- Thread starter Gempull
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sticky situation
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Where do these guys meet these crazy women? All of my friends seemed to find good ones, but every time I turn around some foreigner found the bad apple. Is it because men tend to do research with the brain between their legs rather then the one in their head? I'm not judging anyone. I've been fooled before, but never again....
My only advice for the op is you've learned a life lesson. Don't forget the harsh lesson you learned. Give me a pretty personality over a pretty face any day.
My only advice for the op is you've learned a life lesson. Don't forget the harsh lesson you learned. Give me a pretty personality over a pretty face any day.
To find a good person one has to look beyond the looks, but I noticed that very oftern nice looking, spiritually and physically healthy people are actually very nice too, because they don't really need to worry about what they look like. They don't need to travel somewhere to find good company, and don't have any anger or jelousy towards others associated with their looks.
And, still you, guys, would always prefer an attractive woman to an average looking one, and their personalities would not matter that much.
And, still you, guys, would always prefer an attractive woman to an average looking one, and their personalities would not matter that much.
My 2nd wife was an "average looking" Woman. We were friends for years before we started dating. We got along great and lived together for a year before we got married. She concieved our first child together during second night of our honeymoon at sunset, on the balcony of our (west facing) hotel suite in Key West.
I did everything right, not like the first marriage to the most gorgeous Woman whom I had ever laid eyes on at the time. We both had solid careers and in 14 years of marriage we were blessed with two beautiful daughters (they look more like me). When she turned selfish I thought it was a phase but over those miserable last couple years as she added irresponsibility and negligence and eventually contempt I knew that the handwriting was on the wall. I divorced her in favor of self preservation.
I shared this "TMI" moment to underscore the fact that at the end of the day you can do everything wrong or do everything right, marry for the "love" of sex, beauty, money, companionship, stability or whatever combination thereof floats your boat and the results will still be whatever they turn out to be. Both parties have to be willing to put the marriage before themselves.
One horse can only pull a two horse cart so far.
Best post to date.
Love dies out after a while. You took it well and moved on.
Right on!!!!
Great post and too true. People change, and not always for the better.
Kind of makes you sad for my parents' generation, who often stayed in bad marriages "no matter what".
Makes me appreciate what I have even more.
AE
From my limited experience
, I realized that people do NOT change (or at least very rarely). Someday you just wake up and see the relationship for what it is instead of what you want it to be because your other half is NOT going to change.Relationships tend to get better with the years if you do no persist on changes on behalf of your partner and vice versa. That is my experience.
Grey, we only hear your version of the story and everybody is hoehaa, good on you. But maybe your ex-wife have send out signals you choose to ignore because you thought they were not relevant. Woman tend to want to talk more about their relationship then men and when the man doesn't really understand the signals, they will try everything to get your attention, even being selfish.
Acira
Grey, we only hear your version of the story and everybody is hoehaa, good on you. But maybe your ex-wife have send out signals you choose to ignore because you thought they were not relevant. Woman tend to want to talk more about their relationship then men and when the man doesn't really understand the signals, they will try everything to get your attention, even being selfish.
Acira
But what happened to your second marriage if she was so great and you knew each other for years?
The answer preceded the question:
Those changes didn't stop with me. They eventually extended to the children which is why I'm the custodial parent.
Who knows what happened? I beat my head against the wall trying to figure it out. Maybe it's some change of life chemistry or something but at the end of years talking to her and everybody else in the World who'd stop long enough to listen I ran out of gas and bailed. I don't care what her "side of the story" is. Me and the kids are just fine.
So, some women turn selfish when married? Interesting. Maybe they just pretend to be "nice" to get married and then show their true colors. I have not noticed any kind of changes in myself while being married or single. I guess, some people just don't change. Men change though, stop giving much attention. They think they "got you" already.
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