- Thread starter SKing
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I need personal OPINIONS, without personal ATTACKS
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PLUS you will be of more use to US here when you know more and come back down in a few years
Seems to me a no brainer. You've got a great career opportunity and the chance to educate your children in the U.S.
kids have no concept ot "time", so, tell them they are going back, just not yet, in a little while, etc. not next week but after a while, before you know it a few years have passed, the kids have new friends and don't want to go back. i know it's tough when 3 or 4 mouths are nagging you, change the subject. take comfort that at work life may be calmer than at home, enjoy the work, you got selected for a reason. sometimes i'd much rather be at work than at home with the wife complaining about how much she doesn't have, a lot more peaceful and i know what to expect from the guys.........
You are young and your kids are young. You are still building a financial base for yourself and your loved ones. If it is the father of the child who you need to be with but as you have said thousands of times that you won't bring him over to the USA, well I believe passing by such an opportunity (Chapel Hill job, kids education) just to go to Santiago to be with him is worst than bringing him over. I say if cannot live without him is to bring him over, worst case scenario is he flees to NY and you yank him by putting him in Child Support, so he has to work "obligao".
Do you think I love it here in Vegas? I would be in Playa Caribe by now drinking whisky until it runs out, but I have to think on my and my loved ones future. DR's is not a country to be short of money, or without a steady income. Maybe plan your yearly vacations well and head over the DR to have the time of your life every year. Besides that job will look tight in your resume. If I were you I would stay.
Do you think I love it here in Vegas? I would be in Playa Caribe by now drinking whisky until it runs out, but I have to think on my and my loved ones future. DR's is not a country to be short of money, or without a steady income. Maybe plan your yearly vacations well and head over the DR to have the time of your life every year. Besides that job will look tight in your resume. If I were you I would stay.
This is true too, here in USA children's opinions has a lot of pull in grown up decisions. When I was a child I was told this: "los muchachos hablan cuando las gallinas mean".
Berzin, very well put, Thank you.
Let me put to rest the assumptions that I make all of my decisions based on men. If that was the case, I would not even consider the job because "mi novio" is in Santiago. BTW, he is no tiguere, he has his own job and is entering his last year in the University for Engineering. There are many homes in Sajoma and Jarabacoa that were blueprinted by him and built by him and his father.
None of my children were mistakes and I do all that I do for them. I have never been on welfare or depended on my family to support my kids, I could easily drop them off with my "momma" and run off to Santiago to live a single life but I have never been separated from them since age 18. Like I stated before, as a nurse I have worked 50 and 60 hour work weeks, fitting in a day here or there to spend with my kids whereas when we lived in Santiago I spent much more time with them. I learned WHO my kids were, learned more about their personalities, and spent more time with them than I did in the States, then and now. Yes, I rushed back to the States but I had several reasons for that, not just to give birth because at the time I was only 2 months pregnant, I had plenty of time.
I have said too much already as I told myself that I was not going to explain myself to people who do not know me personally and try to guess my biography by what I post on this forum.
Continue with the advice, please no more about mi novio because my decisions have never been based on him, then or now. They are based on my children and I, and how we feel.
SHALENA
P.S.
I have been a Nurse for 10 years and know how babies are made. If I have 10 more it will be my perogative because it's me who supports them.
Thank You
Let me put to rest the assumptions that I make all of my decisions based on men. If that was the case, I would not even consider the job because "mi novio" is in Santiago. BTW, he is no tiguere, he has his own job and is entering his last year in the University for Engineering. There are many homes in Sajoma and Jarabacoa that were blueprinted by him and built by him and his father.
None of my children were mistakes and I do all that I do for them. I have never been on welfare or depended on my family to support my kids, I could easily drop them off with my "momma" and run off to Santiago to live a single life but I have never been separated from them since age 18. Like I stated before, as a nurse I have worked 50 and 60 hour work weeks, fitting in a day here or there to spend with my kids whereas when we lived in Santiago I spent much more time with them. I learned WHO my kids were, learned more about their personalities, and spent more time with them than I did in the States, then and now. Yes, I rushed back to the States but I had several reasons for that, not just to give birth because at the time I was only 2 months pregnant, I had plenty of time.
I have said too much already as I told myself that I was not going to explain myself to people who do not know me personally and try to guess my biography by what I post on this forum.
Continue with the advice, please no more about mi novio because my decisions have never been based on him, then or now. They are based on my children and I, and how we feel.
SHALENA
P.S.
I have been a Nurse for 10 years and know how babies are made. If I have 10 more it will be my perogative because it's me who supports them.
Thank You
I Thought alot about my kids education, this time I would put them in Santiago Christian School. Thus school can match any school in the States and over 90% ( or is it 95%) graduate and go on to University in the States. Google it and check it out for yourself.
SHALENA
SHALENA
When I was raised we did what we were told, when we were told and all it took was "a look" to put us in check. Our desires were NEVER considered when the parental unit was making wise choices for the good of the family.
Stop with the emotion and use good judgement...it sounds like you're a signle mom with a newborn...be a responsible adult and make the right choices for your family.
You can either raise future doctors and nurses in the U.S. or moto-concho drivers, shoe shiners and windshield washers in Santiago...tell the kids they can return to the DR on their own--when they GRADUATE.
Stop with the emotion and use good judgement...it sounds like you're a signle mom with a newborn...be a responsible adult and make the right choices for your family.
You can either raise future doctors and nurses in the U.S. or moto-concho drivers, shoe shiners and windshield washers in Santiago...tell the kids they can return to the DR on their own--when they GRADUATE.
"History Lesson"
Santiago is not going to get cheaper to live in, in the future.
Job opportunities in the D.R. are not going to be great for your kids in the future.
Santiago right now is a playground for them, it is not a good life choice for them in the future.
And as others have pointed out, once they get older, the PLAYGROUND will go away
..... and so will they, IF and WHEN they find jobs or some Tigre(?) to move in with.
Unless you have an extreme personal reason to give up a promising career, stay in the STATES!
Your kids future is not the playground they now find so appealing.
You and your kids will not be happy living on half the income you had before.
SantiagoDR
Santiago is not going to get cheaper to live in, in the future.
Job opportunities in the D.R. are not going to be great for your kids in the future.
Santiago right now is a playground for them, it is not a good life choice for them in the future.
And as others have pointed out, once they get older, the PLAYGROUND will go away
..... and so will they, IF and WHEN they find jobs or some Tigre(?) to move in with.
Unless you have an extreme personal reason to give up a promising career, stay in the STATES!
Your kids future is not the playground they now find so appealing.
You and your kids will not be happy living on half the income you had before.
SantiagoDR
Yes but it is expensive, if you will be working part time it will be hard to pay for three kids in this school.
I used to play with the baby spraying water with the hose in the marquesina too.
The baby love it.
JJ
Shalena can you accept the position and go back and forth as you did in the past?
I think you should wait for a few months to make the decision, you just had a baby and your hormones are all over the place.
How long do you get in the US for maternity leave?
I think you should wait for a few months to make the decision, you just had a baby and your hormones are all over the place.
How long do you get in the US for maternity leave?Shalena can you accept the position and go back and forth as you did in the past?
I think you should wait for a few months to make the decision, you just had a baby and your hormones are all over the place.
I wish but that is not possible. My schedule will be 7am-5:30pm four days per week plus after 1 year, I will have to take call. Plus, to stay on the roll for the job that I have now, I will need to work 3 days for them every 6 weeks as a casual nurse.
I was a travel nurse when I lived in Santiago, it is MUCH different than being on staff.
Also, they give you one week to decide because so many nurses applied, the residency starts Aug 9th
SHALENA
an additional child now and to raise all of them with half you had as a income before? don't think much about their beloved playground, think about a good career for yourself for which you have the opportunity now so you are able to maintain the best education for all of them so in the future they will be in the best position to travel themselves and decide themselves where to live and work etc.
in the US YOU will get the best to advance in your own profession, good for all in the future.
in the US THEY will get the best education and you make the bucks to pay for THEM.
if after a few years, financially and professionally ready yourself and educationwise your kids prepared for it, you all together can decide to move to Santiago or somewhere else or to maybe just stay in NC.
but such is of course your decision, and it should be yours, you are the adult in the family, you know yourself and your kids best.
without knowing you and your kids and your way of living very well in person it is impossible to give advice on such important decision.
from my outsider point of view i would say stay and advance and find out what the future brings up in NC for all of you.
good luck anywhere
Mike
in the US YOU will get the best to advance in your own profession, good for all in the future.
in the US THEY will get the best education and you make the bucks to pay for THEM.
if after a few years, financially and professionally ready yourself and educationwise your kids prepared for it, you all together can decide to move to Santiago or somewhere else or to maybe just stay in NC.
but such is of course your decision, and it should be yours, you are the adult in the family, you know yourself and your kids best.
without knowing you and your kids and your way of living very well in person it is impossible to give advice on such important decision.
from my outsider point of view i would say stay and advance and find out what the future brings up in NC for all of you.
good luck anywhere
Mike
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