I keep thinking about her smile, her laugh, and her presence...it wont leave my head no matter what...and I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT IT...IT HURTS SO BAD.
last night I woke up about 6 times covered in sweat with a racing heart and shaking everywhere and each time I woke up I briefly hallucinated the wad of my blanket to be her body sleeping next to me, holding me. I held the blanket still thinking it was her and that I was still in the hotel room off some beautiful beachfront casa at the Dominican Republic...for those very few seconds of delusion, I was the happiest guy on earth. Then I realized that the blanket wasnt responding to me as I petted it, and there was no silky soft skin like I expected...instead it was a cold, hard, rough wad of blanket...I realized then that I was home alone and suffered a terrible bout of depression to the point where I almost cried. I keep having these VIVID flashes of her, I keep smelling her, I keep feeling her, but I cant BE WITH HER... these mood swings are kicking my ass, I keep telling myself...I HAVE TO GO BACK THERE TO SEE HER...I HAVE TO GO TAKE HER TO SAMANA, and rent out a house in the middle of NOWHERE where we can make continious love 24/7 under the sun and moon...
Like I said in my previous posts...I am in love and there's no stopping me from seeing her. The question is...HOW THE FUCCK am I going to cope with this feeling for 3 weeks until next time I see her?
THATS going to HURT me BAD.
Please dont delete this admit/mod...this is my call for help.
last night I woke up about 6 times covered in sweat with a racing heart and shaking everywhere and each time I woke up I briefly hallucinated the wad of my blanket to be her body sleeping next to me, holding me. I held the blanket still thinking it was her and that I was still in the hotel room off some beautiful beachfront casa at the Dominican Republic...for those very few seconds of delusion, I was the happiest guy on earth. Then I realized that the blanket wasnt responding to me as I petted it, and there was no silky soft skin like I expected...instead it was a cold, hard, rough wad of blanket...I realized then that I was home alone and suffered a terrible bout of depression to the point where I almost cried. I keep having these VIVID flashes of her, I keep smelling her, I keep feeling her, but I cant BE WITH HER... these mood swings are kicking my ass, I keep telling myself...I HAVE TO GO BACK THERE TO SEE HER...I HAVE TO GO TAKE HER TO SAMANA, and rent out a house in the middle of NOWHERE where we can make continious love 24/7 under the sun and moon...
Like I said in my previous posts...I am in love and there's no stopping me from seeing her. The question is...HOW THE FUCCK am I going to cope with this feeling for 3 weeks until next time I see her?
THATS going to HURT me BAD.
Please dont delete this admit/mod...this is my call for help.
