Stupid Gringo Mistake #1

Well I almost got deported before I got through the POP Airport because i missed the part where you can't bring handcuffs in. I swear I looked at all the illigal items but obviously not. I was worried about the cats in the baggage area dying or paying for duty on the MANY household items my Wife INSISTED on bringing but nope, they asked "You Police?" I said no then they all got serious with the hancuffs in the suitcase (yes i know I'm an idiot!) Detained for 2 hours while calling Santo Domingo. Thought I would get a cavity seaqrch but i was lucky on that one! When they got me alone they asked "used for bedroom?" I replied yes and they seemed to like that :cheeky:

The whole time I was being asked questions the men let my Wife walk around get the rental car, get the animals water etc...They said I was done here in a serious Voice and I thoguht they meant the DR!! That I had to go back to Canada and they laughed and sent me on our way. The good thing is no Duty charges and all 4 animals LOVE IT IN THERE NEW HOME! So if you want to distract from duty charges bring in an illegal item to distract them ;-)
Loving it here on my second day with it seems to be our Housekeeper and her extended Family. Not really used to the housekeeper thing and feel really uncomfortable about them doing everything for us but I'm sure I will get used to it!

Easton :pirate:
 

Givadogahome

Silver
Sep 27, 2011
4,397
2
0
you do know women here will willingly have sex with you, there no need to chain them up to stop them wriggling free.

I got it once for bringing in a bullet belt with grenade buckle.

Glad you enjoying yourself, did you get to keep the cuffs?
 

SantiagueroRD

Bronze
Apr 20, 2011
766
1
38
Good Evening and Welcome to the DR. It is my opinion if you want to avoid Stupid Gringo Mistake # 2 get and keep some distance from your housekeeper and her extended family.
 

Givadogahome

Silver
Sep 27, 2011
4,397
2
0
He said his wife was with him. It is a more personal thing than finding chicas apparently.
Der Fish

I'm a bit of a kinkyaphobe myself, once had a partner tie me up and pour candle wax on my bits, reflex reaction kicked her in the face and bust her lip, never enjoyed the pain as a pleasure thing.
 

mountainannie

Platinum
Dec 11, 2003
16,350
1,358
113
elizabetheames.blogspot.com
Good Evening and Welcome to the DR. It is my opinion if you want to avoid Stupid Gringo Mistake # 2 get and keep some distance from your housekeeper and her extended family.

that would cover about the first 25 mistakes

watch Downtown Abby for tips on the staff treatment.. then go to upstairs downstairs

you have to REALLY keep a stiff arm and learn here.. they are NEVER responsible for anything that gets broken or ruined because the spanish has a bad reflexive verb. Dishes break themselves. Dark clothes reach out and pour cholorox on themselves.

the police in Santiago were just sitting around the station because the posters of the criminals all had them out looking for themselves
 

dv8

Gold
Sep 27, 2006
31,266
363
0
perfect. another perv.

exactly what we need here! welcome!

:bunny::bunny::bunny:
 

DRob

Gold
Aug 15, 2007
8,234
594
113
I'm assuming giveadogahome was joking ;-)
No interest in the ladies here.

No problem, we're going to assume you're either gay (and on the down low), or you and your wife are sharing the DR1 account. lol.

I've known guys that shut down their entire lives virtually overnight to move to the DR, but you're not feeling the women. LOL!
 

mike l

Silver
Sep 4, 2007
3,157
466
0
Well I almost got deported before I got through the POP Airport because i missed the part where you can't bring handcuffs in. I swear I looked at all the illigal items but obviously not. I was worried about the cats in the baggage area dying or paying for duty on the MANY household items my Wife INSISTED on bringing but nope, they asked "You Police?" I said no then they all got serious with the hancuffs in the suitcase (yes i know I'm an idiot!) Detained for 2 hours while calling Santo Domingo. Thought I would get a cavity seaqrch but i was lucky on that one! When they got me alone they asked "used for bedroom?" I replied yes and they seemed to like that :cheeky:

The whole time I was being asked questions the men let my Wife walk around get the rental car, get the animals water etc...They said I was done here in a serious Voice and I thoguht they meant the DR!! That I had to go back to Canada and they laughed and sent me on our way. The good thing is no Duty charges and all 4 animals LOVE IT IN THERE NEW HOME! So if you want to distract from duty charges bring in an illegal item to distract them ;-)
Loving it here on my second day with it seems to be our Housekeeper and her extended Family. Not really used to the housekeeper thing and feel really uncomfortable about them doing everything for us but I'm sure I will get used to it!

Easton :pirate:

Did you bring the furry coverd hand cuffs so when your wife wriggles in pleasure she won't get a bruise or a scar on her wrists or does she want scars and pain so when you release she is then the mistress with the leather and the whip for being a bad boy...please send $9.95 to my Paypal account for the answers

DR1 sex chat ....Colombia here we cum !
 

Castle

Silver
Sep 1, 2012
2,982
1
0
I'm a bit of a kinkyaphobe myself, once had a partner tie me up and pour candle wax on my bits, reflex reaction kicked her in the face and bust her lip, never enjoyed the pain as a pleasure thing.

Did she untie you after that, or let you there to die from starvation?
 

frank12

Gold
Sep 6, 2011
11,847
29
48

Wow...that was interesting:

"Days before the storming of the Bastille on July 14, 1789, Sade was transferred at night to a prison for the insane. He wrote that he “wept tears of blood” over the manuscript’s loss, and he went to his grave in 1814 without knowing its fate.

But it was recovered, sold, resold and then published for the first time by a German doctor in an error-filled version in 1904."
 

Criss Colon

Platinum
Jan 2, 2002
21,843
191
0
38
yahoomail.com
I worked in a US hospital before I moved here.
I got 4 "Restraints" to bring down.
They are So much better than "Cuffs" (Which Dominicans call "Esposas", or "wives" in English!)
They are lined with faux sheep fur, adjustable, and easy to wash the blood and tissue out. :devious::devious::eek:gre::lick::lick::lick:
I also brought dozens of "Toys".
I had to keep bringing more of them.
Everytime I introduced a "Dominicana" to a "Mami's Little Helper" she insisted that she take it with her.
I learned to bring a lot of batteries with me too. They are very expensive here.
CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC
 

mountainannie

Platinum
Dec 11, 2003
16,350
1,358
113
elizabetheames.blogspot.com
I worked in a US hospital before I moved here.
I got 4 "Restraints" to bring down.
They are So much better than "Cuffs" (Which Dominicans call "Esposas", or "wives" in English!)
They are lined with faux sheep fur, adjustable, and easy to wash the blood and tissue out. :devious::devious::eek:gre::lick::lick::lick:
I also brought dozens of "Toys".
I had to keep bringing more of them.
Everytime I introduced a "Dominicana" to a "Mami's Little Helper" she insisted that she take it with her.
I learned to bring a lot of batteries with me too. They are very expensive here.
CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC

have you men ever heard the expression TOO MUCH INFORMATION

really..
 

mountainannie

Platinum
Dec 11, 2003
16,350
1,358
113
elizabetheames.blogspot.com
have you men ever heard the expression TOO MUCH INFORMATION

really..

I am sure that many of you are very decent guys .. just seems that you are determined to show off the fact that you actually HAVE had sex, ARE having sex, and CAnnot get enough sex. It makes the entire board seem like a whore mongers dreams... and while i know that many of you came down here for that. .. well/../ this is not that sort of Forum..

So maybe it would be better if you could remember that there are grandparents in the room as well. And great great aunts.

maybe that will help???

STupid Gringo mistake 1 through 100

Treating women as SEX objects alone with no Latin capacity for even pretending that you might have feelings for your partner