Few questions on DR Dating Scene & 3 Date Rule.

[melphis]

@jd426 @CristoRey Haha but is this really the case for nearly everyone in the country? Say you're a regular 19, 20, 21 year old with a regular job, regular looks etc... if you ask out the 19 year old hottie and she says yes, you mean you're almost guaranteed to bang her at the end of first date? or does this only apply if you are American/have some kind of money/some type of status/etc?

It mostly depends on how many $100.00 bills you have stapled to your forehead. If you are an average looking 20 year old why are you looking for dating advice on a public forum where the average age is older than your parents.
Maybe ask dad "I'm going to a foreign country, can't speak the language but I want to get laid. How did that work out with you and mom".

My cartoon world just keeps getting funner and funner

 

[JD Jones]

You didnt give your age.

I have found that anybody above 25-30 that is not married/in-a-couple has no chance of finding a partner. Will sex be available ? yes.
But dominicanas will think you have some sort of problem or issue if you are single.
Case in point, to get married in the DR, you need a document to prove you are not married.
All well and good if you are divorced, as that document will do. But near impossible when--- like me--you had never been married.
I had to get a notary paper, with witnesses, and swear on my honour that i wasnt married.....like wtf ?

Once you are in couple, or married, it seems women are very, very available, much more so than in europe ( and I am guessing the US ).
Infidelity is seen very differently than back home. Its kind of an accepted way of life ( yes, yes there are exceptions ..... i know i am married 🤣🤣🤣🤣).

100% agree.

 

[chico bill]

Why do we bother to respond to inane and ridiculous questions from a member that joined when ...last Saturday.
Reminds me of what Red Foxx said when people were discussing vintage wines in his house.
They asked him what vintage he drank and he replied: "Ripple, ....Wendsday"

 

[johne]

Why do we bother to respond to inane and ridiculous questions from a member that joined when ...last Saturday.
Reminds me of what Red Foxx said when people were discussing vintage wines in his house.
They asked him what vintage he drank and he replied: "Ripple, ....Wendsday"

Agree. The reason my be "oh, it's the week between Christmas and New Year things are slow". I'v heard this all my life. Here on DR1 we're low on content. Other than Haiti and traffic accidents, Luis seems to be solving all the problems.

 

[Drperson]

Well from a woman's point of view, you have to go pretty high up the social ladder to find a Dominican guy who expects to wait until the third date. Hell most Dominican guys think that if you dance with them a second time then that definitely means that you are going home with them, even if you've just met them. Sex is far more freely available in DR, not seen as such a big thing.

It's important to recognise that as a foreigner, a part of your attraction will be your money and your passport. I think it's fair to say that most Dominicans (at least most that I know) think that dating a foreigner is a far better idea than dating a Dominican. And my strategy is always to try and let things calm down, get them to realise that you're a person too, you have your faults, dreams, needs, habits. Not just a bank account and a passport. I find I have to be pretty insistent that sex isn't going to happen until I'm ready, I get a lot of "Dios tu 'ta complicada" comments but it's worth it.

There are plenty of women on here by the way, I'd say about half. It's easy to spot us, we are the ones making the calm and sensible posts.

You were well on the way to a sensible post until the last part.

it was funny

 

[Drperson]

I think this https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Brief_Wondrous_Life_of_Oscar_Wao book is required reading for anyone living or dating here. Great book. YOu will learn alot

 

[melphis]

Why do we bother to respond to inane and ridiculous questions from a member that joined when ...last Saturday.
Reminds me of what Red Foxx said when people were discussing vintage wines in his house.
They asked him what vintage he drank and he replied: "Ripple, ....Wendsday"

Because it's fun!!

 

[CristoRey]

@jd426 @CristoRey Haha but is this really the case for nearly everyone in the country? Say you're a regular 19, 20, 21 year old with a regular job, regular looks etc... if you ask out the 19 year old hottie and she says yes, you mean you're almost guaranteed to bang her at the end of first date? or does this only apply if you are American/have some kind of money/some type of status/etc?

I was never anything close to a "regular" 19,20,21 year old with a regular job, regular looks ect. (which would have been over 25 years ago) so I've no idea. I don't socialize with women under 30. A lot of foreigners come down here thinking they are smarter than these young women and end up finding themselves in rather unfortunate situations. When in Rome...

 

[melphis]

I know several men ( 30 to 60) that came here looking for love. As if any decent, reasonable looking young Dominican woman wants some fat ass white guy banging her. They do it for money and or hoping for a better life. The ones that think they are clever seem to get pregnant hoping for a lifelong check. All they do is ruin not only their life but the kids life too.

It's sad but play stupid games, win stupid prizes

 

[jd426]

I know several men ( 30 to 60) that came here looking for love. As if any decent, reasonable looking young Dominican woman wants some fat ass white guy banging her. They do it for money and or hoping for a better life. The ones that think they are clever seem to get pregnant hoping for a lifelong check. All they do is ruin not only their life but the kids life too.

It's sad but play stupid games, win stupid prizes

What do you mean by " the ones who think they are clever " ?
If the Father is for example from New Jersey, she most definitely gets a check for the next 18 Years . not sure about how other states run it .

 

[melphis]

What do you mean by " the ones who think they are clever " ?
If the Father is for example from New Jersey, she most definitely gets a check for the next 18 Years . not sure about how other states run it .

How can any US state or any other foreign country try to collect child maintenance payments from a woman that claims pregnancy in another country. There is no way a foreign woman can proof that a US guy knocked her up and split. No evidence of paternity and really no legal way to get one.

It makes no sense.

As I said they think they are clever. I never said they where clever. IMHO any woman of any race that would sleep with some guy thinking it could work out to a 18 year paycheck is dumber than a sack of rocks.

 

[cavok]

How can any US state or any other foreign country try to collect child maintenance payments from a woman that claims pregnancy in another country. There is no way a foreign woman can proof that a US guy knocked her up and split. No evidence of paternity and really no legal way to get one.

It makes no sense.

As I said they think they are clever. I never said they where clever. IMHO any woman of any race that would sleep with some guy thinking it could work out to a 18 year paycheck is dumber than a sack of rocks.

I don't know about states paying maintenance, but if the woman is married to the man and he's at least 62, Social Security will pay for a child dependent up to age 18. All you need to do is get an approved paternity test in Santo Domingo.

 

[melphis]

I don't know about states paying maintenance, but if the woman is married to the man and he's at least 62, Social Security will pay for a child dependent up to age 18. All you need to do is get an approved paternity test in Santo Domingo.

I did not know that. Does the US recognize American men marrying DR or Haitian women outside the US?
I'm thinking the marriage would have to be done in the US to get rid of fraudulent claims.

 

[cavok]

I did not know that. Does the US recognize American men marrying DR or Haitian women outside the US?
I'm thinking the marriage would have to be done in the US to get rid of fraudulent claims.

Yes. The marriage has to be legal, official, and verified. Can't remember all the steps involved, but a friend of mine did it for both of his kids with a Dominican wife here. I think he first had to apply for US citizenship for the kids.

 

[AlterEgo]

What do you mean by " the ones who think they are clever " ?
If the Father is for example from New Jersey, she most definitely gets a check for the next 18 Years . not sure about how other states run it .

You’re absolutely correct. I know a couple of guys in NJ paying child support to children in DR. A close family member is a NJ Probation Officer, and they used to work in Child Support division.

 

[Tom0910]

I don't know about states paying maintenance, but if the woman is married to the man and he's at least 62, Social Security will pay for a child dependent up to age 18. All you need to do is get an approved paternity test in Santo Domingo.

You don't have to be married. And the DNA test is not required,it is up to the discretion of the interviewing agent at the embassy when you apply for the child's passport and SS card. I have been through the process FYI.

 

[RDKNIGHT]

I know several men ( 30 to 60) that came here looking for love. As if any decent, reasonable looking young Dominican woman wants some fat ass white guy banging her. They do it for money and or hoping for a better life. The ones that think they are clever seem to get pregnant hoping for a lifelong check. All they do is ruin not only their life but the kids life too.

It's sad but play stupid games, win stupid prizes

well said.....

 

[playacaribe2]

You don't have to be married. And the DNA test is not required,it is up to the discretion of the interviewing agent at the embassy when you apply for the child's passport and SS card. I have been through the process FYI.

Correct.

Further those benefits are only available to a minor child if you are eligible (62 and over) AND currently collecting social security benefits. That amount is usually 50% of the collecting spouses benefit.

Adding also, if the parties are married and the collecting spouse passes, the surviving spouse will also receive ss benefits, no matter their age, as long as the child or children of a US parent are under age 16 and have the requisite paperwork including an ss#.

Otherwise ss benefits for minor children can accrue until age 18.

Noting that different rules apply if there is a disability involved.

Lots of nuances that would take several pages to flesh out.

Many Dominicans are aware of the rules/benefits that accrue by being married to and having children with older American men.


Respectfully,
Playacaribe2

 

[Administration]

As I recall I had to be listed on my daughter's Dominican birth certificate, and the powers that be won't list the father without a marriage certificate. Since we were married in California, the marriage certificate had to be notarized and apostilled and officially translated and legalized in DR. So, with daughter's Dominican birth certificate could establish paternity. The rules for recording a live birth of a US Citizen abroad are paternity and residency. The US parent must have lived so many years in the US after the age of 14, or some kind of rule. The form lists all the documents that they accept as proof, however when I declared that my daughter is a US citizen some dude (in the DR) pushed a button and popped out a government record of me going back to the 1980's and used that to 'prove' that I satisfied residency requirements (which is IMHO kinda crazy that someone in the DR can do such a thing, but whatevers I guess). The guy didn't care about any of the 'residency proof' documents I brought with me.

When i submitted the declaration, I had to swear that I would be financially responsible for my daughter until she is a legal adult. So that's the answer to the question about child support. Why would a parent not want to support their child, anyway.

The legwork and documentation was much more intense in the DR, because they do things differently. For example, have to make 3 trips downtown for a simple documentation thing, and they want to keep your original notarized and apostilled documents which, in my opinion, makes it easier for crooks to steal identities. In the US they want to see original documents, and maybe make photocopies, but they don't keep original documents. IF you show up at a government office with a photocopy of a birth certificate, they aren't going to accept it, right? Even the school here wants an original notarized birth certificate for my daughter. What security measured do they have on those documents? Probably employee identity theft waiting to happen. Anyhow...

About the OP, the "three date rule" has been OK with me, but women who don't put out on the first or second date are probably not going to get along with my shenanigans anyways. So, I don't usually bother with third dates if nothing's happening. I'm just saving the woman the trouble of thinking they might want to like me.

 

[jd426]

Also keep in mind ( check with your Lawyer) , when you do pass away , IF you have no other Children and lets say you did NOT complete you Will.. ALL of your Assets will go to your Sole Heir ..if you are married to the mother or not , Does not matter ..
I knew exactly such a person in NY City who had a daughter with a Woman from outside the US , and he literally had a one night thing with her many years ago , he had very little contact with his daughter , although he did pay her College . He had Zero relationship with the mother , just some mail and phone contact .. the Daughter visited maybe 3 times in her life total . She is in her 20's ? Our Friends Mother warned him " one day she will come knocking at your door"
This Man had a Girlfriend in NY for many years ..but unfortunately NO Will could be found, when he died suddenly .
Guess who got ALL his assets .. the daughter .. and it was a good size chunk of Money, 2 F&C houses , Expensive Cars , his retirement Money . 7 figures .
We had a front Row seat to all of it . The Woman who was his GF and who did everything for him for many decades, was absolutely furious .
She did not get a Dime as they were never married .


So keep that in the back of your mind when you are fooling around ... Play stupid games win stupid prizes...