10 traits of a great boyfriend

anitabonita

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Mar 6, 2003
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i ripped this article from askmen.com..

they should mail this out to every man on earth!

10. You listen
When words come out of her mouth, do you actually pay attention to what she is saying or do you mumble agreement while tuning her out? A good boyfriend is an active listener, meaning he asks questions and doesn't just wait for his turn to speak.

Showing her that you have a genuine interest in what she has to say means you respect her opinions and find her interesting -- two things that will please any woman.

9. You're spontaneous
A great relationship is one that never feels stale. So be unpredictable and mysterious in order to keep her guessing (and on her toes).

Whether you whisk her away to a Mexican resort at the last minute or show up on her doorstep, for no apparent reason, with Chinese takeout, always try to add some real excitement to the romance. Women love to be surprised, to be swept away in as many different ways as possible. It's up to you to come up with the ideas.

8. You satisfy her bedroom desires
Saying sex is important would be a gross understatement. A good boyfriend must satisfy his woman's every romantic need (and, yes, she should reciprocate). Remember that there's a difference between making love just for the sake of it, and being passionate about it. That means never skipping foreplay , being considerate about her needs and not tuning her out afterward.

7. You're self-confident
No woman wants a passive, submissive man who compromises his personality to make her happy. Retain your personality, stand by your opinions, and don't give in too easily. Show her that you are strong and confident.

6. You notice the small stuff
Did she suddenly get highlights in her hair, shed a few pounds, or buy a new dress? Pay her a compliment. Show her that you are attentive and don't miss life's more subtle details.
 

anitabonita

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Mar 6, 2003
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cont'd

5. You give her space
Trust is the foundation of any good relationship. Part of that entails giving her the freedom to have a life separate from yours without asking 20 questions or having jealous fits, and knowing that she's not taking your trust for granted.

Keep things in perspective; would you like a girlfriend who kept tabs on every move you made? Probably not, and the same goes for her. And always look for a silver lining; in this case, you'll have time to hang out with your buddies, and have something to talk to her about the next time you see her.

4. You respect her (and her family)
It's important to avoid letting your ego get the best of you, so if your mentality is stuck in the '50s, you must adjust to changing times. You have to understand that she's an equal part of the relationship, so appreciate her company.

Likewise, try to embrace her family early on. In addition to scoring precious points, being kind and courteous toward her parents is a good way to show that you're serious about the relationship. This includes, but is not limited to, bringing the parents thoughtful little gifts every so often, and planning activities that include her whole family, like a picnic. Of course, I'm assuming that you've already survived that dreadful first meeting.


3. You better yourself
Demonstrating what a positive effect your woman has had on you is a fantastic way of gaining leverage. Whether you're getting yourself back into shape, improving your vocabulary, or forgetting about the television long enough to take dance lessons with her, it doesn't matter. Improving yourself is a great way of letting her know she deserves the best, and she'll be flattered that she was the inspiration behind your desire to aim higher.


2. You challenge her to be better
Likewise, your role in her life should be just as beneficial. You should inspire her to make changes that reflect the positive effect you've had on her. If, for example, you see her letting a great talent go to waste, encourage her; maybe that's all she needs. Don't be afraid to sign her up for an art class, or push her to pursue a career you know she'd be good at. The fact that you care that much about her well-being will make her want to keep you around longer.

1. You make her feel beautiful
Reminding her how beautiful she is comes with making her feel good, and makes you a poster boyfriend. Best of all: simplicity and honesty are all you need. Buy her, say, a card that expresses your appreciation, compliment her at odd times, and if you feel that she's the most gorgeous creature you've ever laid eyes on, be sure to let her know. Women want to look good for their men, and proving to her that you only have eyes for her will be a validation of that.


Keep each other happy

What it all boils down to is making her feel good about herself and appreciating her in an unselfish way; find success in this department, and she will love you eternally. More importantly, however; if I've just finished describing you and she still takes issue with the little things, then maybe it's time for you to reevaluate how good a partner she really is.
 

Robert

Stay Frosty!
Jan 2, 1999
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The world has way too many magazines! I'm glad I live in the DR and not in the "real" world ;)
 

Lore

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Mar 9, 2003
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Good words to live by Anitobonita!
However, applying them is always the difficulty. If only each sex could be perfect for the other, then the world would be a much different place, however, without these goals to strive for, then we are all pretty well "stuck in the mud". I must say the thread about what men want has been pretty revealing. Unbelievably, not all men just think about sex, conversely, no all women want just "cuddling". We can get pretty kinky too guys!!!. The ones that know this don't bother to post because they are already grinning. :) All the rest, I hope, fulfill all their wants and desires and I sincerely hope you/I/we satisfy all those you mention above. At least we'll have fun trying!!!
 

arenas809

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May 22, 2002
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blah blah blah blah...

everyone, especially the guys, puts their best foot forward in the beginning, then after the other party knows they "have" the other person, that's when you start to see that foot has some bad nails.

Bottom line is relationships are about convenience.

What can I get out of you, without giving up too much from myself.

Yes their are hopeless romantics out there searching for their better half, but everyone settles, why?

They don't want to be alone, which is all about themselves more than it is about the other person...

Hmm...just realized something, 10 traits of a "great" girlfriend coming from Tony C in 5, 4, 3, 2....
 

Lore

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Mar 9, 2003
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Funny arenas809.
I guess by your comments it is a fair warning to all women, and I believe a point well taken, to check out both of the man's feet before "jumping" to any conclusions. Hey, just as long as there is no nail polish and five on each, that is a very good basis to start a great relationship. Then add the above ten.....;) Also, you are very right, who of us truly wants to be alone and maybe you do "settle" - I'd rather call that "compromise". Both have to compromise in order to make any relationship work because as much as we think about ourselves, none of us are perfect. Both of us have to think about what the other really wants - hence this post by Anitabonita and the other by Anna of what men really want. These are only goals (and from the posts, I believe truly heartfelt). All we can do is honestly rate ourselves as to how each of us really measure up, and decide for ourselves where we can improve.
 

Tony C

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Jan 1, 2002
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Arenas,

You know me all too well!

Instead of my list I'll just reply to Anita's 10 ways.

10. I was watching "sports center" Were you saying something?

9. Well me and the buddies were having a drink when one of the guys said that he knew of a great strip club in Las Vegas. Next thing we knew we were on a plane. Sorry i missed your sister's wedding.

8. You know, sometimes a quickie is just the ticket

7. Do I look at other women? Duh!

6. Sure you can go out with your friends. Just be home in time to have dinner waiting for me when i get home

5. Space? yea sure! Whatever! Don't let the door hit ya in the ass on the way out.

4. I am dating you. Not your whole family ok?

3. Dance lessons? Yea! Right! Like that is going to happen!

2. You know honey you have been putting on a little weight!

1. Of course your beautiful. I picked you didn't I. I don't date skanks.
 

jose?to

The thread finally snapped...
Jun 19, 2002
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anitabonita,

Girls may say they want a good guy, but they REALLY love bad boys.

-Jose?to
pariguayando my way to last place
 

bobnoxious

*** Sin Bin ***
Jan 2, 2002
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Anita, my dear...

This list is not meant for men, but for someone named "PuppetBoy". I believe that these 10 rules only apply to men? who are desperate, but not serious. Women appreciate men who are "firm" in their needs, wants, and desires (and then give their entire paycheck up to her). Now that's commitment!!!
 

AZB

Platinum
Jan 2, 2002
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Real men don't need stinking rules.
Real men only know one thing:
"Its our civic duty to bang the booty".
 

mkohn

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Jan 1, 2002
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"duty", "booty"
with a little work, that could be a poem.
Some women like poets!
mk
 

anitabonita

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Mar 6, 2003
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see the light

see the light guys.

how many 'bang the booty men' are in long lasting sustainable relationships? i will admit that a lot of men aren't ready to take it to the level described in that article... actually if you check the website askmen.com...you will see the magazine is very realistically geared toward men... it even gives advice on how to keep two women at the same time! the traits described above are not manipulative jedi mind tricks used to hold on to women... they are behavioral indicators that apply to any man who is serious and in love with his mujer.

regardless of whether you choose to admit it, we all know that truly loving someone requires more than a big stiff one.

so don't fake the funk muchachos. ;)

anita
 

Criss Colon

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Jan 2, 2002
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You have compiled the larges pile of "Horseshit" on DR1 in resent memory!

It does however make clear the real problem in relationships! Many people enter a relationship to feel "Whole"(I resist saying that I enter a relationship to "Feel Holes!")I digress! Their mate fills their empty space! "BullShit!" Marry someone like yourself! It is not your mates marital duty to make you happy,and visa/versa!You should be making yourself happy.They should be making themselves happy! That way you don't,and never should,blame your mate if you are unhappy! Marry someone that is fun to hang around!You enjoy their company.You feel ok when you don't see them for a few days.
Now the sex part! It is not your partners responsibility to make you have an orgasm! Newsflash Ladies,you have a huge part to play in your own sexual satisfaction!Those fingers of yours can be put to good use,so can that vibrator,and "Rubber Toy"!Your mate can be "busy" in one area of your beautiful body,and you can be working with the "Special Needs" group!
There is a lot of ways to "Skin-A-Cat",a "Pole In The Hole!" is not the "HolyGrail"!
So make yourself happy,together!
Don't marry someone dependent on you,you can NEVER satisfy their dependence!
Women,never marry a man as a "Project"! "He just needs the love of a good woman to straighten him out!"Never happen ladies,he just becomes a bigger looser,and then you hate him for it!
Men never marry a woman because she gives you the greatest sex you ever had!Lasts about as long as being happy about a new car!Then you want another "New Car"!
Marry someone "funnier" than you are!
Men,always pick a retaurant you like! If your lady friend is a potencial mate,she can say,"That sounds good,but I would love Mexican food tonight,lets go to "Poco Loco" for some "Cadillac Margharitas"and "Pollo Limon",I'll give you a special desert at my house after dinner! This woman has a chance! She says what she wants,knows what she likes,and she is not afraid of offending your "Male Pride"! She will be the same in bed! Ask for something"Greek" for desert!!!!! If you get it,go get the liscense!!!!

CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC
 
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Larry

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Mar 22, 2002
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Anitabonita

Anita,
Truth is when a guy behaves exactly like a woman wants..the realtionship is doomed to fail.Lucky if i lasts 2 months.She will quickly become bored and her natural instinct for a badboy will take over.She will yearn for a little "wildness", a "rebel", a guy with a backbone.Someone that will keep her on her toes and bring a little excitement into her life. The guy you described Anita...before too long would bee seen as too nice and boring with no backbone. This is female nature. Dont blame me for stating the truth. It would be easier for all of us men if you girls made more sense. I have learned long ago that if you are constantly trying to please a woman it is like chasing after a rabbit..youll never catch it. If you just be yourself and do the manly things that make you happy but piss her off..she will respect you and love you a whole lot more.This is indisputable.
Larry
 

Jan

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Jan 3, 2002
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Santo Domingo Este
www.colonialzone-dr.com
Not all women want a bad boy!!
I had one and divorced him. I want a man that is a man for sure. But alos carring and makes the marriage/relationship fun. There is nothing wrong with thinking of the other person. If you think of him/her and the opposite then I think it would be a great thing. If you love and respect and make your partner the main person in your life and they do the same, how can that be bad?
I'm not saying to lose yourself. Thats not a good thing. You can have a life together and yet be seperate people. But mutual respect and caring is'nt losing yourself..its making your other half and yourself better people.
It takes a real man to treat a woman like a real woman. It doesn't make you a woos or a worm. If a woman wants a bad boy ,to me, she doesn't completly respect herself and why would you want that.
You need to treat a person the way you would like to be treated and a little attention now and then is a good thing!!
(ok. here I am again seeing the world thru rose colored glasses and I hope I never lose my glasses!! jejej)
 

jose?to

The thread finally snapped...
Jun 19, 2002
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Hell freezes over! I agree with Larry.

Jan and Anita,

You may say you want a good guy, but after all's said and done, women want bad, REALLY, REALLY bad boys.

And you don't have to go far to see it; DR1 is a good example where the bad boys are celebrated and admired by the goddesses and cheerleaders.

-Jose?to
Uneducated, but telling it like it is. Pariguayo extraordinaire.
 

spankinsyLv

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Sep 21, 2003
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hahah, anitabonita's right. every girl wishes for a guy like that, even me, but i'd want to get into arguments sometimes... or else i'd be bored with my relationship. fighting and making up makes you stronger. it's always good to lack somewhere.i have friends that get mad at their bfs for the heck of it because they're bored with their relationships. that's what you get when you never get into an argument with your boyfriend. and relationships aren't all about getting laid... i don't think men would ever understand women
 

Jon S.

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Jan 25, 2003
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CC hit the nail on the head once again...........funny post headline........here's something for everyone to look at in ESPN.com the war of the sexes continues................and it's written by a really hot, football-loving, intelligent chick!!!

Anyways, anitabonita, even you wouldn't want a man like that magazine describes, you'd get rid of him in an instant! Magazines are supposed to be informative but nowadays, being the complete opposite of being informative is the norm, not the exception.........I have a few magazines myself but using common sense in a relationship helps out more than what any simple magazine article may say. Relationships are an ever-changing constant, common sense and understanding would be the greatest thing that both people in any relationship could have.

There's my 2 cents worth
 
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