Sharing Time With My Son

evanlee1

New member
Aug 9, 2009
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Hello All!
Having difficult time sharing time with my son in the DR.
Anyone out there with similar situation.
 

AnnaC

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Jan 2, 2002
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It would be helpful if you gave us more info such as why you are having a difficult time. Is it distance, money, other parents not allowing it?

Are you a Dominican living abroad? If not then this thread needs to be in another forum which I can move it if I know the answer.
 

evanlee1

New member
Aug 9, 2009
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Hello Anna,

Yes, I am an American and the mother of my child is Dominican. Our child was born in the States, and his mother recently moved back to the island. So if you need to move to me to another forum, that's fine.
 

Ramondon

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Jul 27, 2009
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I recently divorced my wife and she has custody of my daughter. I live in the states and she lives with the child in the Dominican Republic(santiago). She was not happy with the child support that the courts of the dominican republic mandated that I send her on a monthly basis. She tried to play the game that if I don't send her more money than that she would not let me see my child. I took a week off from work went down there and went to El tribual de menores and explained my situation and the court mandated that I give at least 2 weeks notice to her when I am down there thru my attorney and that she hand me over my child for the duration of my trip in the dominican republic. The only reason I even got an attorney for this was so that we don't have to talk directly. But there are laws down there you just have to seek them out.
 

evanlee1

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Aug 9, 2009
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Hello Ramondon,
Good to hear I'm not alone in this boat! Not easy situation. Thanks for the repsonse.
Evan
I recently divorced my wife and she has custody of my daughter. I live in the states and she lives with the child in the Dominican Republic(santiago). She was not happy with the child support that the courts of the dominican republic mandated that I send her on a monthly basis. She tried to play the game that if I don't send her more money than that she would not let me see my child. I took a week off from work went down there and went to El tribual de menores and explained my situation and the court mandated that I give at least 2 weeks notice to her when I am down there thru my attorney and that she hand me over my child for the duration of my trip in the dominican republic. The only reason I even got an attorney for this was so that we don't have to talk directly. But there are laws down there you just have to seek them out.
 

Ramondon

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Jul 27, 2009
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Well I can put you in contact with her if you want, I send her $400.00 a month plus I pay a mortgage of $600.00 a month for our apartment where she lives at. And she still believes I should pay more than that, when we were together I used to send her $800.00 a month for support but since I don't have to support her I only have to send the $400.00 a month for my child.
 

Ramondon

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Jul 27, 2009
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And on another note the court mandated that I give her only $4,000.00 pesos a month and I said that was not enough to bring up my child so I voluntarily give her $400.00 a month.
 

Ramondon

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Jul 27, 2009
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Read my previous post I don't have a problem with any of this, I am glad to give that amount believe me if it were in the states it would be double or even triple that amount. And we reached a settlement were she has to allow me to see the child if not she can be arrested, she has already tried it several times with dire circumstances for her. One time she refused to let me see my child and she was arrested that same day and held in jail until I felt pitty for her and asked them to release her.
 

Ramondon

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Jul 27, 2009
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I know what you mean also, I know of father's who are real s___bags, they do not care about the child at all, I hear cases of fathers only sending $100.00 a month and that won't cover the basic necessities for the child on a monthly basis.
 

ExtremeR

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Mar 22, 2006
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And on another note the court mandated that I give her only $4,000.00 pesos a month and I said that was not enough to bring up my child so I voluntarily give her $400.00 a month.

You're paying a really good amount of child support. Defend your right of seeing your child.
 

rsg

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Oct 21, 2008
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Well I can put you in contact with her if you want, I send her $400.00 a month plus I pay a mortgage of $600.00 a month for our apartment where she lives at. And she still believes I should pay more than that, when we were together I used to send her $800.00 a month for support but since I don't have to support her I only have to send the $400.00 a month for my child.

NO, correction Rsmondon, you pay $600 a month for your ex's and her chulos apartment..Even at $400 a month in support, and you paying for the apartment, your ex has officially joined the Dominican middle class.

Yoy sound like a nice dude who is trying to do the best for his child, but you have to know that your ex and her new vida are living the high life at your expense.
 
Feb 7, 2007
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Ramondon, I would do this: make a surprise visit to YOUR apartment (if you pay mortgage, I guess you have a title or something similar, right?) and see the living conditions... see how the fridge is stocked. See if there is milk for the child. See the clothes. See and take pictures of everything.

I would do the visit in presence of your attorney and another witness, maybe a religious minister.

If at any point you feel that the US$400 you send is going where it should not go, you can go to tribunal de menores (you can visit fiscal de menores for that over there in ST, also you can go directly to SD to La Feria and make appointment with Marisol Tobal in Procuraduria General, Jueza de menores, the very boss. She is VERY good at having the laws enforced and helping the struggling parent ---regardless of sex -- against the abusing one).

In the Tribunal you ask that the child support be changed from "cash support" to "material support and some cash" ... so you can, for example, send only US$ 100 to US$150 a month and pay the rest in food, clothing, medical insurance etc. You would make arrangements with a local supermarket who would send a monthly food basket (canasta mensual) according to the nutritious needs of the child, not the mother and chulo.
 

J D Sauser

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Nov 20, 2004
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www.hispanosuizainvest.com
Find out by a surprise visit if she even keeps the child with her or has it dumped with some "folks" somewhere, while she is living la vida loca with who knows whom, as so many of these "mothers" just love to.
IF she doesn't have the child, go see a reputable strong lawyer and have him make the case at the courts and get sole custody for you and take the child home. Once she will see that then persisting on her visiting rights is not giving her any financial perks, you will be surprised but pleased to find out how fast her "motherly" instincts dissipate in... nothing.

Look, tigueras don't understand. They live off wanting to believe that extrangeritos/gringos are suckers. And they are as long as you play along their rules.
No child visit. NO money! NONE*! Voila! THAT she will understand immediately because her chulo will be all over her for a new "bling" or what ever. (* a lawyer will explain to you how to keep the money you legally have to pay in support in escrow, so you are legally covered meanwhile). Downgrade her to what the courts would allocate, which is substantially less than the grand you are dumping now.
Doesn't keep the child, doesn't dedicate the money you send FOR the CHILD, have the it's custody and bye, bye. Never argue with them or seek to confront them in anyway. You'll bet nowhere but into deep one!
Have'em play YOUR game. Take control.

Don't get me wrong. I am ALL FOR being responsible and pay along for the well being and good upbringing of you offspring. But IT SHOULD REACH the CHILD FIRST before it gets dumped on the mother's trashy trapos, cell phones with features the mom's useless brother will never be able to even demystify and funny tattoos all over her you know what and her chulo's booze.



... J-D.