Keeping up (or not) with the Joneses

Funny that you bring this up, as I was just pondering the very same thought this afternoon. I have mixed feelings about the subject. I am sure some of it is, as you say, to do with keeping up with the Jones, at least in some cases, but there are other reasons for the different levels of acceptance.

In many cases, the lower costs of housing in our home countries are in the rougher, more dangerous neighbourhoods of our cities and towns, where it is then not the condition or size of the apartments/houses that are the concern, but the environment surrounding them. Wherever we are, we want to feel safe. And correct me if I am wrong, but I believe you can find these lower priced homes in safer neighbourhoods in the Dominican Republic than you would here in North America.

As for no car...Most of my friends living in a cities here in Canada do not currently own cars. Those living in smaller towns are more likely to own a car, as walking just isn't an option for the distances necessary to travel, and public transportation is only available in the form of 2 or 3 local taxi companies. In the Dominican Republic, if you can't walk there, public transportation is available in many forms... and those many forms are offering very reasonable rates.

Food - In my case, I'll eat what is readily available, what I enjoy, and what I can easily afford in which ever country I am in at the time.

Another thing is that I think we do adjust to our surroundings. Keeping up with the Jones? Not exactly. Our home country is where we started out. We have the bigger homes, the fancier furniture, etc because that is what we are used to. We didn't move up to that level. We were already there. We then move to the Dominican Republic and the people around us don't have these things, these things aren't as readily available, so we adjust. "When in Rome, do as the Romans do."

Those are just some of my thoughts on the subject

CFA123 said:

If people are willing to accept a lower level of comfort in order to live in DR... small apartment, basic furnishings & amenities, less or lower quality food, no car, etc.... why aren't they willing to do the same in their home country?

Do people feel a need to keep up with the Joneses in their home country, but feel more comfortable having less in DR?

Is moving to DR a way that some use to become what would be perceived in their home country as an underachiever without having those they encounter daily think of them in that way?

Discuss. :glasses:

Click to expand...

In my case, no. I have enough resources , and will continue to have enough resouces to live a lifestyle in the DR that may in fact be a larger home, equal food, jeepeta...etc. than I currently have, but will we? Thats not the plan, but only time will tell. I don't keep up with the Jones here, I drive a 1993 Mercedes 400E with 270,000 miles on it, rarely buy new clothing, have a ten year old TV, but have very good shoes, great golf clubs...etc. Every one has different priorities, and mine have been and continue to help my children out with schooling costs as much as I can. I also help my parent out as much as I can because with fixed income and the price of heating a house now is beyond the means of their pensions.

It's not just about the size of the house or the car you drive, it's more about lifestyle.

In my opinion, the lifestyle attainable in the DR is far superior to that of other countries on similar or a lesser budget.

You only begin to understand this when your actually living here

bob saunders said:

but have very good shoes with 270,000 miles left on them have a ten year old TV, .

Click to expand...

Nothing wrong with a ten year old TV all the films are over 10 year;s old:laugh::cheeky:

I think in many instances, some people feel very intimidated in many NA societies because they face competition on so many levels, not just materially but professionally too.

There is a constant pressure to get ahead in both these areas and I think for some, it just catches up with them to a point where they just want "out".

Just my opinion.

I think materially, most of us would get by just fine with a lot less.

This is interesting for me. In my thirty's I had the lifestyle of keeping up with the Joneses. It was important to me then. I grew up poor to lower middle class then did better for myself by working hard. I had the huge house,cars.clothes,etc. with all the trappings. The trappings did not make me happy. I got divorced,traveled to the Dominican Republic for a few years. Material things were not important to me anymore. I then sold everything that I had and moved to the RD. I have since moved back to the US and still live a modest lifestyle. I guess you could say I have come full circle in my life. I came from nothing and needed nothing then and I still need nothing. There is a big difference between need and want. I learned that difference in the RD. What I have learned is that lifestyle is more about living as "I" feel is right for me and to hell with other people's opinions.
As far as keeping up with the Joneses in the DR I guess most people who knew me envied me because I was happy and free. As Robert said the lifestyle was superior reguardless of how little money I spent.

One more thing...I think so many people get caught up in this rat race and cant extricate themselves in NA societies so they look for a form of "escape" from this.

Here is NA, we, I seem to be so caught up with work, that doesn't end when you go home. The do more with less syndrome. Cutbacks in personnel, but not cutbacks in amount of work to be done, in fact more work. Then turn on the news to watch all the horror going, on see which pedophiles they just let out of jail, that may in fact be living in your neighbourhood...etc. Bad air, bad water; it's enough to turn a glass half-full guy like myself into a glass half empty. On the other hand the suicidal drivers in the DR...ETC may be almost as much of a challenge. To wake up in the morning and have fresh fruit and coffee on the balcony, and receive smiles and warm greetings from the neighbours as they pass.

Who says you have to lower your standards when you move to DR. I live in a big 3 bedroom house with a sizable backyard, 3 car garage and have lights 24/7 (inverter), I have 2 a/c, fridge, microwave, home theater with 10 foot projection sreen, 3 PCs, 2 cars and all the free time I desire to do whatever I want. So why do you still believe that people come here to live a much poorer life than they are used to back home? The expats that i know who live in DR, live much better than they probably would at their own home country and have a much more satisfying lifestyle than they ever did in their lives.
AZB

CFA123 said:

If people are willing to accept a lower level of comfort in order to live in DR... small apartment, basic furnishings & amenities, less or lower quality food, no car, etc.... why aren't they willing to do the same in their home country?

Click to expand...

Maybe because it feels more of an 'adventure' to do it abroad? But there is also the 'conspicuous consumption' issue. Apart from our home (which is much roomier & better appointed than the homes we owned in UK) & which we built exactly the way we wanted ( vagaries of Dominican constructors notwithstanding :cheeky & which would have cost us three times the amount to build in UK..........we don't conspicuously splash money about unnecessarily. I would feel very uncomfortable doing that in a land where there is so much poverty. So my jeepeta is safe & functional and.......of 1988 vintage. Then if someone does a wheelie into it I'm not going to be distraught. Mind you I never drove the latest model in UK either because I just don't define standards or lifestyle by material possessions. Never have & never will. I am however content both with how I live, where I live & who I live with. Guess I'm very fortunate.

CFA123 said:

But some just seem to be underachievers and I'm not sure that makes for a good addition to the expat pool.

Click to expand...

Not sure whether they are underachievers or underendowed cerebrally but I have noticed a certain tendency towards the latter. If the UCs have enough financial resources they can manage here but UCs with min resources.............:ermm::ermm:

Wait for the hate mail to roll in now......... but........I call it as I see it.

CFA123 said:

Same here, though mine is of 2000 vintage, but I'm hoping it ages well.

Click to expand...

Like its owner? :cheeky:

CFA123 said:

You're referring to those living/working here as professionals and/or those who lived intelligently and moved with $$$ in their pockets.

It's the recent spate of posts that makes me wonder and ask - 'my niece turned the keys to the bmw over to her parents and is moving to moca with $1000 to her name', 'i have xyz skills, but want to move to pto plata and be a housekeeper', 'i want to buy/build a house in the campos for US$10,000', etc, etc.
If that's 'living much better than at their own home country', well uhm as a friend of mine says 'i sorry for you'.

Seems more to me that we're looking at some underachievers not-so-anonymous.

"Having a more satisfying lifestyle than they ever did in their lives"... I think that's the ticket for many of us - but I fail to see how it applies to some of the recent posters.


ps: note to self - 1) visit AZB's home when visible on webcam at Ahi-Bar. 2) Remove projection tv, spare pc, & used toyota off christmas wish list.

Click to expand...

Ok, you have a point, I didn't read those silly threads of the young innocent people moving to DR.
The last line was funny. I guess I should avoid the webcam in ahibar. Hahaha
AZB

Well.... As its been said again and again, everyone has a different idea, of quality of life, and survival.. About the underacheiver or underendowed cerebrally comment.... Not sure who that was refeered to.. But let me say Personally that it wasnt easy to Work and pay my way through Vanderbilt University with No help from family, governemnt (with the exception of low interest loans), etc... I have been very successufull in life already at less than 30 years old.. But I have had several life changes recently, and my priorities have changed drasticly! I dont think I am either an underacheiver or Dumb, I just want and need less... Less than I used to want or need, and less than most other people (even expats). I have learned through my short time posting on this site,and through other avenues of research that the DR Expat is a different breed of expat! The Dr expat seems to be more affluent, and seems to enjoy being affluent in a poor country! I mean no disrespect or sarcasim.. I just call it as I see it (as others seem to say). Not all of us need a car (vintage or not) Not all of us play golf, or even care if there is an inverter to be honest.. Why not do like someone tolf me "go out in the street when the lights go outl like the other dominicans"

Regardless what you say, or think, living on my budget in the US and living on my budget in the 3rd world (or developing world) are very diffrent. I will be poor to mosyt DR1'ers standrds, YES, I agree... BUT I will not be poor like I would be in the states....

I am sure my desire for quite, and peace and Nothingness will get boreing soon,and I will become productive again..... I am sure of it.. But Noone on this site has any idea what I have been through in the past year, nor will they Never... BUT one shouldnt assume that someone is dumb or lazy just because they want to relax and live beneath themselves for a while.... Open your mind, and realize that you doidnt write the book of rules for life.. That there really isnt any!!
Sorry.. I know alot dont like oposing opinions on DR!, but I had to..

Thanks

TL,

Interesting post. I think you'll find that, as in the rest of the world, DR1 attracts all types.

There are many (I'd say a solid majority, however silent) on here who have a genuine interest in helping you out, as they were (or would have liked to have been) helped when they first arrived.

There are also those who mean well, but have seen posts - and people - similar to yours for years, if not decades, who know where the mines are and try to steer you in the right direction, only to be rebuked. As a result, they provide advice, and if rejected, tend to disappear. Unfortunately, this may have happened in your case, as I've noticed some of the most well experienced and helpful posters haven't responded to your questions lately.

And then there are others who have brought the worst stereotypical behavior attributed to their home countries with them, and come across as arrogant, classist, elitist, sexist, control-obsessed snobs who aren't real big on people who disagree with them.

You've encountered all three types in your short time on the board, just as you'd encounter them in real life. My advice is to take your time, heed the counsel of the first two types, and ignore the third.

Thanks DRob, I am trying to do just that!!! I have gotten used to it on this site... I just thought I would ad my 2 & 1/2 cents in the conversation, because I felt I needed to, but your right, I should ignore...

Thanks

tlbaker78 said:

Thanks DRob, I am trying to do just that!!! I have gotten used to it on this site... I just thought I would ad my 2 & 1/2 cents in the conversation, because I felt I needed to, but your right, I should ignore...

Thanks

Click to expand...

Just like any community, we have all sorts here.

If you don't like reading a particular posters comments, you can add them to your ignore list. It's works great!

Go to your... "User CP".

and under "Miscellaneous" click on the "Buddy / Ignore Lists" link.