Bobby Lee and the gorilla

Jun 18, 2007
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www.rentalmetrocountry.com
A small zoo in Arkansas obtained a very rare species of gorilla. Within a few weeks the gorilla, a female, became very difficult to handle. Upon examination, the veterinarian determined the problem. The gorilla was in heat. To make matters worse, there was no male gorilla available.
Thinking about their problem, the Zoo Keeper thought of Bobby Lee Walton, a redneck part-time worker responsible for cleaning the animal cages. Bobby Lee, like most rednecks, had little sense but possessed ample ability to satisfy a female of any species. The Zoo Keeper thought they might have a solution.
Bobby Lee was approached with a proposition. Would he be willing to mate with the gorilla for $500.00?
Bobby Lee showed some interest but said he would have to think the matter over carefully. The following day, he announced that he would accept their offer, but only under five conditions:

"First", Bobby Lee said, "I ain't gonna kiss her on the lips." The Keeper quickly agreed to this condition.

"Second", he said, "She must wear a 'Dale Earnhardt Forever' T-Shirt." The keeper again readily agreed to this condition.

"Third", he said, "you can't never tell nobody about this." The keeper again readily agreed to this condition.

"Fourth", Bobby Lee said, "I want any offspring raised as Southern Baptist." Once again it was agreed.

And last," Bobby Lee said, "I'm gonna need another week to come up with the $500.00.
 

CristoRey

Welcome To Wonderland
Apr 1, 2014
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Unlike some (snowflakes) people who are easily offended, us rednecks
have thick skin. We enjoy a good laugh and don't feel the need for "safe spaces"
no matter who's doing the offending. Enjoy!

A man from the Welfare department was interviewing a redneck women ...
... who had requested assistance and he was reviewing her form.
He noted that she stated that she had three sons, but only has one name listed, "Leroy".

"Yes", she replied, "All three sons are named Leroy."

"Why would you do that?", inquired the government worker.

"It makes it much easier to get things done.", was her reply.
"Leroy, time for bath." And they all would get in the bath.
"Leroy, time for supper." And they all would come to the dinner table.

Amazed, the government worker then inquired how did she get personal
if she wanted to talk with just one of her sons.

"Oh that's easy", she replied. "I just call them by their last name."
 

bienamor

Kansas redneck an proud of it
Apr 23, 2004
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Damn George Foreman is a redneck. 5 sons all named George. all got the same last name though guess don't count.