Okay, I'll tell my tale, against my better judgement...
In 1998, I went on my first trip to the DR with a friend. It was a wonderful week in "paradise"...I stayed at the Casa Marina in Sosua, and met some wonderful people. I noticed how happy everyone at the resort seemed to be...smiling, singing, dancing, and I thought "these people are so poor, but they are so rich in life...so uneducated, but can speak 5 languages...so happy, but have so much to be sad for..." (enter rose-coloured glasses)...I didn't meet anyone terribly special...I've never been the "one-week-stand type" (although I envy those that are...I was quite enamoured by how beautiful the Dominican people are) Even though Hurricane George ruined a couple of days on that trip and was a little scary, I knew that I wanted to learn more about the country, the life, and what made the Dominicans tick. Well, I was in for quite the education!
I came back from the DR, and all I could think about was the next time that I would be able to make it back. After breaking a long-term engagement, and being real tired of my job (8 years of Accounting for Chrysler Canada can do some serious mental damage!), I decided that I had little to stay here for...wouldn't it be the experience of a lifetime to move and start over fresh? I decided to work real hard, save as much as I could, and travel to the DR. I'd had the idea to start a pub crawl running from POP to Cabarete, and that could provide some income while I volunteered teaching English to Dominicans that wanted to learn and give themselves a better life. So that's what I did...I worked hard, and saved, and a year later, a friend and I were on our way to travel the Dominican, Puerto Rico, and then come back to the DR to start the pub crawl...she only took a 2-month LOA from her job, so once we got back from PR, she was on her way back to Canada, leaving me there to start this "new life". I'd already met JJ from JJ's Auberge...very kind man who took the time to educate me on Dominican life...he'd lived there quite a few years and was formerly a US lawyer. He helped find me a cheap place to live, taught me what I needed to know in the Dominican language, and was always there to offer "fatherly advice".
One day, my friend and I saw a ballgame going on in Sosua, and decided to stop. I was pointing out to my friend how beautiful the pitcher was... I went on and on, (in English of course, because I thought no one could understand me) the way girls talk, saying real bad things.... He was looking at me, I at him, and finally, he came up and introduced himself, in English! I am sure, to this day, although he denies it, that he understood most of what I said... Anyways, he asked me out...I said no, because I didn't want a boyfriend, I wasn't into falling in love in the DR because I knew I'd someday return home to Canada. Soon after, my friend and I left to go home and make dinner. We were on our way back to the Brittania when we saw they were still playing (double-header? or maybe they just always play there until the power goes out?)...I said to my friend, "let's just stop and say hi". So as we were entering the field, Angel turned around, and saw me...I was looking at him, he was looking at me, and I tripped! Yep, fell flat on my face!!! I was so embarrassed, all I could do was laugh...he came running, helped me up, and told me that was a sign, I had to let him take me out...so the next day, we went to the beach together, and talked until 5 in the morning...he was too scared to try and kiss me...I cannot believe what a gentleman he was, compared to what I'd seen from other Dominican men.
The next day, he came to my place, cooked me dinner, and told me he had to leave, to go to Church (!)(he was Pentecostal, and attended the night service 3 nights a week...that scared me...), but would return afterward. He returned, we watched TV, and he kissed me for the first time...I was like, WOW.
Anyways, the relationship progressed, we moved in together, and cannot remember having one fight in all the time we lived together, yet I am sure we had them...then things happened, I got sick, my father was not well...with a sad and heavy heart, it was time to go home...before I left, Angel proposed...I told him that I didn't know, I would have to think about it...I cried and cried, and when I returned home, I returned a very different person...Dominican life had changed me forever...and of course, all I could think about was Angel. My parents had their doubts, of course, they would do anything to protect their "little girl", but they saw how much we cared for each other from all of Angel's phone calls and faxes, and so on...now, they totally love him...
I decided I couldn't live without him...I returned in September and married him...sigh...you know, for a man, he's pretty extraordinary...when we got married, all I had to do was show up...he had every detail planned and paid for...even down to my hair appointment! Like, how lucky am I??? Anyways, we didn't start the Immigration papers until December, because we really couldn't decide what was going to happen...Angel was very happy in the DR, and so had I been...we decided on Canada (and are still struggling with that decision... are we doing the right thing?), and 5 months later, Angel's papers were ready. They'd done the visa for his son at the same time, but we decided with a baby on the way, we needed to wait for a year to get Angel settled in Canada first before we brought his son (we thought he was being taken care of by his mother...wrong decision...). Anyways, going to the DR was the best thing I could've ever done in my life...I've got the man of my dreams (I am more in love with him now than I have ever been), and 2 beautiful sons who have completed my life in a way that nothing could've. We have a network of Dominican/Canadian couples that are great to have around...we really understand each other, and some of them have become better friends than ones I've known all my life...
Having lived in Sosua, I could tell you horror stories, but I have some even worse Canadian-man-stories than I have of Dominican men. I know some of them who are bad people...Angel's cousin is a very notorious sanky in Sosua...he will stop at nothing to get what he wants and do what he wants...he owns a condo and a car, paid for by his girlfriends...he is married to a German woman, but will never be able to immigrate to Germany because of drug offenses... However, I will never be a person that tells you not to fall for a Dominican man, because I did, and have gained the love of my life, his family who are equally incredible, and his son whom I consider my own. We have our problems like everyone does, but the good times far outnumber the bad.
And if there's any doubters out there as to whether I am still wearing those rose-coloured glasses, ask the moderator...I met Anna before my second trip to the DR, and she's been through everything with me, every step along the way...
