The word of the day is Budweiser, as in “she says she’s a woman budweiser Adams Apple so long?”
- Thread starter NanSanPedro
- Start date
Dad Jokes
Breaking News!!!!!!!
Scientists are warning that the earth may run out of conspiracy theories by 2026 if they keep coming true at the current rate!
Scientists are warning that the earth may run out of conspiracy theories by 2026 if they keep coming true at the current rate!
Picture this: A pandemic is unleashed by ticks that live on and around the mouths of alpacas. Global chaos ensues, the disease wipes out 99% of humanity and desperate survivors are forced to live in.........
a post-alpaca lip tick wasteland.
a post-alpaca lip tick wasteland.
Have you heard of Murphy's law?" "Yeah."
"What is it?"
"If something can go wrong, it will go wrong"
"That's right. Have you heard of Cole's law?"
"No, what is it?"
"Thinly sliced cabbage and mayo"
"What is it?"
"If something can go wrong, it will go wrong"
"That's right. Have you heard of Cole's law?"
"No, what is it?"
"Thinly sliced cabbage and mayo"
What happens when you put your hand in a blender?
You get a handshake.
I’m in a band called Dyslexia.
We just released our Greatest Shit album.
Why did Adele cross the road?
To say hello from the other side.
You get a handshake.
I’m in a band called Dyslexia.
We just released our Greatest Shit album.
Why did Adele cross the road?
To say hello from the other side.
That deserves a big Boo for reaching for a joke...............
I’ll tell ya, my wife and I, we don’t think alike. She donates money to the homeless, and I donate money to the topless!
I’m a bad lover. Once I caught a peeping tom booing me.
I’m not a very sexy guy. I went to a hooker. I dropped my pants. She dropped her price.
Like I said above, I’m not a sexy guy. I was once the centerfold for Playgirl magazine but the staples covered everything!
I’m a bad lover. Once I caught a peeping tom booing me.
I’m not a very sexy guy. I went to a hooker. I dropped my pants. She dropped her price.
Like I said above, I’m not a sexy guy. I was once the centerfold for Playgirl magazine but the staples covered everything!
Just before Thanksgiving, a lady went shopping for a turkey for the Harvest Feast. She was rummaging around the frozen bird display looking for a turkey just the *right* size. She’d pick up one, weight it in her hands and put it down, trying more than a few birds. She finally picked up one, and saw a stockboy coming down the aisle. Holding the turkey up, she asked the fella “Do these get any bigger?”.
The stockboy looked at her and replied “No, Lady, their dead”.
The stockboy looked at her and replied “No, Lady, their dead”.
Why did the Dominican take anti-anxiety meds?
For hispanic attacks
2 robbers were robbing a liquor store when one grabbed a bottle and said "is this whisky"?
the other said yea, but but not as whisky as wobbing a bank
What did the carpenter say when he finished building his house?
NAILED IT!!!!
I said to the waitress can I ask you about the menu, please.
She slapped me across the face and said it's none of my business about the men I please.
For hispanic attacks
2 robbers were robbing a liquor store when one grabbed a bottle and said "is this whisky"?
the other said yea, but but not as whisky as wobbing a bank
What did the carpenter say when he finished building his house?
NAILED IT!!!!
I said to the waitress can I ask you about the menu, please.
She slapped me across the face and said it's none of my business about the men I please.
A blonde is doing a jigsaw puzzle when her boyfriend walks in. What are you doing, he asks. "It's a jigsaw puzzle, you idiot"! He then asks what's it supposed to be. So she pulls out the box and tells him "it's a rooster"!
He says to her, "awww babe, let's put the cornflakes back in the package."
He says to her, "awww babe, let's put the cornflakes back in the package."
Did you know?
Soy milk is just milk introducing itself in Spanish.
Soy milk is just milk introducing itself in Spanish.
These silly jokes with the play-on-words are very funny…
Thanks for the laughs 🤣
Dominican word of the day is butternuts.
”She told me she was a woman butternuts told me different.”
”She told me she was a woman butternuts told me different.”