Why I love this country

Matilda

RIP Lindsay
Sep 13, 2006
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I am having a 7000 volt transformer put on the top of a 35ft concrete post inside my garden so that I can have normal electricity - well as normal as it gets here. At the moment when the pump for the water from the well kicks in, the aircon goes off, and when the pool pump is on the TV goes off etc etc. Also I have around 20 dominican/Haitian families plugged into my line too (illegally) and I assume it is when the Dominican equivalent of Coronation St (famous British soap opera) is on then all my power goes off as they all sit down to watch the nights installment. So, having decided to have my own transformer, yesterday was the day for installation. In the UK you would do it in the day - Dom Rep of course at night. My husband explained it was because there was no sun so it was cooler. (Silly me I thought they needed to see to fix 7000 volts of electric 35ft up a pole). In the Uk you would use a team of well qualified electricians - here, 2 electricians and around 5 motoconcho drivers. In the UK we would use a mechanical machine thing to hoist the transformer (which weighs a ton) up to the top of the pole.....here a piece of string and 5 motoconcho drivers. In the Uk they would drink water and coffee - dangerous playing with 7000volts - here 2 litres of brugal.

End result.....Transformer now on pole - wobbles a bit but what the heck. Midnight - experienced electrician unconscious from Brugal on my patio. Not there this morning though. Electricity went off just after everyone left but seems to be back on now, it's probably as it is windy and its blowing the wires together on top of the pole!!!!

Just thought I'd share this. They are all back tonight to connect up the 7000 volts - so now you know just in case you read in paper of massive explosion in Juan Dolio!!!!!
 

azabache

New member
Apr 25, 2006
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That's one of the reasons I love this country so much. What's routine in First world countries is often an adventure in the DR. I never get bored.
 

dv8

Gold
Sep 27, 2006
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hey, lass!

matilda, get your own blog! ;)
notify the next of kin, you may all perish in the biggest explosion in DR history! :cheeky: :cheeky: :cheeky: :cheeky:
in uk you'd have to sell your kidney to pay for transformer, and then your neighbours would sue over "radiation", channel five will feature you in the next installement of their "house trapped" series, enviroment lovers would protest outside your gate etc... :bunny:
her you get away handing over some brugal and turning a blind eye on a new crop of haitians connecting to your pole...
eeech....
ps uk IS better...;)
 

Ken

Platinum
Jan 1, 2002
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Enjoyed your post. You have the right attitude to make a success of liiving here.
 

dv8

Gold
Sep 27, 2006
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i fully agree with ken.
and if you subscribe to the "heat" magazine and have it delivred here we can be friends forever.
;-)
 

Matilda

RIP Lindsay
Sep 13, 2006
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1. Bit out of touch dv8 but what is heat magazine?
2. if anyone tries to connect now they will get fried. very sad unless it happens to the guy who barbecued my cat last year and then it will be justice.
3. yes Lambada I do have webcam but can only turn it on if there is electric and I assume it will go off when they try and connect my 7000 volts. (By the way you seem like a very nice lady and thanks for all your advice previously)
4. Forgot to mention that in Uk they use proper tools and here they used my kitchen knives and were so drunk have left two on top of the pole - no doubt to stay there till the next hurricane...
5. Must go - Dominican friend just turned up with 20 crabs to cook for tea. No notice at all...does anyone want the hungarian goulash cooking in the oven!!!!!! (What happened to the days of filofax and planning 6 months ahead..."Sorry dahling all my Saturdays are soooo booked up until 2009")
 

dv8

Gold
Sep 27, 2006
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1. :ermm: heat is this celebrity magazine gossip, when you buy at in self-service till at tescos the message "this product is sold to above 18 years olds only"and then 250lb security guy comes to check if it's not porn...
2. bbq your cat?! fry the bugger!
3. try the webcam nonetheless, let us have a laugh too, just before we post a thread about how sorry we are to have seen you go at such young age!
4. once when my boiler in london broke in a middle of a very cold winter and finally, after a week of sleeping in the arctic conditions and consuming 20 sneakers' a day (to deal with caloric loss due to the cold) i had a technitian coming in. he took a huge screwdriver out of his bag and hit the bottom of the boiler which suddenly started with a loud PONG! i could have kicked the thing myself! and save myself 5lb in extra weigh...
5. filo what? we never heard of that here...!
 

Matilda

RIP Lindsay
Sep 13, 2006
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1. and consuming 20 sneakers' a day (to deal with caloric loss due to the cold) 5. filo what? we never heard of that here...!

You ate 20 sneakers a day?????????????As in Nike white things people run in???????????? You didn't by any chance mean Snickers formally known in the UK as Marathon bars do you?
Sorry about the filo thing. Used to be an investment banker till i saw the light and became a poor diving instructor. Lived and breathed my filo thing until it was consigned to the bottom of the indian ocean.
 

dv8

Gold
Sep 27, 2006
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si, snickers bars, i have not seen them for so long i have forgotten all about spelling, shame on me.
investment banking? gee, i don't even know what that is!
filofax i remember seeing in selfridges, never had one.... waitresses usually don't....
 

canadian bob

Bronze
Jan 16, 2002
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When we lived in Barrio de Gregorio Luperon in Puerto Plata, the electric co came to fix our pole transformer in the pitch darkness. I offered them my big 6 cell flashlight.... they gave it back.... got the truck revved up & headlights blazing... rocks under the wheels.... pulled a big piece of broken mirror from behind the seat.... one guy sat in the road infront of the truck & used the mirror to send a huge beam of light to the top of the pole where the other guys worked!
Can anyone top this story? (I bet someone can!) Canadian Bob.
 

Chris

Gold
Oct 21, 2002
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www.caribbetech.com
When we lived in Barrio de Gregorio Luperon in Puerto Plata, the electric co came to fix our pole transformer in the pitch darkness. I offered them my big 6 cell flashlight.... they gave it back.... got the truck revved up & headlights blazing... rocks under the wheels.... pulled a big piece of broken mirror from behind the seat.... one guy sat in the road infront of the truck & used the mirror to send a huge beam of light to the top of the pole where the other guys worked!
Can anyone top this story? (I bet someone can!) Canadian Bob.

What a great story.
 

Hillbilly

Moderator
Jan 1, 2002
18,948
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It worked, didn't it??

Matilda, you I like. Let us know theoutcome of last night''s adventure. I did not feel and rumblings from quakes last night so i suspect either they did not come to finish the job or theydid and nothing bad happened.

RE: the Haitians connected to your line. Get them off of it!! Call EdeESTE and get them to get them off of it. Quite likely, you will be paying for their soap opera viewing!!

Cherrio!!

HB
 

planner

.............. ?
Sep 23, 2002
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I will take you up on the offer for the goulash!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And anything else you care to cook and offer up too!

Love your sense of humour.
 

dv8

Gold
Sep 27, 2006
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matilda, please, talk to us!
have not seen papers yet, was there explosion?
 

shadInToronto

On Vacation....
Nov 16, 2003
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Btw, was the transformer delivered on the back of a motoconcho with 3 other Dominican passangers? .... I bet it was :)
 

dv8

Gold
Sep 27, 2006
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a, motoconchos!
i have seen a guy with a fridge and another one with a washing machine.
our european removal vans are SOOOOOOOOOOOO boring!
 

Lambada

Gold
Mar 4, 2004
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www.ginniebedggood.com
1. Bit out of touch dv8 but what is heat magazine?
I was out of touch, too, so I had to check. Heat Magazine is 'a highly influential UK and South African weekly publication, highlighting all the latest news and gossip from the world of celebrity plumbing and heating installation'............dahling!

If, Matilda, you are currently (no pun intended) lying moaaaning in agony with extremities frito, read this..........
Heat Magazine - Uncyclopedia

Should appeal to your sense of humour. And maybe help when you have to instal a septic tank, hopefully someway distant from the 7000 volts otherwise the excrement will be elevated waaay in excess of the fan.

And thank you for the euphemistic use of the term 'lady'..........;)
 

Matilda

RIP Lindsay
Sep 13, 2006
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Sorry to keep you all on tenterhooks. No electric so no internet. I am so grateful for your concern. Not even fried a little so far, only because they didn't turn up - just as well not enough crabs for everyone. They assure me they are coming tonight. Chief electrician was busy last night - probably with his goat. I have 2 Dominican stepsons - 17 and 15, and the main rule in this house is no sex before they are 18 (and once one is 18 I may increase it to 25), as I don't want to be a grandmother, and the girls round here have a nasty habit of getting pregnant and then finding who they perceive to be rich for a quick bonk and then say it is their kid. Anyway, chief electrician siad I should buy them a lady goat as all Dominican men worth their salt practise on goats first and it will improve their technique and stop them getting too frustrated - the boys not the goats. Do you think this is a good idea???? All advice gratefully received.

matilda
 

dv8

Gold
Sep 27, 2006
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matilda, they will surely fire me for all the laughing and squeeking at my desk and then BEWARE i come to live with you, boys and goats.

my friend who's been imprisoned in jamaica told me that jamaican men do not like to give oral sex to their girls claiming that their p*ssies smell like goat so maybe the goat is a good choice as it's organs resemble those fragrant and delicate female secrets?

you may also advice your boys to masturbate - if they do it with a letf hand, don't wash afterwards and stop going to the church they may even get french passport (as some on this board suggest).

so glad you're alive, even if not for too long.

god bless you for making my day.

:bunny: :bunny: :bunny: