Funeral Questions

Andrea P

New member
Feb 9, 2006
2
0
0
Hello everyone,

I have a somewhat odd situation. I am writing from the United States, though my post concerns a woman from the Dominican Republic.

A few days ago, one of the custodial staff who worked in our office building passed away. Most people in the office did not know who she was, but as an office we would like to send our condolences to her family here in the United States. We collected some money to send her family flowers and a card.

Unfortunately, we only found out after collecting the money that any condolences we would want to send would have to go through building management and then through the company she worked for that building management sub-contracts to clean our offices. They will not give us her address for privacy concerns, though they are willing to pass condolences along. This nixes the idea of sending her flowers, as they will have to change hands twice to get to her family.

We had then thought to send a Visa or American Express gift card with the money donated along with the card. I know that in the United States, this would not be thought of as completely improper, especially if an explanation accompanied the card. However, we were not sure if this would be viewed as insulting or improper to a family from the Dominican Republic.

Do you have any insight on this situation?

Thank you for your time and thoughts!
 

Ken

Platinum
Jan 1, 2002
13,884
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You never have to worry about offending a Dominican by sending money.
 

samanasuenos

Bronze
Oct 5, 2005
657
18
0
Send the money.

My experience with all struggling immigrants is that the value of a dollar is high and always appreciated.

I can't imagine anyone being offended. Unless they are some of those super-rich Dominicans. And it sounds otherwise from your post.

Also, I would make sure to take the time to write out your condolences, and maybe have them translated into Spanish. If any of you have photos of the lady with or without you that are nice, those might be nice to send along.

Ultimately, with loss - we do what we can to comfort the survivors and to let them know how much we will miss the one who passed away.

Give them the money, but not alone. Send it Western Union, (if they are in the Dominican Republic) but try to send condolence cards as well. Maybe send a message that a card will follow, so they know to look out for it. (The card cannot be too decorated or elaborate. Don't go with simple and boring yuppy Martha Stewart style. )

If they live in the USA, I don't know how to decide who in the family gets the cash - her husband, if she has one......

Good luck!