My life has been explained to me!

Hillbilly

Moderator
Jan 1, 2002
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The reason I am living and the way I live has just been explained to me. This revelation is not from the Gospels or the Book of Mormon or the writings of B'hai A'luja or the Torah or the Koran...

Nope, just from this simple story:


On the first day God created the dog. God said, "Sit all day by the door of
your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will give you a
life span of twenty years." The dog said, "That's too long to be barking. Give
me ten years and I'll give you back the other ten." So God agreed.

On the second day God created the monkey. God said, "Entertain people, do
monkey tricks, make them laugh. I'll give you a twenty-year life span." The
monkey said, "How boring, monkey tricks for twenty years? I don't think so. Dog gave you back ten, so that's what I'll do too, okay?" And God agreed.


On the third day God created the cow. God said, "You must go to the field
with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of sixty years."


The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty
years. Let me have twenty and I'll give back the other forty." And God agreed again.


On the forth day God created man. God said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and
enjoy your life. I'll give you twenty years."


Man said, "What? Only twenty years! Tell you what, I'll take my twenty, and
the forty the cow gave back and the ten the monkey gave back and the ten the dog gave back, that makes eighty, okay?"

"Okay," said God, "You've got a deal."

So that is why the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play, and enjoy
ourselves; for the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family; for the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren; and for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.


I am currently in the Monkey stage and loving it. See? It is so easy.
Damn, I really appreciated that e-mail!

HB :):):):):)
 

Wales

English Twit!
May 21, 2004
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Life was just explained??

Larry said:
Somehow, I am still stuck in the first 20.??!!?

Larry
Wow!! In the latter part of the first twenty I slept very little. Thought I drove better with two or three half pints of beer in me (that's all I could afford) Lived in London England on 750 pounds per month. The next 30 I ignored my family, missed my children growing up, built a business, drove a Rolls Royce ( without the beer) - by then I realised I didn't drive better- For the next ten I had by now realized that there was more to life than money. work and material possessions, I'd probably got all I wanted. Then in the last year of that decade I lost my most precious, My wife died suddenly whilst we were on holiday in Spain. I'm now mid way in the what you call the monkey stage. My daughter is pregnant but lives in Spain. I am now married to a wonderful, wonderful, lady whom I knew many, many years ago - that's another story no one will believe and we are coming to live in the Dominican Republic very soon with our two little girls ( 4 legged ones ) they'll do the barking- and I'm going to go back to stage two am I crazy or what!!.
I'll keep you updated after the next thirty .
Regards
Wales
 

chuckuindy

Bronze
Mar 8, 2004
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Bark?

I am in the stage where the only thing that make me bark is my novia in the DR. At home I am in the begging stage.

Charlie
 

p1atan0

New member
May 25, 2004
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Bible

God created man in his immage...
so if you spell god backwards you get Dog.
I guess men are all dogs
ha ha ha ha
lmfao