what are my rights?

ada

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Feb 2, 2005
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I am an american citizen living in NYC. I married a Dominican man in the Dominican Republic 3 years ago and have 2 children with him. I've decided not to move to DR and we've decided to just call it quits. When he was getting our house built I gave 10,000 US dollars. Now that we are getting a divorce and he is sellling the house I want some of the money that he gets for the house. What are my rights as his wife? Although I do not live there I think I am entitled to something being that I am raising our children. We are amicable to eachother but money always brings out the worse in people. Therefore, I would like to be prepared in case he tells me he is planning on giving me zilch. Thanks for your advice.
 

paddy

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Oct 4, 2003
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ADA...GET A LAWYER. amicable only lasts so long..dominican men don't have good track records when it comes to being a responsible parent..matter of fact ..lots of men in this world have this problem. out of sight..out of mind..will be the flimsy excuse that he will feed himself to justify not giving you and HIS children a fair shake. good luck to you.
 

Dolores1

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May 3, 2000
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You are 50% owner of the house. Dominican law also stipulates that both parents are equally responsible for the maintenance of the children. But with your husband living in the DR, the costs of maintaining the children may be beyond the budget of your husband and this may be difficult to enforce by you. If you are on good terms, probably you could cover their costs in the US and send the kids for summer and Christmas vacations to their dad and he will cover their costs here.
 

Hillbilly

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Jan 1, 2002
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A lot will depend on where you get divorced

If you get divorced in the US, the Dominican courts will enforce child support payments to be made by your ex, even if he lives in the DR. They may not be what thay could be in the states but something is better than nothing.

You will have to get a Dominican lawyer to get a judge here to issue the necessary papers but it is done all the time.

And that house is surely 50% yours so you should get your $10 thousand plus a bunch of added value....

Like the man said--get a lawyer.

HB :D:D Been thourgh this once....
 

paddy

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Oct 4, 2003
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ada...that sounds nice..but?????????????????????????????????????
your children are real young....i assume...and you're going to have a long road ahead of you..whatever you decide now will determine whether that road is cobblestone or paved. whatever happened between you two..happened..don't victimize the children more than they have been already. you being able to feed ,clothe and educate these children is going to cost money..and theres never enough...on a personel note..my mother raised my brother and i alone..the rainbow was always black and white..to this day i think about it..love just went so far.
 

Dolores1

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May 3, 2000
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Hillbilly said:
If you get divorced in the US, the Dominican courts will enforce child support payments to be made by your ex, even if he lives in the DR. They may not be what thay could be in the states but something is better than nothing.

You will have to get a Dominican lawyer to get a judge here to issue the necessary papers but it is done all the time.

And that house is surely 50% yours so you should get your $10 thousand plus a bunch of added value....

Like the man said--get a lawyer.

HB :D:D Been thourgh this once....

What about going through the quickie divorce way? In the long run, wouldn't that cost less than the tediousness of a Dominican divorce. Since she is a foreigner, she can go that way, too. See http://www.dr1.com/divorce
 

paddy

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Oct 4, 2003
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dolores..quick divorces are ok if there's no children..property..support..ada has to get all her ducks in a row..because this guy she married is dominican..does that let him off the hook? financially..i'm sure the answer is NO...she gave him $10.000 to build the house..what did he give? or did he just point and say "put it here"..all these things and more have to be worked out..you just don't pick up your marbles and go home..like it was all a bad dream. my heart goes out to this woman and the millions of women all over this planet who find themselves in this predicament..
 

Dolores1

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May 3, 2000
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paddy said:
dolores..quick divorces are ok if there's no children..property..support..ada has to get all her ducks in a row..because this guy she married is dominican..does that let him off the hook? financially..i'm sure the answer is NO...she gave him $10.000 to build the house..what did he give? or did he just point and say "put it here"..all these things and more have to be worked out..you just don't pick up your marbles and go home..like it was all a bad dream. my heart goes out to this woman and the millions of women all over this planet who find themselves in this predicament..

Sometimes it is better to move on. The emotional cost is not worth the bad blood. US$10,000 is not much money. Three years ago it was at most RD$250,000. That doesn't go far. With the sale of the house, she could be getting back her money many times over. My suggestion is that she try to make sure that she does get the real 50% of the selling price. If he returns to the DR the bottom line is that even if he wanted to, with few exceptions of a person working in a dollarized job, he will not be able to contribute much monetarily to the children, so the bad blood is not worth it. It would be best to stay on amicable terms.
 

Hillbilly

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Jan 1, 2002
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Sorry D but I really gotta disagree this time

The deal is:
1) she gets a divorce in the US. The US judge ajudicates custody and child support.
2) She gets a DR lawyer and files her papers in a DR court.
3) a DR court will accept the US court's decision but it can listen to the husband explain and reduce his payments to something reasonable, but he pays and under a court's jurisdiction. If he misses a payment the lady has recourse.

Cordially, HB :D:D
 

Dolores1

DR1
May 3, 2000
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Hillbilly said:
The deal is:
1) she gets a divorce in the US. The US judge ajudicates custody and child support.
2) She gets a DR lawyer and files her papers in a DR court.
3) a DR court will accept the US court's decision but it can listen to the husband explain and reduce his payments to something reasonable, but he pays and under a court's jurisdiction. If he misses a payment the lady has recourse.

Cordially, HB :D:D

If he misses a payment, could that mean he could be denied a renewal of his US tourism visa, in the understanding that he has one, and not a US residency through his wife? Could the US residency be revoked? Is missing payments on child support matters for affecting his right to travel to the US?

On the other hand, what if the US court determines that she should pay alimony to him. Apparently she is the person that earns the most. What if he claims alimony alleging that she is the one abandoning him?
 

Hillbilly

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Jan 1, 2002
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Interesting questions, probably

better for the DR Law expert of answer, but I'm betting that non-payment will entail DR citations, DR jailing etc. Nothing to do with his US visa privileges.

The decision as to who pays what to whom, a lot depends on whose lawyers is better. In one case I know about, at first the woman, earning six figures was going to pay. She ditched her lawyer, got a better one, appealed and got him, who made half of what she did, pay child support!!..Even after he came home to the DR!!. And the DR courts upheld the decree.!!!


HB, the voice of experience :(:(:(:(
 

DianaC

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Jan 8, 2005
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Generalizations..... enough already....

paddy said:
..dominican men don't have good track records when it comes to being a responsible parent...


I have to disagree with the above statement. Generalizations are usually unfair to a huge portion of the group being generalized about.

I have had the priviledge of knowing a number of Dominican men with children (both here and in the Dominican Republic), and I know only one that does not step up to the plate and put his child(ren)'s needs before his own. (And he lives here not there.) The men that I am referring to are married with children and/or separated/divorced with children. Dominican law requires that the fathers support the children or face jail time.

Maybe I am fortunate in knowing a special group of Dominicans, but I believe them to be part of the majority and not of the minority. It's unfortunate that it is human nature to focus/comment on the negative rather than the positive. (BTW: that's my opinion based on experience, and I am entitled to it.)

Don't get me wrong, I know that there are "dead-beat dads" in every country in the world... but to generalize as per the above quote is simply unfair.
 

paddy

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Oct 4, 2003
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ADA...GET A LAWYER. amicable only lasts so long..dominican men don't have good track records when it comes to being a responsible parent..matter of fact ..lots of men in this world have this problem...
if you're going to quote me...try to be accurate.
 

ada

New member
Feb 2, 2005
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Thank you so much for all your advice. I will definetely get a lawyer. I hope everything does go smoothly. Just a little more background. My husband makes very good money in Dominican Republic. He has his own business, a dental laboratory, that makes good money. As of now he sends me 300 US$ a month and I always take the kids to him for Christmas and a month in the summer, until they are old enough to go by themselves for the whole summer. Regardless that he has sent me money all this time I will get a lawyer because it's better to be safe than sorry. The money I get for the house will be for a down payment to buy something here so it is for his kids also. Again thanks for your help :)