Do you call them on it?

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Eleutheria

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Jun 23, 2015
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Just curious?.
Does anyone on the board ever call Dominicans out on their bull$#it?
I didn't at all, when I arrived. Really trying not to make anyone lose face and all that.
But the past few months I have been totally calling them on it when they have lied or are trying to spin some insane story.
Usually I remind them that they told me something different before, or I will just say seriously "I don't think that's true" or "no puede ser" or "no te creo" or something like that.
They usually react by feebly coming up with some other big lie and they rally surprisingly quickly.
They are a nation of sinverguenzas so I'm pretty sure it has no lasting effect but it makes me feel better.
How do you guys handle it when the Dominicans in your world lie to your face?
And yes, I know that everyone tells the truth in Santiago all the time already, no need to remind me.
:bunny:
 

Eleutheria

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I just don't hang around chopos, easier that way. The rest, just like any day at work.
I don't hang around chopos either. They revolt me. I am talking about regular, every day interactions with Dominicans. It's been my experience that the lying cuts across social classes.
 

bob saunders

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Jan 1, 2002
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There are ways to let people know you don't believe them without embarrassing them in front of others. Nobody likes to be called out in public and with the Dominican love of revenge it probably isn't wise. My wife tells people they must be mistaken or mis-heard something. My mother-in-law nods her head and then tells me after the person leaves that they were lying. I tell people all the time that something isn't believable or is a lie, but then again I'm mainly dealing with kids, and kids love to lie but usually aren't very good at it.
 
Apr 7, 2014
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Just curious?.
Does anyone on the board ever call Dominicans out on their bull$#it?
I didn't at all, when I arrived. Really trying not to make anyone lose face and all that.
But the past few months I have been totally calling them on it when they have lied or are trying to spin some insane story.
Usually I remind them that they told me something different before, or I will just say seriously "I don't think that's true" or "no puede ser" or "no te creo" or something like that.
They usually react by feebly coming up with some other big lie and they rally surprisingly quickly.
They are a nation of sinverguenzas so I'm pretty sure it has no lasting effect but it makes me feel better.
How do you guys handle it when the Dominicans in your world lie to your face?
And yes, I know that everyone tells the truth in Santiago all the time already, no need to remind me.
:bunny:
Oh yea oh yea, in Santiago all the people are built.like Pinochios so honesty is the rule of law or a tremendous nose cancer overtakes them and they die young. Hahaha.

Actually what you said is what I do but I tend to use "mierda" interspersed between my words.

I do it intentionally so they lose face because they think I am stupid enough to WANT to listen to weak lies.

His Royal Majesty, Lord Belly Button Kidney Bean, House of Donkey Kong
 
Sep 4, 2012
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Process of elimination and selective targeting. I renege to deal with liars, he one that have tried are not longer allowed to and out of my circle.
 

Eleutheria

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I could not post a thousand, see above why.
I would like to clarify something. I am considered a "very direct" person by my own culture's standards. I have my flaws, but I have a meticulous adherence to the truth. That is how I was raised. I despise liars, and I am not a liar. If I choose to do something, I should be comfortable enough to not have to lie about it. I don't want to bother remembering what tales I have spun to which person and I think honesty is always the best policy.
I would never allow a liar to be in my circle, and in my life. I am talking about, for instance, my security camera guy who I need to see over several occasions. Or a doctor. Or the lawyer who drew up my rental contract. Not chopos. Not friends. But people who I can't avoid dealing with, people who I am in the middle of transactions with, sometimes people that I can't replace because I don't know anyone else who can do whatever it is needs to be done.
Do these people lie to my face? Yes, constantly.
I feel like you are implying that I am making bad choices about who I spend my time with and that is simply not the case.
 

Garyexpat

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Sep 7, 2012
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Just curious….
Does anyone on the board ever call Dominicans out on their bull$#it?
I didn't at all, when I arrived. Really trying not to make anyone lose face and all that.
But the past few months I have been totally calling them on it when they have lied or are trying to spin some insane story.
Usually I remind them that they told me something different before, or I will just say seriously "I don't think that's true" or "no puede ser" or "no te creo" or something like that.
They usually react by feebly coming up with some other big lie and they rally surprisingly quickly.
They are a nation of sinverguenzas so I'm pretty sure it has no lasting effect but it makes me feel better.
How do you guys handle it when the Dominicans in your world lie to your face?
And yes, I know that everyone tells the truth in Santiago all the time already, no need to remind me.
:bunny:
ALL THE TIME! After 9+ years of living here, the little patience I arrived with is gone. Since I do business with Dominicans I make it a point to, whenever possible, to have things in writing. I am not talking about contracts necessarily but even normal conversations about commission paid, how much, when etc. This way when they have their memory lapses WHCH THEY WILL, I just forward the email and highlight where they acknowledged what they are now disputing.
 
Sep 4, 2012
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I would like to clarify something. I am considered a "very direct" person by my own culture's standards. I have my flaws, but I have a meticulous adherence to the truth. That is how I was raised. I despise liars, and I am not a liar. If I choose to do something, I should be comfortable enough to not have to lie about it. I don't want to bother remembering what tales I have spun to which person and I think honesty is always the best policy.
I would never allow a liar to be in my circle, and in my life. I am talking about, for instance, my security camera guy who I need to see over several occasions. Or a doctor. Or the lawyer who drew up my rental contract. Not chopos. Not friends. But people who I can't avoid dealing with, people who I am in the middle of transactions with, sometimes people that I can't replace because I don't know anyone else who can do whatever it is needs to be done.
Do these people lie to my face? Yes, constantly.
I feel like you are implying that I am making bad choices about who I spend my time with and that is simply not the case.
I wasn't and as you am very straight forward, because of that, I have no qualms to tell it the way it is. My approach has worked, don't know why yours wouldn't?
 

malko

Campesino !! :)
Jan 12, 2013
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Depends on the situation.

- if its a small thing, everyday life, give them a ta bien, no t' apure (?) and leave it at that.

- if its gvt officials,,or banks or whatever, i now play them back the phone conversation, or actual conversation. Which exposes you to the " thats not me speaking " excuse :)

To bounce off the dominicans " revenge mentality " . My obsevations have noted quite the opposite. I have witnessed people being spoken/treated like shi.t and a day after they speak to each other again. Whereas back home, grudges would be in order.
 

CristoRey

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Apr 1, 2014
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You mean to tell me they been lying the whole time? Well I'll be damned, that sure explains a lot.

I've had my Dominican friends lie to me about everything from what time of day it is, to killing people.
Seems to be a package deal. I think its normal.
 

drSix

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Oct 13, 2013
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I did, but no longer.

It's like trying to get my 3 year old to come clean about the spilled juice. They will weave the tanglest of webs before every coming clean. Even when caught red handed. No es mi culpa, is a national creed.

The problem is, they think we are all stupid, gullible, and trusting. Most of us Gringos aren't here long enough to be wise to the scams, manipulation, and lies. So, they're right, for the majority of Gringos.
 

HUG

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Feb 3, 2009
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I think after a while dealing with BS becomes part and parcel of just going about your daily exchanges. You don't need people to be in your circle to hear the BS, you can be offered it while just going about your every day life, in stores, telephone providers, the neighbours, extended family etc. lying in DR is equally accepted as the truth. I consider myself a pretty good judge of people, and never have I come across a people who can look your square in the eye and lie as if you could elsewhere be sure it was gospel. They seem immune to the usual clics and signs of lying most of us might show (no eye contact, looking at the floor, change of subject, lots of stuttering etc etc etc).
But without doubt the most infuriating trait of a Dominican with regards to BS is that they will never ever accept responsibility, for anything, ever. Never apologize, even when they have been caught out red handed. The ability to hold their head high when they have been shown to be lying is unreal, inconceivable, and no doubt is all down to the core issue that they have NO SHAME. And that is just in the blood, absolutely shameless.
And yes, I call them out all the time, I have no issue with calling someone out no matter where they are. The more public or embarrassing the better. In that I would expect they would learn not to do it again because of this, but actually it doesn't work. Why? Well, it is impossible to embarrass someone with no shame.
And so, there you are. Accepting BS, learning to just treat everything that anyone says as BS is the best way to make your life easier. Don't rely on anyone or trust anyone because it is a 50/50 chance that anything could be utter bu11**** and a waste of your time. I think this is why those that live most successfully in DR have a well defined line between them, others and whoever else they to some extent allow into their space.
 

SantiagoDR

"46"
Jan 12, 2006
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Eleutheria,

Ask a Dominican a simple "Yes" / "No" question.

Most likely the answer involves many sentences, and probably not one of them answers the question. Rarely will a Dominican answer "the question" the first time around, you will have to ask the question again and probably again.

I think they feel they must come up with an answer regardless if they know the answer to a question.

"I don't know" is not allowed in the Dominican vocabulary.

As I was getting ready to go in town, I asked my wife if she was going in town with me.

As she began her speech, I stopped her and said: It's a yes or no question!
 
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