What's the deal??

Dominicana_NJ

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Feb 22, 2003
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What I'm about to write in here I know is going to receive a lot of heat and alot of people telling me that I don't know what I'm talking about!! But the whole point to these forums is to state your opinion or your beliefs even if it is wrong!

I know I haven't been part of this forum for a long time, so please save your "newbie", "rookie" etc. cracks for another time because frankly I don't really care! I 'm writing because I've been observing these posts for a while now and I've finally gotten to the point where I'm actually offended!

I recieved a private message from a member telling me and I quote "Thankx God I'm not Dominican" (thats what he wrote) now I am Dominican so I'm thinking what the F*** is wrong with this guy. I 'M DOMINICAN is he crazy, so I ask him why does he thanks God for not being Dominican and he says because he wouldn't want to have some of the qualities that Dominicans have!! I don't know if it's just me but how ignorant is that??

Then I thought to myself what the hell is so bad about being Dominican?? And I realized that anyone that is not Dominican and reads some of the posts in this site would be scared! My question to you guys is?? WHY?? Why do you degrade Dominicans as much as you do?? Why is it that all Dominican men have to be con artists?? Why is it that only a few maybe just a handfull are good?? With all the negative things I read about DR on this site I don't understand how all you even want to go there or in some cases are there?

Yea I know I'm going to hear about the "it's just joking around" "you can't take it seriously" It's all sarcasm". I'm sure it's everything you guys say but how can some of you judge Domincans as a whole? Dominican people are just that people same as you white people, same as the africans, chinese, mexican, cuban, etc. You will find sanki's in all those countries you will find hookers in all those countries. So why degrade for trying to make thier ends meet?? I'm sure if you all where put in thier situations you would probably be doing the same or worse. You shouldn't be so quick to judge!! While I do know that some of them are con artist why talk so much trash like it's only in the DR that that will happen!!

Ok so bring it on lets' hear the cracks about I don't understand!! And it's all in fun and every other excuse just come with them....I just want to know why?? I mean maybe I'm wrong so please enlighten me........Oh and there is no need to be rude please! And in the end If I'm wrong I'll say I'm wrong!
 

bob saunders

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Jan 1, 2002
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Nope, you are completely right, it's just easier for some people to focus on the negatives rather than the positives. Certainly there are bad apples in every country and every culture but remember this is a Dominican Forum so the focus is on Dominican issues and you can hardly expect everyone to only comment on positives, that would be incredibly boring.
 

Robert

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Jan 2, 1999
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Your not wrong Dominicana_NJ.

The problem is that many tourists/expats only come into contact with Dominicans on the lower end of the socio-economic scale. As I have said in the past, I wonder who they think works in all those offices and in some of those multi-story high tech buildings we have here in SD?

Don't take it personally, it's not stupidity, just ignorance...
 

AZB

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Jan 2, 2002
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Many foreigners who live here or come to visit choose to live in touristy areas where they can be in constant contact with the hookers and sankies (for women). These people are not true represtatives of the dominican population. These foreign folks frequent, whore houses and carwashes looking for the pleasures of the flesh. Their close dominican male friends are either pimps or con artists. The only dominican families they know are of the hookers they date or the resort workers who are 100% chopos and have sisters who are sluts. One thing they all have in common, they are all poor and I mean dirt poor. So there you have a dominican reality from a foreigner's mind: dominican women are all hookers (or atleast 90%) and almost all dominicans are poor.
These same studs don't don't go to santiago because not a sinlge girl even notices them. same holds true for a 30 plus years old fat foreign woman, they never get noticed by a santiaguero.
Their reality only stems from their experiences in DR.
So take it easy and do what I do, feel pitty for their ignorances.
 

Dominicana_NJ

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Feb 22, 2003
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Yes! Thank you all for understanding what I meant. I'm glad I'm not alone in what I feel.

Robert you are 100% correct in pointing out who is it that works in those offices and in those multi-story high tech building.

AZB I agree with you and pity is all I will feel for them!!
 

Amber

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Jan 24, 2003
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Dominicana, I hear you. It is difficult to read some of the things here without getting offended. But after you keep reading; you begin to see the whole point. What we need to do is enlighten, not make the ignorance worse. That's what is happening here. People who visit the island come here with questions and they are told what the real deal is. If you fequent certain places, you will only meet a certain type of people, just like anywhere else in the world.
And yes, there are a few here who are beyond help in the I am better than thou department, but most are pretty nice.
 

Jan

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Jan 3, 2002
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I live in Zona Colonial in a mostly Dominican neighborhood and I love it. Here I come across all types of people, rich and poor, and I like them all...for the most part. It bugs me also the way people sometimes puut down the Dominicans. But for me they are the main reason I fell in love with this country. The people are great!
I feel sorry for the people that come here and only see the resorts. They have no idea what they are missing.
 

karmatico

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Feb 25, 2003
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Yeah, that's right Dominicana_NJ... don't let that get under your skin...that's all they want to...think of it... if he hated dominicans so much he wouldn't be in a dominican forum...That kind of people are just No-self esteem humans that needs other poeple attention to feel alive...that's sad, but don't give 'em the attention they need and they will just fade away...

100% agree with Pib....
 

Jon S.

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Jan 25, 2003
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Dominicana, the people on this site are providing a service by telling foreigners the truth about DR. When I first started looking at the forums, some of them kinda shocked me - but then i started thinking about when I used to live down there and it all rings very true, specially for me since I was there for 6 years.

Some people take it to the extreme and express their extreme point of view but that's all on them. If you're smart enough and I'm pretty sure you are, you should be able to distinguish between the extremists and the ones giving real advice on this site. Besides, no one can take away my pride in being a Dominican, regardless of what they say. Those are my 50 cheles.
 

MommC

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Mar 2, 2002
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Excellant replies.......

and all right on target!!
Even though I have lived here winter for a long time I often state that I live in a "tourist" area (and a small one at that!) and what AZB, Rob, and the others have said is correct!
I don't meet or get to know the people who work in the office towers in SD. It is only in the past couple of years (since we started golfing a lot at the country club) that we have been meeting people who are NOT at the lower end of the socio/economical ladder!
Has my opinion changed??? Of course!! You need only read some of my early posts to see that!
Remember that a lot of the posts/questions on this message board have to deal with "love" or "lost loves" as relates to resort workers!!
 

Petaka

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Nov 8, 2002
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We are all elitist

If it means we prefer to mingle with people of our own group and socio-economic background.
 

Petaka

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Nov 8, 2002
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Hey, isn't this suppose to be the sexual forum? Anna , how do you want me to wake you up? :)
 

Petaka

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Nov 8, 2002
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I guess I'm gonna need a big brush.
Never mind, I'm going back to the TV. :bandit:
 

Winker

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Mar 3, 2003
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Anna, you said it was not until you started playing golf you began to meet people. Is there anyway those of us who can only visit once a year can get off the resort rollercoaster? I met a young man who did not work on the resort, has a full time job, university degree and yet I still felt I could not trust him because of the sterotypical information we hear in Canada as well as the information presented on this site. I even asked a Domincan girl and she told me not to trust anything he says. It was like I was interogating him when we went out and even now I have not given him my address, phone or email. In fact if he turns out to be a decent person I have probably succeeded in giving him a bad opinion of Canadians. We are all nervous, uptight and suspicious. Advice on how to walk the fine line between offensive behavior on our part and protecting our own interest?
 

hollywood north

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Dec 11, 2002
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Part of the reason some of these 'opinions' surface are because people generally stick to their AI resorts and hardly leave.

They don't get to share a meal (sancocho) with a family who prepared this specially for their visit.....or sleep in a beautiful mahogany 4 poster with a net over top......while Mom and her two beautiful children share another bed because you are the guest.....

They don't know what it feels like to be dancing in the main room of the house with curious and friendly neighbours looking in or coming over to see who the extranjera is.....

or to hold the newest member of the family - a sweet little boy of one month.

or drink the amazing spicy tea prepared by an elderly woman, whose toothless smile for your appreciation of her libation is etched in your memory....

The people that come to get their needs taken care of could be in ANY country....
for every one that slams your beautiful country there is someone that loves it and the people as much a I do.
 

AnnaC

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Jan 2, 2002
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I don't play golf so it wasn't me. I'm the moderator not Ann Landers. Long distance relationships are very difficult. Use the same method of meeting someone as you would at home. Don't be afraid just be aware.
 

Escott

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Jan 14, 2002
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Being suspicious of people is not always wrong. Seems to be a very good policy to follow in the DR.

I don't feel the way a lot of people here do about Dominicans. Hell I guess I don't feel the same negative feelings that people feel about tourists either. The caveat is that I don't stay at all inclusives and haven't been around those that pray on the tourists. I mostly hang out with my friends while there and take everything with the grain of salt it deserves.

Even though I am a man I have been able to see the ride some of these women get taken on just from reading these boards. How many times has a stary eyed woman or man for that matter been on here telling everyone how in love with a guy or gal that they met on their week in the DR? How many times has another woman on here told this woman the size of the guys pecker and how much they had been taken for?

How many guys here are also supporting the love of their life in the DR while another guy here is poking the same woman while the person is back in their home country? I know of at least one right here on this board.

So, Dominicana, I believe that these warnings and conversations are warranted. These guys/gals are good at their professions and people shouldn't get ripped off either of money or feelings because it just isn't right.

I don't think it is wrong for women to pay for sex just like I don't think it is wrong for a man to pay for sex. Consenting adults have the right to do whatever they feel like doing as long as they don't hurt themselves, others and especially me.

I just think that you need to know what you are getting into and that you get the bargain you bargained for and not get surprised.

Hence I believe that whilst these discussions go WAY over the top at times and at times I personally find them offensive, I believe in the right for these people to help others from getting hurt.

Whew... Longwinded