So...WE are not going to the DR for Christmas afterall. I was just there for a family wedding at an AI in Puerto Plata the end of October and we were planning to return for my husband's family reunion on New Year's Day, but things got complicated and difficult so he is going for a quick trip to make the reunion.
Here's my thing. I have tried for a decade to wrap my head around this whole 'present' culture; with inlaws and their families reaching out to tell us what to bring them for a present; and them expecting elaborate presents. Don't get me wrong, I ADORE my inlaws (most of them, which I think is perfectly normal) and recognize it as a cultural difference. We help with household expenses and his mother's medications. And of course, like I would do in my own country, we typically do Christmas presents if we are there for the holiday.
This year, WE are not there. And my husband doesn't arrive until 3 days AFTER Christmas. We have been picking up things here and there since our last trip (If I see stuff on sale I know anyone in my family would like, I pick it up) and that stuff will be taken to them. This week, my husband's childhood best friend asked him to bring him a stand mixer. Cost? Almost $200. Then his sister (who is middle class, business owner and whose husband never wears anything unless it is Ralph Lauren or Burberry or what have you), texts me today asking for a pair of Nike sneakers for their son, men's size 10. This same sister already knows about the cute shirts and dresses and shoes we've already purchased, that will be delivered when he gets there on the 28th. The sneakers he wants are $255.00.
Here's my dilemma. I have no problem ignoring the 'asks'. We buy what we want to buy for them and when we want to buy it. And I make no apologizes. However, I have a hard time not getting enraged - especially when I know this sister has money, yet asks for this stuff! Not that I begrudge anyone's kid anything...but this sister knows there are so many others in the family that have nothing. Yet tries to put her kid at the top of the list.
I'm almost happy I won't be there to have to deal. How do you ladies handle this kind of a situation? I can't be all alone in this, can I?
Here's my thing. I have tried for a decade to wrap my head around this whole 'present' culture; with inlaws and their families reaching out to tell us what to bring them for a present; and them expecting elaborate presents. Don't get me wrong, I ADORE my inlaws (most of them, which I think is perfectly normal) and recognize it as a cultural difference. We help with household expenses and his mother's medications. And of course, like I would do in my own country, we typically do Christmas presents if we are there for the holiday.
This year, WE are not there. And my husband doesn't arrive until 3 days AFTER Christmas. We have been picking up things here and there since our last trip (If I see stuff on sale I know anyone in my family would like, I pick it up) and that stuff will be taken to them. This week, my husband's childhood best friend asked him to bring him a stand mixer. Cost? Almost $200. Then his sister (who is middle class, business owner and whose husband never wears anything unless it is Ralph Lauren or Burberry or what have you), texts me today asking for a pair of Nike sneakers for their son, men's size 10. This same sister already knows about the cute shirts and dresses and shoes we've already purchased, that will be delivered when he gets there on the 28th. The sneakers he wants are $255.00.
Here's my dilemma. I have no problem ignoring the 'asks'. We buy what we want to buy for them and when we want to buy it. And I make no apologizes. However, I have a hard time not getting enraged - especially when I know this sister has money, yet asks for this stuff! Not that I begrudge anyone's kid anything...but this sister knows there are so many others in the family that have nothing. Yet tries to put her kid at the top of the list.
I'm almost happy I won't be there to have to deal. How do you ladies handle this kind of a situation? I can't be all alone in this, can I?