Page 3 of 3 FirstFirst 123
Results 21 to 25 of 25

Thread: Joke of The Day

  1. #21
    Silver
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Posts
    3,456
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default

    Two reasons redneck murders are so hard to solve :

    - All the DNAs match

    - There are no dental records.

  2. Likes cavok liked this post
  3. #22
    Silver
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Posts
    2,186
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default

    Do you know what you get when you play a country song backwards?

    You get your house back, your car back, your wife back back, your job back, your dog back.

  4. Likes malko liked this post
  5. #23
    Silver
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Posts
    2,186
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default

    Military Words Of Wisdom

    1. Don't draw fire - it irritates the people around you - Advice to the new guy.

    2. If the enermy is in range - so are you. Infantry Manual

    3. Tracers work both ways". Army Ordinace Manual

    4. Don't ever be the first, don't ever be the last, and don't volunteer for anything". US Navy

    5. The only time you have too much fuel on board is when you are on fire.

    6. Five second fuses last about 3 seconds. Infantry Manual

    7. Nothing is so good for the moral of the troops than to occasionally see a dead general". Field Marshal Slim.

    8. Friendly fire - isn't.

    9. Airspeed, altitude, and brains. Two of these are always necessary to successfully complete the misssion. Basic Flight Training Manual

    10. If it's stupid but it works - it isn't stupid. Navy Ops Manual

    11. Having lost sight of our objectives, we need to redouble our efforts.

    12. Any ship can be a minesweeper - once. Navy Ops Manual

    13. If you see a bomb technician running - try to keep up with him. Infantry Journal

    14. Cluster bombing from B-52's is very, very accurate - the bombs always hit the ground.
    US Air Force

    15. Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword, obviously never encountered automatic weapons. General MacArthur

    16. A Purple Heart just proves you were smart enough to think of a plan, dumb enough to try it, and lucky enough to survive.

    17. It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over an area you just bombed.
    US Air Force Manual

    18. If you find yourself in a fair fight, you didn't plan your mission properly.

    19. A good battle plan that you act on today can be better than a perfect one tomorrow.
    Gen George S. Patton

    20. When the pin is pulled, Mr. Geneade is no longer our friend. USMC

    21 Without ammunition, the Air Force is just an expensive flying club

    22. You've never been lost until you've been lost at Mach 3 SR71 test pilot

    23 We are not retreating. We are advancing in another direction

    24. Coffee tastes better if the latrines are dug downstream from an encampment.
    Last edited by cavok; 11-10-2018 at 10:55 AM.

  6. Likes melphis liked this post
  7. #24
    Silver
    Join Date
    Apr 2014
    Posts
    3,155
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default

    Q: If you attend a cockfight, how do you know if a Polak is there?
    A: He's the one with a duck.
    Q: How do you know if an Italian is there?
    A: He bet on the duck.
    Q: How do you know if the Mafia is there?
    A: The duck wins.

  8. Likes malko liked this post
  9. #25
    No fui yo!
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    3,495
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default

    Did you here about the Pollack that studied two weeks for a urine test...

Page 3 of 3 FirstFirst 123

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •