is not taken. In the last 10 yrs I have never sat in other seat, but on Spirit because they OVERBOOKED what else is new.

For the OP it will pass you have to get back into a regular routine and you are lucky I know people that would kill to live in NYC. I know what you mean about being tired. A GREAT weekend for me is staying home all day watching sports, sleeping, ordering a pizza, looking out the window. The work week is just so STRESSFUL!!!
 

KJS73

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Feb 25, 2011
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I've been in NYC since 1994 and feel like a change. First I'll complete CELTA course and see what the job prospects are in NYC for teaching ESL with CELTA certificate. I may be more employable outside the United States.
 

gringobachata7

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Sep 19, 2009
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I spent the last several months in DR (primarily in Santo Domingo). Last week I returned to NYC and I fell into a depression. I'm finally coming out of it but I'm wondering if I should take the leap and live in DR. In June I begin the CELTA course (specializes in teaching English to adults). My future is wide open.

When I was in DR I felt I was really growing. Learning a new language and a new culture was exhilarating for me. I feel like I will grow more living in DR as opposed to continue doing what I'm used to in NYC. The thought of learning Spanish fluently really appeals to me. Here in NYC I feel kind of empty. Everyone seems so consumed with their careers and have little time to connect. I did that myself for many years and I'm tired.

I was wondering if anyone here experienced depression after returning home from DR. Some of my friends say that being away for several months has just caused me to be in culture shock and that it will pass. They say living in DR will be depressing. But they don't know what I experienced. I felt so alive even with all the problems in DR. Yes the poverty literally made me tear up at times, but that's reality. I don't want to live in a Starbucks bubble.

I know the feeling, that happens to me every time I come back. It is almost as if I fell in love with the country and than am separated. Just plan a date when you are going back, that helps. If you are going to teaching English, there are countless jobs in the Dominican Republic and you could live there for some time.
 

gringobachata7

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Sep 19, 2009
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You can also make dominican friends in the USA and get connected with them and their local community while you are waiting to go back. Also, save money while you are waiting so that you will have even more fun when you go back. The DR is fun as long as you have at least a little bit of money but with no money it changes from a paradise to a hell where one can starve to death in a heartbeat. Try to go back and live like their upper middle, rich or middle class lives and go back in comfort with saved money from while you were waiting to go back. Keep in close contact with the people you know there online and overt he phone. All those tips help, I am very experienced and know the feeling.
 

KJS73

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Feb 25, 2011
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I have to say lye last week has kind of felt similar to what it's like when you break up with someone you are still in love with. It's interesting to have that same feeling with a place, but yes gringobachata7, I have that feeling you described.

I almost bought a ticket for September around my birthday, but I'm not sure if I'll be working in the US at that point. It's best I finish the CELTA program before making any decisions.

And yes I have been keeping in touch with people in the DR. We are very lucky to have technology that makes communicating so easy. I do have very good friends in NYC but I'm just not feeling it. I noticed people don't smile much in NYC, including me. There were lots of smiles in DR.

I don't want to sound like I don't appreciate NYC. I've lived there since 1994. It was a more interesting place in the 90's. Now it's a bit too generic for me. Yes there is still a lot of diversity, but something seems to have been lost with all these hipsters and Duane Reades, Starbucks and banks on every corner. I miss some of the grittiness and uniqueness.
 

Reasonable Man

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Dec 23, 2011
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I have to say lye last week has kind of felt similar to what it's like when you break up with someone you are still in love with. It's interesting to have that same feeling with a place, but yes gringobachata7, I have that feeling you described.

I almost bought a ticket for September around my birthday, but I'm not sure if I'll be working in the US at that point. It's best I finish the CELTA program before making any decisions.

And yes I have been keeping in touch with people in the DR. We are very lucky to have technology that makes communicating so easy. I do have very good friends in NYC but I'm just not feeling it. I noticed people don't smile much in NYC, including me. There were lots of smiles in DR.

I don't want to sound like I don't appreciate NYC. I've lived there since 1994. It was a more interesting place in the 90's. Now it's a bit too generic for me. Yes there is still a lot of diversity, but something seems to have been lost with all these hipsters and Duane Reades, Starbucks and banks on every corner. I miss some of the grittiness and uniqueness.



I couldn't agree more, the New York City that I grew up loving in the 90's is pretty much gone. It's nothing like I remembered my childhood being.
 

KJS73

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Feb 25, 2011
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My obsession has not lifted. I am constantly thinking about DR. I feel I need to follow my gut and stay in Santo Domingo long term. I start my CELTA course in two weeks. Hopefully they can provide me with some leads on a good school to teach English.
 

InsanelyOne

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Oct 21, 2008
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Did you ever like DR or did you become tired of it after living there?

Ah... don't mind me... I just feel the need to whine every once in a while. I live here by default as it's the only place my partner and I have found that allows us to legally live together. (We are a same-sex bi-national couple. American/Trinidadian). We've lived in 4 countries in the last 7 years.

It's not that I dislike the DR as much as I prefer the US.
 

KJS73

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Feb 25, 2011
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Ah... don't mind me... I just feel the need to whine every once in a while. I live here by default as it's the only place my partner and I have found that allows us to legally live together. (We are a same-sex bi-national couple. American/Trinidadian). We've lived in 4 countries in the last 7 years.

It's not that I dislike the DR as much as I prefer the US.


Love is certainly a great reason. I imagine there are many who are in DR for love.
 

CLEGALBAP

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Mar 24, 2006
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trust your judgment to thine ownself be true

Love is certainly a great reason. I imagine there are many who are in DR for love.

believe in yourself set a goal make a plan execute your plkan attain your goal then set other goals you have one life to live and life is for the living being happy i suspect if not key is way up there with health all love
:bandit::beard::laugh::lick: