Criss Colon said:
That when there are "X","husbands",and/or "Boyfriends" around,they are screwing your "Girlfriend" when you are not there!!!!The fact that she lives with the sister of the "X",only makes things worse! Most "Latin" women don't remain "close" to the men they "divorce",or break-up with,"Unless"!!!!!!
I would drop her like a "Bad Habit"!!!
Your "Jealousy" means that you have doubts! Tey are most likely valid!!
CCCCCC
When we were living together in Puerto Rico, her son came to visit and we all went and rented a house in Cabo Rojo. This is included her Ex husband and his wife and children. He's a decent guy. They don't really get along and she did not call him papi. She IS close to his sister. They get along great. But as for her Ex, she doesn't really like him. But they have kids together and they work together when they need to for the sake of the children. He lives in Puerto Rico. I have no problems with him.
I do NOT think she is cheating or being unfaithful. Not in anyway cheating.
I don't cosider this true jealousy. Because I don't believe she is cheating at all.
I spoke with my godsons father and talked to him about it. He does'nt know the word papi from anything. He calls his wife dear and sweetheart. He said if she called someone or someone called her dear, it would not bother him. It WOULD bother him if she or someone used the word sweetheart.
They do strange things as well. If dancing, they will grind with someone else. (have the womens butt rub against the mans dick) I would never find this acceptable, but they somehow do. Everyone is different.
I do think that we all might have words that WE consider SPECIAL.
For him that word is sweetheart, you don't say that to all.
For ME that word is Papi/Daddy. This is because of my culture and how it is used in the states.
For HER, in DR or PR, this may not be how the word is used or intended.
I believe her intent is good.
Is there words that you all consider special? To be used, normally, with your wife or husband? What are they?
....
I think the bottom line in this discussion is that in the DR, papi is said to lots of people by lots of people and it's not a special word.
In the states, papi is said to a father, son, husband, boyfriend, or someone you have an interest in or want.
This of course conflicts. I don't recall her saying this alot and I think it was overblown by the initial reaction of Graciela that she thought I was accusing her of being unfaithful, which I was not.
I THINK that after talking about it together, she may better understand how I feel about it and I understand better how she has used the word. I THINK she will make an attempt to not say it as much or use a different word. If she slips up and it is said from time to time, I think I can handle that.
I came into this message board to get a better understanding of the word and culture. I still hold that word to mean something here in the us, if we were living in dr, I'd have to make an adjustment. Since she is here, I think it would be wise for her to make an adjustment.
I still hold papi and mami to mean something special. It kind of sucks that they really don't mean anything when she says them. But hey, we are all different.
I think I understand her better now and some of the dr culture better now.
We'll see how it works out.
Tony understands where I'm coming from. Another friend Rob, thinks I am over reacting.
I guess my last thought on the subject (although still have interest in anyone elses thoughts and input), is with her son that has 12 years old. We get along great and he says he loves me and we've talked about him calling me papi. He asked me what he should call me. I said at the time to call me what he want's too. I'd love it if he thought enough of me to call me papi/father/daddy.
I figured that is what it means. If he calls me papi, but then calls other adult men papi, then it probably doesn't mean a damn thing. I'd be better off being called my name, or daddy/dad/father in english. Then I know what it means.
again, I appreciate all the input. I trust her intent. I don't believe she is cheating. The word is special to me and not so much to her. I asked about the meaning of the word and it's use, not if she was being unfaithful.
oh, she also doesnt' say papi in the boardroom. In the lunch room or maybe the hall way.
Anyways, thanks again, I hope to goto the DR and visit her family and DR at somepoint. More feedback is forever welcome, I'll be checking up on it. I got a better response that I thought I would.
