Real curiosity about the use of diapers

[trina]

Since he was the first "Rubio" in the family he was made the "PRINCE"!He was passed from relative to relative and then to the neighbors.Since then we have had two more,also spoiled rotten!
I HATE pacifiers!!! Luckily,only the "middle" girl ever used them.She will be 4 in May,and still does! I just try and let Dominicans be Dominicans!! I am heavily outnumbered here!!!Financially I will be much wealthier once we are done with Pampers and "Powdered Milk"!We are talking thousands of pesos per month!!
I have given in to the Dominican culture of having the kids in bed,and/or in the bedroom with the parents!We have a huge bedroom,with a "Kingsize" bed,a "Twin Bed",and two cribs!!The two little girls and our 8 year old son can be found using any or all of the above on any given night!Being "60" on my next birthday,means these kids are kind of like my children and grandchildren at the same time!It also means that I get up about 10 times during the night to "PI$$",so I take lots of time and pleasure in watching the kids sleeping,hugging them, smelling their hair,and thanking God for blessing me so!
My "Advise",raise your kids like your dominican family wants to raise them.On top of that,teach them to say,"Please & Thankyou"!Read to them,play games with them."Talk" to them,and don't forget to "listen" to them too.Dominicans don't spend what Americans call "Quality Time" with their kids!Kids here spend a lot more time with their sisters and brothers,and "Cousins".Probably because there are "LOTS" of both,and they usually live nearby,if not in the same house.I try to take turns giving eavch of our kids some "face Time" with just the two of us daily.Theyn really like feeling "Special"
I think that there are lots of advantages to a "Blended",or "Bi-Cultural" family.So let the kids "Get Something" from both their parents cultures,even if it means defering to the DR side more than the other way around!!
CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC

Although I am trying to keep the Dominican culture alive with my boys, there are definitely parts of the culture worth avoiding, such as excessive use of the bottle and "bobo". Neither Dominic nor Noah have ever had a pacifier in their mouth - they both spat it out in disgust whenever it was popped in there - they much prefer the breast. So I was their pacifier. Not complaining though, breastfeeding is the best diet in the whole world! Neither boy would ever take a bottle, either. Noah still doesn't know how to drink from one. He has been drinking from a sippy cup or glass - yes glass! or water bottle - since he was six months old. He's now 11 months, and drinks perfectly from a cup. And I got the "abusadora" from many Dominicans, too, because I refused to give a bottle. I smiled and explained, well, you see, that's why they have such good teeth! Many also asked me why I don't feed my children formula instead of breastmilk. I guess since all gringas are "rich", why would I act like a "poor" person and breastfeed ...argh...sometimes the mentality of people is shocking...

Criss...fwiw, Dominic (4) and Noah (1) both sleep in our king-sized bed, too. Angel can't sleep without them!

 

[yasmin]

rick Snyder:
In regards to your 2 year old daughter did she automatically one day start informing you that she had to use the bathroom or is this something that you taught her to do?

My youngest is 20 months old, we started a few months ago to tell her "pipi or caca" at every diaper change. Now, she already knows it by herself, and comes tell us when she did something and needs a change. When she will be two years old we start with the toilet training, but then she will already prepared for the "pipi and caca feeling".

About the breastfeeding, it is true that people refer breastmilk for the poor, which is very sad. It's much better for the baby and a lot safer because of the high temperatures in the DR the milk in a bottle can turn sour very easy if they don't drink it at one time!!

About the plastic pants, I'm not really sure if they are used a lot, but I've already seen them in the stores and supermarkets.

 

[trina]

Isn't this adorable, guys talking about their babies and pampers and toilet training and sippy cups.

Maybe this is the start of things to come in.

AZB you better go get a wife and get her pregnant so you can keep up here :laugh:

I was just thinking how nice it was not to have Tony C around jumping in and spoiling things when we talk about babies and families :classic: .

 

[dcareamama]

I think many things in the DR have changed a great deal. When I was growing up there, it was very common for parents to potty train their kids quite early on. You began to train the child by anticipating when the child needed to go to the potty. Once there, the mother would make a "pipi" sound or a "pssssssss" sound to prompt the child to urinate. I had seen this done with children as young as one. The "pssssss" sound is a universal way of potty training children throughout the world and it is now in "vogue" in the US. Here in the States, they have even given it a hip name - it's called Elimination Communication and CNN did a segment on it a few months ago. See link below and click "in the news" and see for yourself.

http://www.diaperfreebaby.org/

Some of you have written about potty training girls. From what I have heard in my moms groups is that girls potty train earlier and easier than boys. I don't think this is based on any empirical data, but that is the general thought around here. I also hear girls walk earlier. I don't know. We have been potty training our almost three year old son on and off for a couple of months now. I don't think he is quite ready yet and most mothers tell me three is on the young side for a boy.

I also would like to point out that the custom of sleeping with your babies or at least sharing the same bedroom with your children is pretty commom around the world. It is commonplace in Japan, for example, to have babies sleep on a futon next to the parents. Again, cultures around the world have been doing this for ages, but the American Academy of Pediatrics is adamantly oppose to the practice of bedsharing or co-sleeping. Proponents of the practice have also given this customa hip name - it's called the family bed and many books have now been written about it. Gotta love the USA! Pediatricians like Jay Gordon and William Sears even have websites with information about how to co-sleep with your children and create a safe "family bed". My husband and I sleep with our three year old and 7 month old. My three year old never wanted anything to do with his crib and we just caved in. You would think we would have learned our lesson with our second child, but nooooooooooo. Anyway, we do it because it is what comes natural to us, and not because I am Dominican. Actually, I don't even tell my Dominican friends here in the States that we sleep with our children as they would be mortified and thus it is our little dirty secret (LOL).

I also didn't know I had been practicing what is now called "Attachment Parenting" since the birth of our first son, go figure.

http://www.attachmentparenting.org/
http://www.drjaygordon.com/development/ap/flower.asp
http://www.askdrsears.com/

Keith R, the last time I saw you, I think I mentioned that we use cloth diapers on our two sons here in the States. I also may have mentioned how I searched for cloth diapers in the DR and could not find any. Actually, they exist, but they are used now as pretty embroidered burp cloths. That is another thing that has changed in the DR. No one seems to use cloth diapers anymore, not even the poor. I was cloth diapered and I remember even my cousins being cloth diapered in the late seventies and early eighties in the DR. There is a lot of research out there about the benefits of using cloth diapers, not only for the environment but also for the babies. Basically, less toxic junk against the baby's skin by using cloth. That is the main reason I chose to cloth diaper my sons. We do use a more ecologically friendly disposable diaper alternative when out and on most nights.

Can someone please introduce this idea to a seamstress down there. I bet she will make a lot of money sewing diapers.

http://www.mother-ease.com/

 

[dcareamama]

Although I am trying to keep the Dominican culture alive with my boys, there are definitely parts of the culture worth avoiding, such as excessive use of the bottle and "bobo". Neither Dominic nor Noah have ever had a pacifier in their mouth - they both spat it out in disgust whenever it was popped in there - they much prefer the breast. So I was their pacifier. Not complaining though, breastfeeding is the best diet in the whole world! Neither boy would ever take a bottle, either. Noah still doesn't know how to drink from one. He has been drinking from a sippy cup or glass - yes glass! or water bottle - since he was six months old. He's now 11 months, and drinks perfectly from a cup. And I got the "abusadora" from many Dominicans, too, because I refused to give a bottle. I smiled and explained, well, you see, that's why they have such good teeth! Many also asked me why I don't feed my children formula instead of breastmilk. I guess since all gringas are "rich", why would I act like a "poor" person and breastfeed ...argh...sometimes the mentality of people is shocking...

Criss...fwiw, Dominic (4) and Noah (1) both sleep in our king-sized bed, too. Angel can't sleep without them!

Hi Trina,
Just ignore the Dominicans who second guess your choice to breastfeed your children. That is another sad change in the DR as most mothers now are not breastfeeding their babies. I respect every woman's feeding choices, but I will never understand the choice of not to breastfeed your child. Again, I respect it, but do not understand it. When I took my then 14 month old to the DR, everyone was shocked I was still breastfeeding him, including some of my own relatives. Heck, my mother tells me I was breastfed until I was 4, so I don't know why they would find it strange. Must be the "younger" generation, LOL. I breastfed my first son until he was 20 months and we only weaned because I had become pregnant again and my body slowly stopped producing milk. I am now breastfeeding my second son exclusively. Even though I never had a can of formula in the house, there were many a times I wished my sons would take at least expressed milk in a bottle from my husband. Needless to say, my sons have never had a bottle in their mouths.

Since they never wanted anything but the breast, when it came time, I taught them to use a regular cup (not even a sippy cup) from six months on. My seven month old now takes sips of water from a stainless steel cup I bought from a outdoors equipment store. I bring the cup over to his mouth and he sips - voila! Of course, I would probably be asked to give up my Dominican citizenship if people knew about this, LOL!

Anyway, next time you are in the DR, tell Dominicans that breast milk is the best food for babies, punto! And, here's more information in case they don't believe you.

http://www.promom.org/101/

 

[dcareamama]

"I guess since all gringas are "rich", why would I act like a "poor" person and breastfeed ...argh...sometimes the mentality of people is shocking..."

They did a study in the US about the rates of breastfeeding. The highest rates of breastfeeding were among highly educated, middle to high income white women. Interesting, isn't?

 

[Stodgord]

I think one of the reason why Pediatricians in the US don't like kids sharing bed with their parents, especially infants is because the likelyhood of a parent rolling over onto the baby and/or covering the child face with a cover thus asphixiating (sp?) the child. Although I have heard this happening in the US, I have never heard this happening in the DR.

 

[trina]

I think one of the reason why Pediatricians in the US don't like kids sharing bed with their parents, especially infants is because the likelyhood of a parent rolling over onto the baby and/or covering the child face with a cover thus asphixiating (sp?) the child. Although I have heard this happening in the US, I have never heard this happening in the DR.

I think if you're a very heavy sleeper, you have something to worry about in this case. I sleep well, but I am always subconsciously aware of my children. Although there are times when I just wish my kids would have their own beds, I also find it very comforting having them beside me. I can roll over and cuddle with them anytime I want. I love watching them sleep. I know they are safe, however, if they were in their own room, I'd be scared to death of something happening (SIDS - although I know that sleeping with them could never prevent this) to them, and I would never sleep. The only downfall with Dominic is that before I weened him, he loved to nurse all night, and I didn't sleep. Noah (11 months) has been an excellent sleeper, and only wakes up once at about 4:30 or 5 when I'm getting out of bed for the day. It's kinda nice to have that time with him anyways.

dcareamama, you gave some excellent advice, and thank you for the wonderful links. Rather than ignore the Dominicans who look down on me for breastfeeding, I take the opportunity to educate them of the benefits of breastfeeding. There is just nothing better for your baby. Dominicans love to listen to what a gringa says, so you have a captive audience where you may be able to make a huge difference on how they raise their children. I explain that you are giving your baby the best start possible by breastfeeding. It is a proven fact that breastfeeding for six months reduces your chance of breast cancer by up to 45%!!! Those two points alone makes it valid for both you and your baby, never mind the other benefits, such as no ear infections for the baby, better teeth, bonding, weight loss, convenience... Many who opt for the bottle say that the bottle is more convenient. HUH??? What could be more convenient than breastfeeding? No bottles to sterilize, no getting up in the middle of the night to prepare a bottle, and then feed them, no cost!!! I just don't get it. My only issue is that weening is a b!tch. Dom would still be breastfeeding if I wouldn't have forced the issue at 18 months, I'm sure! I don't think Noah will be any easier. But hey, I love the opportunity to bond in this way with them.

 

[samanasuenos]

Keep on keepin' on PLEASE!

WOW!

Thank you so much to everyone who has commented. I have learned so much on this thread, and more than I had bargained for. (I had hesitated out of worry that I would be teased mercilessly for asking.....)

I will not say any more on this thread, but thank you, and please keep it coming!

Me dej co boc abairta!

 

[Keith R]

Keith R, the last time I saw you, I think I mentioned that we use cloth diapers on our two sons here in the States. I also may have mentioned how I searched for cloth diapers in the DR and could not find any. Actually, they exist, but they are used now as pretty embroidered burp cloths. That is another thing that has changed in the DR. No one seems to use cloth diapers anymore, not even the poor. I was cloth diapered and I remember even my cousins being cloth diapered in the late seventies and early eighties in the DR. There is a lot of research out there about the benefits of using cloth diapers, not only for the environment but also for the babies. Basically, less toxic junk against the baby's skin by using cloth. That is the main reason I chose to cloth diaper my sons. We do use a more ecologically friendly disposable diaper alternative when out and on most nights.

Thanks, Natasha. I think unless someone can show me that cloth diapers are still available in the DR, may not be much point to that Green Team "guest blog" we talked about on cloth diapers vs. pampers...

 

[AnnaC]

"I guess since all gringas are "rich", why would I act like a "poor" person and breastfeed ...argh...sometimes the mentality of people is shocking..."

They did a study in the US about the rates of breastfeeding. The highest rates of breastfeeding were among highly educated, middle to high income white women. Interesting, isn't?

I keep forgetting that this is our Dominican Natasha

How are you doing? We miss you around here.

 

[trina]

That is so funny. I was thinking about her when I was reading what she "dcareamama" wrote, thinking "this sounds an awful lot like Natasha", but not knowing that it was. Welcome back, Natasha!!! We've missed you dearly, it's been way too long!!!

 

[dcareamama]

Hi Anna and Trina,
My apologies for taking so long to respond. All is well here, however my husband recently injured his left knee and things got all of a sudden hectic, to say the least. Poor guy is on crutches and I am now taking care of three boys ;-)

I check DR1 every three months or so since I am so busy with the boys. I left my job to be a full-time mother three years ago and love every minute of it! Even though I have been "hanging" around parenting boards more often, I nonetheless pop in here once in a while. I am always glad to "see" you both and thanks for remembering me.

 

[trina]

Hi Anna and Trina,
My apologies for taking so long to respond. All is well here, however my husband recently injured his left knee and things got all of a sudden hectic, to say the least. Poor guy is on crutches and I am now taking care of three boys ;-)

I check DR1 every three months or so since I am so busy with the boys. I left my job to be a full-time mother three years ago and love every minute of it! Even though I have been "hanging" around parenting boards more often, I nonetheless pop in here once in a while. I am always glad to "see" you both and thanks for remembering me.

You're a little hard to forget. You were always a wonderful presence on the board, so you've definitely been missed. Give my wishes for a speedy recovery to your husband, and try to stop in more often!

 

[linamia]

Natasha,

Its wonderful to see your posts, it so good to read such well written posts from Dominicanas on the board. It gives a balance to all the rubbish that is said about us on this board. Please post more often. Enjoy your children, they grow up fast.

I did whatever I felt was good for my girls without much regards to what other had to say. The measure of being a good parent and doing the right thing is seeing how they grow up and how they live by your standards and the morals you taught them. I am very proud of my girls and I know they have enriched me in as many ways as I have them.

This morning my daughter and I met on the bus and she called me "mami" in front of a busload of people my friend joked that she should call me her big sister. As I looked at her and I joked that yes I was indeed only 5 years older than her. I felt a sudden rush of pride that this gentle giant was my firstborn, and that I did a good job with everything that concerns her, from diapers to discipline. I like the well rounded young lady that she has become.

Se was bottled fed for medical reasons, she wore diapers, she walked early she was potty train early and she was a very independent child. I like to say she grew up to be a well rounded individual with a good head on her shoulders.

I wouldn't do anything different that I did with my children, because the outcome thus far is very rewarding. Out of all the roles I have played in life the one I have done the best in has been motherhood.

To answer the OP questions most of the people you see buying one diaper at a time are people who can’t buy a whole pack or those that only use it for baby’s bedtime. I understand the need for it in the US. I question the need for it in the DR since so many times the child is cared for at home by family members. I think a diaper in such hot whether must be harsh on a baby’s bottom. My kids wore “pantis” when they visited DR as babies

To CC
I am glad you a good parent. There are many Dominicans that take the time to educate their children in all aspect. Many do potty train them. I did my family and friends did and many in DR do. I know I know I am not qualify to speak about DR as I don’t reside there and all but I so enjoy it. Remind me to tell you about my baby diaper changing, baby bathing, baby feeding Dominican husband.

Lina

 

[samanasuenos]

Welcome Lina!

Dear Lina, Thank you so much for posting! And you MUST tell us ALL about this incredible husband/father. It would be very appropriate to what the thread has become - a wider forum on parenting and cultural differences.

Please tell us all about this great Dominican father!
-- from the OP