What about Dominicans themselves? How do they react to the fact that people around them are not telling the truth? How do they deal with their own compatriots? Or they sort of "listen between the lines" and know what that person actually means when all this BS comes out of their mouths?
- Thread starter Matilda
- Start date
Why do Dominicans lie???
Was that the intermission? :laugh:
Getting back to Act 2 in this thread.....................
The part of your quote below aimelove I believe indicates the difference in our philosophy of teaching (& yes I used to teach adults). I tended to learn alongside my students - it was a 2 way street. And I don't know that 'I know better', really I don't. All I would say is that 'I know different' (transvestite frogs notwithstanding.............) So if you think I am smug (& you may well be correct, although I prefer the word opinionated) perhaps a little self-examination would be in order..................? My presence on this thread to learn not to teach. And what I am seeing on the 'lying' issue is a cultural difference in definition. Where these are the 'excuse' type lies they are defined as lies by the non-Dominicans here but perhaps not by many Dominicans? I don't believe it is about 'lying' as such. I think the 'excuses' are about not losing face. This is where the European/N.American definition of truth collides with latino machismo I think.
I enjoy hearing another person's approach to teaching and learning (teachers rock!), but I don't think that was the point. The point was that the thread was making some people uncomfortable because they were expressing their opinions about why Dominican people lie, and it was bordering on the offensive to some. All I was saying was that, if we were all in person, it would be an excellent opportunity for some of those beliefs to be looked at. If people don't feel comfortable about saying what they have to say, how can we find some common ground and create change?
Also, I wrote "when YOU smugly........" I meant YOU meaning people in general. I didn't address you personally. If you (now I am addressing you) read what I wrote this morning in this thread (culminating in the frog pictures) you'll notice I got a little upset over wording as well. For me, it happens when I skim through the posts and want to reply quickly without haven't read it thoroughly. It happens.
OK intermission is over .. Thanks for starting Act 2 Lambada.
Alyonka's question is interesting? Does anyone have insight?
(hint hint - the mod wants this thread to move a little closer to the topic!)
There are some classical vignettes in Jon Anderson's blog here where he describes the culture as "... a society which is regulated much along the lines of what anthropologists used to call “shame culture” (as opposed to the hypothetical “guilt culture” found in developed Protestant nations), appearances do count for a lot." So, it becomes more important to save face than to be honest. And if one can allow our fellow Dominicans to save face, interactions are much easier.
More a Question than a Reply
Alyonka's question is interesting? Does anyone have insight?
(hint hint - the mod wants this thread to move a little closer to the topic!)
There are some classical vignettes in Jon Anderson's blog here where he describes the culture as "... a society which is regulated much along the lines of what anthropologists used to call “shame culture” (as opposed to the hypothetical “guilt culture” found in developed Protestant nations), appearances do count for a lot." So, it becomes more important to save face than to be honest. And if one can allow our fellow Dominicans to save face, interactions are much easier.
More a Question than a Reply
Last edited:
There's too many variables to that question.
One would have to cite an example.
Some BS is expected from others, specially when it's in the world of boasting.
Lying to defend oneself is expected.
It's way to generalized and complex a question to come up with any good answer, not to mention that it's opening the door for Nals to "delight" us with multi paragraph replies.
The closest thing to a reply for Alyonka is that Dominicans who have been brought up and educated to tell the truth, feel the same way about lying and liars as we do.
Those who lie perpetually, expect the same from others.
Interesting, thanks! It is just really funny to see older people behave like children and also listen to all these disgusting things Dominicans have to say about each other after they had a fight - she is a liar, she is this, this and that, he is a liar, this, this and that ..... etc. And none of it is true
I don't know about all Dominicans, but my husband lies (and he makes a big difference between white lies and black lies and he NEVER black lies he says!!), just when he knows I will be cross - ie lost cell phone, and given things away. The kids lie when they have taken something - from coca cola from the fridge, to soap and toothpaste from husbands bathroom, to my old computer - just like kids the world over. I think there are different kinds of liars - the sankies who have a wife and kids who string women along purely for money, are just 100% bad in my books. I have no problem with builders or workers usually. I think a lot of it is like when you ask a Dominican for directions even if they have no idea they will give you directions and you end up getting hopelessly lost!!! They just don't like to disappoint.
Matilda
Matilda
Yes. I was riding my bike in Washington Heights and was run over by a dominicana. She was making a right turn from the left-handed lane and I was going straight. She just ran me over like I wasn't there.
Ironically enough I skidded in front of an ambulance, and the dominicans standing on the corner stopped it and demanded that they take me to the hospital.
When the cops got there she wanted to know why she was being detained as I was the one who hit her car, even though she made the turn into the lane I was riding a straight line in!!!!
I remember one of the bystanders saying to her "You can't leave. This isn't Santo Domingo!! Here we have laws you have to obey!!"
Her and her passengers' statements on the police accident form were a joke and it was a big reason I won the case.
Her passenger said they did not see me and that before the accident it seemed as if I lost control of the bike. Now how could you see me losing control if you didn't see me at all? Her lying pretty much won the case for me.
...and I have been in love with dominicanas ever since!!!
Check through AK's posts, Chris. Most of what his says is not true.
Hmmm, in keeping with this thread, perhaps he's dominican? Never mind, he's a stereotypical NYer, which means lying is second nature to him. Truth (or the absence of such), after all, knows no boundaries.
Hmmm, in keeping with this thread, perhaps he's dominican? Never mind, he's a stereotypical NYer, which means lying is second nature to him. Truth (or the absence of such), after all, knows no boundaries.
I don't know if you were kidding, but New Yorkers are not generally known to be liars. On the contrary, most New Yorkers are brutally honest. Its one of the reasons I like it so much here. Alot of serious things can happen to you here at any time (like 9/11), so the concern over being embarassed over the truth is minimal. Also, most New Yorkers are street savvy, so they can usually tell if you are telling them bs. Street vendors will lie about the authenticity of their goods to get money from tourists, young people in the dating scene lie, but you don't hear too many unnecessary "whoppers" here from adults. Also, there are so many people here, that many of your interactions outside of work are with people you will never see again in your life. If you meet someone for the only time in your life, you tend to want to show them the "real deal". Life moves too fast here for too much nonsense like that.