My Doctor

maxschnell

Bronze
Jun 16, 2005
1,252
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Let me tell you about my doctor. He's very good. If you tell him you
want a second opinion, he'll go out and come in again.

He treated one woman for yellow jaundice for three years before he
realized she was Chinese.

Another time he gave a patient six months to live. At the end of the
six months, the patient hadn't paid his bill, so the doctor gave him
another six months.

While he was talking to me, his nurse came in and said, "Doctor,
there is a man here who thinks he's invisible." The doctor said, "Tell him I
can't see him."

Another time, a man came running in the office and yelled "Doctor,
Doctor!! my son just swallowed a roll of film!!" The doctor calmly
replied, "Let's just wait and see what develops.

One patient came in and said, "Doctor, I have a serious memory
problem. The doctor asked, "When did it start?" The man replied, "When did
what start?"

I remember one time I told my doctor I had a ringing in my ears. His
advice: "Don't answer it."

My doctor sure has his share of nut cases. One said to him, "Doctor,
I think I'm a bell." The doctor gave him some pills and said, "Here,
take these if they don't work, give me a ring."

Another guy told the doctor that he thought he was a deck of cards.
The doctor simply said, "Go sit over there. I'll deal with you later."

When I told my doctor I broke my leg in two places, he told me to
stop going to those places.

You know, doctors can be so frustrating. You wait a month and a half
for an appointment, then he says, "I wish you had come to me sooner."
 

vince1956

On Vacation!
May 24, 2006
1,117
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my doctor asked me do i have trouble passing water, i told him i had a dizzy spell going over the severn bridge