To all you expats in need of therapy

Chirimoya

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Dec 9, 2002
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This is the country we have chosen to live in, and although we love it most of the time it would be dishonest to say that we are delighted with every aspect of it. From time to time - especially when driving in the city - all cultural sensitivity and tolerance goes out of the window and we curse the day we ever set foot here.

May I suggest the following exercise as therapy for exasperated expats? Simple - you make two lists. Things about living in the Dominican Republic that you love and the things you hate. Do the 'hates' first to get your frustrations off your chest and then move on in a serene fashion to the positive.

Here are mine.

What I hate - in no particular order:

Early morning phone calls even on a weekend, when no-one has died
Motorbikes, especially the one without a silencer that delivers the paper at 4:30 am
Universal lurid piety in contrast to universal lurid practice
Hot humid summers
Ice-age a/c
The abonimable lighthouse
Being served ultra-sugared coffee
Being called 'Americana' despite repeated explanations
Driving technique - that unique but fatal combination of stupidity and selfishness, and what about all those brand new cars without indicators?
Concepts like feo, ordinario, cabello malo and all other manifestations of rudeness, ignorance and racism


What I love - in no particular order:

Attitude to kids - when the sight of my two-year-old reduces sane men and women to jibbering idiots
Kids' attitude - the children I know here are much nicer than my friends' kids back home
The treatment I got when I was pregnant - no need to queue (stand in line in American English) at the bank!
Saman? beaches - need I say more?
Non-smoking culture - even as a 'social smoker' I appreciate the fact that most public spaces are smoke-free.
Not needing to be stick-thin to be treated like a normal attractive woman (and before you men all start - I'm not fat, just not stick-thin)
Can be 'blonde' without spending a centavo in the sal?n!
Sunny warm winters
Cerveza bien fria
Tropical fruit for breakfast
Old-fashioned courtesy (although it magically disappears when behind steering wheel)
The colours people paint their houses, especially blackberry-yogurt pink
Bizarre slogans on guaguas
Amapolas in bloom
The coffee
Unconditional hospitality, especially in the pueblos and campos
Servicio a domicilio
Dancing
The richness of the language
Male and female beauty, of all colours and shapes
Music - but not saccharine dirge merchants like Marco Antonio Solis (I know he's Mexican but Dominicans have taken him to their hearts) full-volume, repeat-play on long-distance guagua rides
Last but not least - DR1 - a newly discovered treat


What would yours be? I haven't included most of the other obvious candidates in the 'hates' list: the rubbish, social inequality, los apagones, corruption, clientilism, the noise, the machismo... but these were all things we knew about from the start and shouldn't really need to complain about, it's too boring. Not to say that the excesses of all the above do not grind us down from time to time.

I guarantee you that the list of things you love will be twice as long. If it isn't, time to take stock and wonder if you really should be here. Step two (optional) would be to draw up a list of good things and bad things about returning to your country.

If this helps just one of you distressed folks - or even just makes you laugh - it'll all have been worthwhile.

Chirimoya
 

MaineGirl

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Jun 23, 2002
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Great concept, these lists. I've done it before. (Not for living in the DR, but in another steamy, verdant place.) I enjoyed yours!
 

AtlantaBob

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Jan 2, 2002
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Thanks a lot Chiri,

your list kind of made me homesick for the DR. I miss the little things like the fruit, the coffee, the scenery and of course the female beauty. Today, up here, we might get a temp high in the 60's (F), woo hoo!! Might even be able to ride my motorcycle some. Ciao
 

JOHNNY HONDA

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Sep 25, 2002
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Re: Thanks a lot Chiri,

AtlantaBob said:
your list kind of made me homesick for the DR. I miss the little things like the fruit, the coffee, the scenery and of course the female beauty. Today, up here, we might get a temp high in the 60's (F), woo hoo!! Might even be able to ride my motorcycle some. Ciao
Gee BOB I ride my Bike every day,does that cure your homesickness.BTW the way I get out my hostility on bad days is to scream and give the finger to every idiot with a drivers licence whos hell bent on comiting suicide and taking me with them.
:cool: :bandit:
 

MommC

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Mar 2, 2002
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With a predicted low of -13 C wind chill to -27C today what I love most about the DR is that I can go there!!! (17 days and counting!!!).
No matter how many things I hate about it I won't stop coming as long as I am able.....because what I love about it far outweighs the irritants!!
 

ShoortyLov

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Nov 15, 2002
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My "Good" list definately overcomes the "bad" list...I appreciate my "dominican" freedom too much to even let myself concentrate on all the defects my country has...Today I woke up at 5:30am to find .5" of snow on top of my van, which kept on coming down while I had to spend 10 minutes trying to clean my windshields...and it looks like the whole week will stand the same at an avarage of 20 F. :( Only 10 days left, to get out of this misery....:D
 

WendyPavo

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Dec 13, 2002
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Although I currently sit in my office in Colorado, working at an altitude of 10,000 ft., with more than 6 feet of snow and 3,000 skiers less than 1 mile from me, these lists oughta be not only the perfect way to break-up my day, but also a breeze!!

Things that drive me nuts absolutely BONKERS about the DR:
- power outages while showering or cooking
- cold showers
- mosquitoes and ants
- erratic and cocky motoconcha drivers
- the lack of mufflers on motoconchas
- the complete absence of customer service (as it relates to sense of urgency)
- the inability to use tap water for drinking or cooking
- the lack of fresh vegetables
- boxed milk
- the lack of consideration for sleeping people
- parasites (as they relate to the human intestines)

Things that have prompted me to move back to the DR:
- non-conformity to designer clothing, cars, and elitist social groups
- bachata and merengue music
- sancocho and fresh lambi (conch)
- simplicity of life
- the genuine compassion and kindness of the people
- local coffee and ginger tea
- apple bananas at roadside stands on the way to Santiago
- tile floors
- street parties/festivals
- fresh cooked fish served at a simple folding table on the sandy beach of Playa Grande
- sun and sand
- lack of serious criminal activity
- ?locals? prices
- lush, green vegetation
- the Metro ride from Puerto Plata to Santo Domingo

?. and oh so much more!!!
 

Criss Colon

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Jan 2, 2002
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Very nice "lists"!

I would like you to clarify two items for me.#1,From the "bad list."Lack of fresh vegetables".Where do you go in the DR that doesnt have fresh vegetables?The markets are loaded with fresh produce of all kinds!..#2,From the "Good List","Lack of serious criminal activity".Do you read the DR1 "newspapers" everyday,or watch TV?This country is loaded with "Criminal Activity",lots of it by the politicians!Crisccccccccccccccccccccccc
 

WendyPavo

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Dec 13, 2002
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Chris,
To clarify my stance on the ?lack of fresh vegetables?, I suppose that I should disclose the following facts:
1) my produce buying experiences are from the north shore (Puerto Plata).
2) I don?t classify root vegetables as ?vegetables? ? I classify them as starches
3) I don?t classify moldy, bug-infested, or wilted vegetables as ?fresh?
When I say ?fresh produce? I?m referring to leafy greens (red/green leaf lettuce, spinach), ripe tomatoes (as in the kind that have actually reached a brilliant shade of ?red?), asparagus, zucchini squash, etc.

And to clarify my stance on ?lack of serious criminal activity?, I suppose that the words ?violent criminal activity? would have better described the kind of crime that I consider to be lacking in the DR (or at least compared to the levels of violent crime in the US). I?ve never seen a Dominican become aggressively and/or physically violent against another, nor have I EVER felt as though I was personally at great risk for aggravated robbery, assault with a deadly weapon, car-jacking, drive-by-shootings, or rape (or at least not to the extent that I am at risk in the US!!!).
:cool:

Wow, there is snow much snow falling outside right now!! We're expecting 6-8 inches throughout today and tonight!!
As much as I've come to love my tropical life in the DR ..... I still think that falling snow is so peaceful and beautiful!!!
Perhaps tomorrow will be a "powder day" for us skiers!! ;)
 

MommC

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Mar 2, 2002
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'Red" tomatoes don't exist in the DR because if you wait for them to get red they're rotten. Tomatoes mature much faster in the heat here......
As for violent criminal behaviour....we were mugged by machete yielding muggers on a local tourist street in the tiny village of Juan Dolio.....doesn't get much more violent than that if you ask me!
 

Criss Colon

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Jan 2, 2002
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I really like the "SuperMercado National" stores!

You might want to take a trip to Santiago during your next visit.They are "Spanish" owned and run.Unlike the Power Companies(Spanish Too) they are quite nice.The Santiago Store has a "Cuesta" hardware store too.(They feature US Company"ACE Hardware" products)They have all the "local" fruits and vegies,as well as US imported vegies.They have lots of European and South American products as well.You might even run into "Hillbilly" in the produce dept.as I did about 5 years ago! CRIS
 

Pib

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Jan 1, 2002
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Re: I really like the "SuperMercado National" stores!

[B]Criss Colon[/B] said:
You might want to take a trip to Santiago during your next visit.They are "Spanish" owned and run.
Sorta. I don't know if the 3rd generation still counts as Spanish. But I agree with Criss that it is the best supermarket chan in DR. My cousin, a chemical engineer specialized in food processing claims that it is the cleanest, best supermarket and that they fully comply with food safety standads and GMPs.
 

Pib

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By the way, somebody in the chat asked me last night if I have considered moving out of the DR. Upon reading this thread I think I can sort out the reasons why I don't want to.

Friends and family (Duh!)
Fresh fruits street vendors all over town (Quick, cheap and healthy snacks).
Coffee, with lotsa sugar (Can I have some coffee in my sugar please?)
The weather (I was designed for the tropics)
Small island, can't get lost (I have a lousy sense of direction)
Island big enough (won't get claustrophobic)
People still shoot random smiles at perfect strangers
People are funny
Hate is not ingrained in our mentality
The beach
Silly kids doing funny things
Domincan girl power (literacy and universy graduates higher among women. Go girls!)
Being feminine doesn't make me weak (Rather the contrary)
Cooking is still important to us, I like real food.
Italian-like respect to mothers.
Old people are not discarded.


Things I hate:
THE FRIGGING NOISE!
Pollution
Corruption
Poverty (not the poor)
Nosy people
Illiteracy
 

earosemena

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Aug 18, 2002
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Things I love:

Fresh fruit and smiles at bfast.
Little girls in school uniforms and tight braids tipped by bows waiving as you go by.
The green of the mountains, the very blue of the sea and the sky,
the white and silky sand.
Palm trees as they sway in the wind.
Rain against a tin roof.
The unconditional love I'm always offered when I'm there.
Mangu.
Bachata and merenge.
The nuances of skin colors.
The unimportance of age.

Things I hate:

Corruption.
The lack of human rights.
The exploitation of Dominicans by the more privilege peers.
Sankies and grillos.
That some people I love are so poor.
The lack of opportunity.

Wow! You can see how I tilt.
 

Chirimoya

Well-known member
Dec 9, 2002
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On the subject of good quality fresh veg

Just in case this helps: as some of you probably already know, there is good quality organic produce - Campo Sano/Finca El Japones - available here in the DR. In the capital Supermercados Nacional and Bravo are selling them.

I have no information about the north of the country, but the people at Mercado Ecologico might be able to help. Their e-mail is fama@codetel.net.do

Chirimoya
 

Pib

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I live in the street of Mercado Ecol?gico :) Next time you are in the hood give me a call and I'll invite you over for coffee.

You can find Campo Sano in any supermarket of the various local chains. The freshest veggetables are at El Nacional though.



PS. I suppose you're talking about the Mercado Ecol?gico in front of the radio station.
 

Chirimoya

Well-known member
Dec 9, 2002
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Calle Leonor Feltz, isn't it? It would be a pleasure - send me an e-mail or a PM with your tel no.

Most weeks I go there on Friday afternoons to pick up my order, not sure if I'll be going this week as we're off to the beach, but hopefully some time soon.

Chirimoya