One of the things that I have noticed and to me is very weird, is the fact that MANY Dominicans, when they marry a foreigner or a Dominican living in the US, they expect that person to help their immediate family with their hardships.
I personally know a person, a friend of over 20 years, who married a Dominican living in the US and from the "get-go" she told him that "they" needed to help her parents and sibblings back home. She even told him to think of it as paying another monthly bill. For years, this situation have created so many problems between them that I really do not know how in hell are they still together. He believes in "let then earn it" and she believes in "it's our job to help them".
I mean, if the mother and father are old and can't work, sure, but why support people that are in their 50's and a whole bunch of "vagos" that all they do is wait for their hard-earned dollars every month.
When I come to this site and I see SOME members talking about helping their girlfriend's or spouse's families, I can not help but "shake my head". I mean, I am all for helping people but going into a relationship were it's expected to help someone, in my book, it's insane.
Sometimes I put myself in some of these people's shoes and I come out with the same conclusion: "I must be the biggest "pendejo/mamao" alive if from off the bat, I have to help support a WHOLE family". Like it's not bad enough that, in MANY cases, you have to help support his/her kids.
What SOME of these foreigners do not understand is that YES, to MOST Dominicans, you are expected to help them when you marry into their families. To SOME Dominicans, YES, you are expected to help them when you are courting their kids.
MOST of the people being helped do not know, nor care, of the pressure that they are inflicting. I mean, I know of foreigners and Dominicans living abroad that are living worse than the people that they help. There's a Puerto Rican guy at work, married to a Dominicana, who is ALWAYS borrowing money for lunch but is expected to send 100 dollars a month to her family in Santiago. The stories that he tells me about her family's "wants" are just horrible. Thank God that he told me that he already warned his wife and gave her an ultimatum. He will lose, I am sure.
What some of these foreigners do not know, since they never took the time, or had no time to get to know the person, is that to MOST Dominicans, you are their meal ticket when you marry into their families. It's funny when I hear people say "well, I am as poor as her so she is not with me because of the money", wrong moron, you may be poor but to MOST Dominicans, a foreigner is a "cash factory". SOME do not give a shyt if you are poor as long as you take them home with you. To MOST of them, you represents the ticket out of poverty and the ticket into the land of opportunities. The moment they find out that you have no value to them, they WILL "drop" your axx.
Marry a Dominican, DO NOT "do" their papers and see how far that relationship will last. Of course, unless you go live to the DR and become their "sugar daddy/mommy".
I know only of 1 case where an American girl was told my a buddy of mine in the DR, that is she wanted to date him, to make sure that she knew that he would not leave his country. When she started pressuring him to marry her and that she was going to bring him to the US, he dropped her. Than again, he was born with a "silver spoon" and did not needed her help.
I have seen it ALL. I have seen people in the DR ask their families for just about everything they can think of. From the new "it" cell phone to the new brand-name "things".
One of my favorite lines: "oye, don't forget the money, you know that that's the money we use to eat, if you don't send it, we will go hungry". It's like they know how to make you feel like you HAVE to help them.
But, like I always say: "this is what you get when you date or marry DOWN!.
Btw, nothing wrong with you making them work for what you give/send them!.
I personally know a person, a friend of over 20 years, who married a Dominican living in the US and from the "get-go" she told him that "they" needed to help her parents and sibblings back home. She even told him to think of it as paying another monthly bill. For years, this situation have created so many problems between them that I really do not know how in hell are they still together. He believes in "let then earn it" and she believes in "it's our job to help them".
I mean, if the mother and father are old and can't work, sure, but why support people that are in their 50's and a whole bunch of "vagos" that all they do is wait for their hard-earned dollars every month.
When I come to this site and I see SOME members talking about helping their girlfriend's or spouse's families, I can not help but "shake my head". I mean, I am all for helping people but going into a relationship were it's expected to help someone, in my book, it's insane.
Sometimes I put myself in some of these people's shoes and I come out with the same conclusion: "I must be the biggest "pendejo/mamao" alive if from off the bat, I have to help support a WHOLE family". Like it's not bad enough that, in MANY cases, you have to help support his/her kids.
What SOME of these foreigners do not understand is that YES, to MOST Dominicans, you are expected to help them when you marry into their families. To SOME Dominicans, YES, you are expected to help them when you are courting their kids.
MOST of the people being helped do not know, nor care, of the pressure that they are inflicting. I mean, I know of foreigners and Dominicans living abroad that are living worse than the people that they help. There's a Puerto Rican guy at work, married to a Dominicana, who is ALWAYS borrowing money for lunch but is expected to send 100 dollars a month to her family in Santiago. The stories that he tells me about her family's "wants" are just horrible. Thank God that he told me that he already warned his wife and gave her an ultimatum. He will lose, I am sure.
What some of these foreigners do not know, since they never took the time, or had no time to get to know the person, is that to MOST Dominicans, you are their meal ticket when you marry into their families. It's funny when I hear people say "well, I am as poor as her so she is not with me because of the money", wrong moron, you may be poor but to MOST Dominicans, a foreigner is a "cash factory". SOME do not give a shyt if you are poor as long as you take them home with you. To MOST of them, you represents the ticket out of poverty and the ticket into the land of opportunities. The moment they find out that you have no value to them, they WILL "drop" your axx.
Marry a Dominican, DO NOT "do" their papers and see how far that relationship will last. Of course, unless you go live to the DR and become their "sugar daddy/mommy".
I know only of 1 case where an American girl was told my a buddy of mine in the DR, that is she wanted to date him, to make sure that she knew that he would not leave his country. When she started pressuring him to marry her and that she was going to bring him to the US, he dropped her. Than again, he was born with a "silver spoon" and did not needed her help.
I have seen it ALL. I have seen people in the DR ask their families for just about everything they can think of. From the new "it" cell phone to the new brand-name "things".
One of my favorite lines: "oye, don't forget the money, you know that that's the money we use to eat, if you don't send it, we will go hungry". It's like they know how to make you feel like you HAVE to help them.
But, like I always say: "this is what you get when you date or marry DOWN!.
Btw, nothing wrong with you making them work for what you give/send them!.
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